Coping-ish
Still crying every night, but friends have been helping me feel better during the day.
FRIDAY-
Jessica and I went for a walk in the mall since it was raining outside. Each lap is a mile, so we did two laps, and then probably a 3rd mile when we went shopping. Jess said we had to get the two miles in before we could go in any stores, but I was so excited by stuff I saw that I kept forgetting and she had to keep reminding me LOL. To be fair though, she kept forgetting we needed to find her a blazer for an interview, so I kept her on track for that. :)
Later I threw together a deck for FNM at BC. Shane, Ken, and Brian showed up, which was pretty cool to see them again. Shane helped me test my crap deck, but mostly I just wanted to keep my mind busy. It worked until about round 3 when I started feeling depressed and had to leave early.
SATURDAY-
No walk this morning. Was totally going to, but I didn't have enough time after going to the bank and cleaning house before a friend I met on DoA came over for a trade and to do a face-up for me. Liz is actually really cool, and we've had similar circumstances with failed engagements due to insane guys, so she understood that I was a bit off-kilter today. I actually did quite well until around 11pm, when I was tired and the sadness was sinking in again.
After she left, I just broke down in wracking sobs. Yes, I can say wracking. My whole effing body convulsed while letting out guttural noises of emotional pain. Fortunately it was toned down to normal sobs by the time Tyler came back for another load of his crap, but I ended up having to run to the bathroom to puke from the crying. It was a bit embarrassing because I didn't know Khris was with him, so I'm sure I looked really pathetic. Especially since I popped blood vessels in my face and eyes, and now have to host "Featured Board Game" at 2pm like this.
FRIDAY-
Jessica and I went for a walk in the mall since it was raining outside. Each lap is a mile, so we did two laps, and then probably a 3rd mile when we went shopping. Jess said we had to get the two miles in before we could go in any stores, but I was so excited by stuff I saw that I kept forgetting and she had to keep reminding me LOL. To be fair though, she kept forgetting we needed to find her a blazer for an interview, so I kept her on track for that. :)
Later I threw together a deck for FNM at BC. Shane, Ken, and Brian showed up, which was pretty cool to see them again. Shane helped me test my crap deck, but mostly I just wanted to keep my mind busy. It worked until about round 3 when I started feeling depressed and had to leave early.
SATURDAY-
No walk this morning. Was totally going to, but I didn't have enough time after going to the bank and cleaning house before a friend I met on DoA came over for a trade and to do a face-up for me. Liz is actually really cool, and we've had similar circumstances with failed engagements due to insane guys, so she understood that I was a bit off-kilter today. I actually did quite well until around 11pm, when I was tired and the sadness was sinking in again.
After she left, I just broke down in wracking sobs. Yes, I can say wracking. My whole effing body convulsed while letting out guttural noises of emotional pain. Fortunately it was toned down to normal sobs by the time Tyler came back for another load of his crap, but I ended up having to run to the bathroom to puke from the crying. It was a bit embarrassing because I didn't know Khris was with him, so I'm sure I looked really pathetic. Especially since I popped blood vessels in my face and eyes, and now have to host "Featured Board Game" at 2pm like this.