counting one, two, three...

[egregiouslypink]

LOOK IT WAS THE ONLY SONG I COULD THINK OF OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD THAT HAD COUNTING IN THE LYRICS. Don't judge my Brit-Brit love.

It's meme time, Taxon. WITHOUT FURTHER ADO:

THE FIVE THINGS MEME

We've all seen the fic, right? 'Five Times ________ Did ____________' and so on. We're gonna ~adapt~ that sucker, aw yis.

Here's how it goes:
→ COMMENT

Comments

[egregiouslypink]

USUAL SUSPECTS SO.

Dawn, Faith, and Damon. (Because trying to brain all four at once will lead to failure.)

AW YIS.

[midwesten]

5 Taxonomites Damon Would Never Admit He'd Probably Have Sex With. People are going to regret letting me into this meme.

/finishes this in a second comment I NEED DIET COKE

[egregiouslypink]

SCREAM.

Okay so. LA LA LA FIC, I FEEL LIKE IT.

1. LEXI.

"Tell anyone we did that and I'll put vervain in your stash." Lexi's already wiggling back into her pants, face set in the usual moue of disgust. His bed is rumpled, smells like them both. Laundry day, then. "Tell Stefan and I'll forget the booze and cram it down your throat."

It stings a little, because... they just fucked, she can't save the threats for five minutes? But Damon just stretches, yawning and scratching his stomach. "Was it good for you too?"

The boot she throws at his head just misses, and Damon is slightly smug when it's not because he moved out of the way. "I still hate you." She's just the the door when Damon grins, pushes his luck one more time.

"Same time tomorrow?"

The second boot doesn't miss.

2. GODRIC.

"You really can't eat?" Damon's halfway through his burger, Godric sipping from a glass of blood and watching politely. "And you sleep in coffinsGodric's laugh is genuine, if a little disconnected; like something newly dug up from the ground, the

Re: 2

[fire]

HOT. :D

/popcorn.gif

[egregiouslypink]

ZEE YOU ARE NOT RIVER STOP PERVING FROM THE CEILING

[faderbroderson]

WHATEVAH, I CAN PERV FROM WHEREVER I WANT!

[egregiouslypink]

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

[egregiouslypink]

3. ALARIC.

Ric's a complicated puzzle of a man. Hunts vampires, hates the man who turned his wife and took her away from him-- not to mention slept with her himself-- and is now also fucking that man.

He's also a man who watches stupid children's shows, because he planted a foot on the back and Damon's back and shoved, sending him tumbling off the bed and onto the floor, hair sticking up in odd spikes as he says, "The Pokemon theme? Screw you, Damon."

Damon just laughs.

4. MIKE WESTEN.

Damon's been fooling humans for almost two hundred years. He's very good at what he does; hiding the evidence and sometimes, the bodies. But he's also used to leaving town when he (inevitably) fucks up, having twenty or thirty years of time for everyone to forget about that nice young man who was a little too close to the scene of the crime

[smecker]

FIVE TIMES DAWN HAD TO BE THE MATURE ONE

[egregiouslypink]

→ Back when Buffy went all WHOOOOOO, ARSON! LET'S BURN DOWN A VAMPIRE'S BAR, THIS WILL GO WELL Dawn tried to stop her. She eventually threw up her hands and went along with it, but someone had to bring up the fact that escalation is generally a shitty tactic when you have a salad fork and your enemy has a bazooka.

→ After Angelus tortured her, Buffy was blaming herself. So Dawn played it off like a couple vampire bites and a broken arm was the extent of things, because Buffy's awesome at guilt like that. (...Then she never told, but that wasn't maturity so much as cowardice.)

→ Arguing with Willow sucks. Sucks, sucks, sucks. But she's putting them all at risk here, because her magic is going places that equal hamster smackdown. And if Willow pushes any harder, Dawn will push back.

→ Faith. Just... Faith. Dawn's not a fan, but she holds back from reminding everyone in Taxon Faith's not just the hot topless chick on the tablets, she's a murderer. Also, an escaped convict. This maturity generally doesn't extend further than that, but

[just_axe_me]

Five Movies Faith Has Cried At, Or, Would've Cried At Had Her Tear Ducts Cooperated

[egregiouslypink]

→ Finding Nemo. Shut the fuck up about her daddy issues, okay? Jesus. She's just happy the little fish didn't get turned into sushi or something.

→ Homeward Bound. No seriously, shut up. It's a good flick, and dogs are awesome. They fight a fucking bear, how badass is that?

→ Pocahontas. Come on, like anybody watches a Disney movie and expects it to end all shitty like that.

→ Gone With The Wind. The one time she didn't fuck up, she loses everything. And nobody believes she's figured her shit out. Faith can relate.

→ Glitter. If you had to watch that movie over and fucking over in prison, it'd make you cry too.

[just_axe_me]

[egregiouslypink]

...THAT IS THE BEST THING EVER OH MY GOD

[biverbam]

Five times Dawn actually liked being in Taxon/forgot that she was kidnapped in a creepy alien city and felt at home.

Five people Damon would really like to just eat goddamnit.

[egregiouslypink]

→ Angie. This is pretty much a sex thing, negl. LOOK, THE DUDE HAS CERTAIN KINKS THAT ARE KIND OF 'BITING PEOPLE WHILE FUCKING THEM'.

→ That Max chick. Unf.

→ Phone Sex Guy sounded tasty. And hey, sometimes a meal is just a meal.

→ Katherine so, p should have specified whether you meant oral sex or not.

→ Elena. HE CAN'T LIE. (Yes he can.)