It's been a while, no?
Greetings. I have not yet succumbed to death. Comforting thought, isn't it?
I've been feeling really introspective lately. I suspect it has a little to do with finally getting some time to reflect, alone and unbothered…..
A bit of time in the dry sauna is good for the body, mind, and soul. Methinks Native Americans were on to something great with the idea of sweat lodges for purification.
Back at the point, I’ve had some strange encounters of the third kind with men. =\ this troubles me as it appears that I’ve somehow picked up a mild (thankfully) case of androphobia. It could just be anxiety, but, it comes from suspecting every one of them of having some sort of ulterior motive. *shrug* I can’t be blamed totally. Most do, I just don’t trust any I’m not already acquainted with on a friends only basis. It’s probably one of the main reasons that I keep the company of so many gay men.
That being said, the internet offers everyone a sense of near anonymity. This is a balm to frayed nerves and anxious beings. I don’t have to worry about someone actually approaching me…I’ve the safety of distance. Of course the persistence of some to overcome even that particularly convenient obstacle confounds me. I’m pretty clear about my views on men and any existent desire for copulating with me. *wrinkles nose*
I got the funniest message detailing something one such male would do to me given the opportunity. Instead of eliciting arousal or positive response, I had such a fit of the giggles I specifically made a call to my dearest Cass to share with her the funny. I figured she could use the laughter. We came to the consensus that both of us have written better.
Note: I prefer third person omniscient. Kthxbai.
Just yesterday evening, I was spoken to while I was at the gym. It’s entirely more disconcerting. I go to the gym to burn calories and chase the fitness thing. I do not go to socialize. I studiously avoid conversing. Ipod on with a serious grrr arrrg game face for cardio and weight training. Why on Earth would anyone think that I’m up for a chat? Additionally, there are plenty of helpful staff floating around. Do you not think that they might be a more prudent choice for facility questions, directions, and hours of operation? Last I checked I was wearing exercise clothing, not PF staff wear. Also he broke into my ‘zone’. I go there with purpose.
Ugh! I thought that was the end of it. More the fool I am for daring to think so. After that loveliness I was hyper aware of the fact that he was working out on equipment that always happened to be my periphery. I thought I’d successfully avoided conversation…when he approached me on the dual axis rear deltoid fly/row machine. Again I was listening to music…and doing back work (my favorite! :D ) and here comes this dude asking me about where the ab equipment is. Why don’t I look dangerous? L
He talked to me about a myriad of things including probiotic cleanses, tinctures, brainwave machine and lyme disease. I thought for the longest he was trying to make a sale.
I do Advocare, I have all I need. J So when that was clear I expected him to skidaddle. No… no.. he kept talking to me. D: *distress* I was so confounded and couldn’t figure out his intention. I kept waiting for him to ask me something. Didn’t happen. He finally left me all reluctant, as though he wanted to say something, but, changed his mind last minute.
“ I guess I’ll see you around Sarah…”
Smiles and nods. What *was* that?
I also found myself thinking about the Tower of Babel. If we weren’t meant to get to heaven and got scattered, might it not be that our religions about the world are just pieces to a tapestry that would give us better understanding of the divine?
That is to say, in order to understand our creator we might need to get along and put it all together…
Just saying!
;)
I've been feeling really introspective lately. I suspect it has a little to do with finally getting some time to reflect, alone and unbothered…..
A bit of time in the dry sauna is good for the body, mind, and soul. Methinks Native Americans were on to something great with the idea of sweat lodges for purification.
Back at the point, I’ve had some strange encounters of the third kind with men. =\ this troubles me as it appears that I’ve somehow picked up a mild (thankfully) case of androphobia. It could just be anxiety, but, it comes from suspecting every one of them of having some sort of ulterior motive. *shrug* I can’t be blamed totally. Most do, I just don’t trust any I’m not already acquainted with on a friends only basis. It’s probably one of the main reasons that I keep the company of so many gay men.
That being said, the internet offers everyone a sense of near anonymity. This is a balm to frayed nerves and anxious beings. I don’t have to worry about someone actually approaching me…I’ve the safety of distance. Of course the persistence of some to overcome even that particularly convenient obstacle confounds me. I’m pretty clear about my views on men and any existent desire for copulating with me. *wrinkles nose*
I got the funniest message detailing something one such male would do to me given the opportunity. Instead of eliciting arousal or positive response, I had such a fit of the giggles I specifically made a call to my dearest Cass to share with her the funny. I figured she could use the laughter. We came to the consensus that both of us have written better.
Note: I prefer third person omniscient. Kthxbai.
Just yesterday evening, I was spoken to while I was at the gym. It’s entirely more disconcerting. I go to the gym to burn calories and chase the fitness thing. I do not go to socialize. I studiously avoid conversing. Ipod on with a serious grrr arrrg game face for cardio and weight training. Why on Earth would anyone think that I’m up for a chat? Additionally, there are plenty of helpful staff floating around. Do you not think that they might be a more prudent choice for facility questions, directions, and hours of operation? Last I checked I was wearing exercise clothing, not PF staff wear. Also he broke into my ‘zone’. I go there with purpose.
Ugh! I thought that was the end of it. More the fool I am for daring to think so. After that loveliness I was hyper aware of the fact that he was working out on equipment that always happened to be my periphery. I thought I’d successfully avoided conversation…when he approached me on the dual axis rear deltoid fly/row machine. Again I was listening to music…and doing back work (my favorite! :D ) and here comes this dude asking me about where the ab equipment is. Why don’t I look dangerous? L
He talked to me about a myriad of things including probiotic cleanses, tinctures, brainwave machine and lyme disease. I thought for the longest he was trying to make a sale.
I do Advocare, I have all I need. J So when that was clear I expected him to skidaddle. No… no.. he kept talking to me. D: *distress* I was so confounded and couldn’t figure out his intention. I kept waiting for him to ask me something. Didn’t happen. He finally left me all reluctant, as though he wanted to say something, but, changed his mind last minute.
“ I guess I’ll see you around Sarah…”
Smiles and nods. What *was* that?
I also found myself thinking about the Tower of Babel. If we weren’t meant to get to heaven and got scattered, might it not be that our religions about the world are just pieces to a tapestry that would give us better understanding of the divine?
That is to say, in order to understand our creator we might need to get along and put it all together…
Just saying!
;)