(no subject)
I started this post with the intention of making it private, then I later decided that perhaps some of these things should be said anyway.
So it's damn near 2:00 AM and I still can't sleep, which sucks, because I have to be at work at 7:00 AM. Anyway, these are things that I've been wanting to tell you.
- You hurt me, but you already know that. I forgave you a long time ago, but I am getting over it at your expense. I know that I bring it up more often than I should and I'm sorry. I deal with things by playing my sense of humor. I don't really know any other way to explain it.
- When we talk on the phone, I know more often than not I am toying with the fact of our love. I know that you love me, you know that I love you. That's what's important and I forget that all the time and I make unnecessary jokes. You know what I'm talking about, and I apologize, because I know that gets on your nerves. It's like the same thing as when we were living together.
- You scare me when you talk the way you did last night. I don't know what it is you are going through because I'm not there. I can't help you because I don't know how, and you won't let me. I just need you to hang in there for me, you are my foundation. Without you, I cannot stand on my own.
- I want to see you again. One, because I miss you terribly. Two, because I want you to be able to see the tears in my eyes, the look on my face when I tell you that I love you. I want you know that this is something real and that I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make this work. I want you to see me without the angry words and hostilities. I want a day to make up for everything that has happened, to show you how things really are without the false pretenses.
So it's damn near 2:00 AM and I still can't sleep, which sucks, because I have to be at work at 7:00 AM. Anyway, these are things that I've been wanting to tell you.
- You hurt me, but you already know that. I forgave you a long time ago, but I am getting over it at your expense. I know that I bring it up more often than I should and I'm sorry. I deal with things by playing my sense of humor. I don't really know any other way to explain it.
- When we talk on the phone, I know more often than not I am toying with the fact of our love. I know that you love me, you know that I love you. That's what's important and I forget that all the time and I make unnecessary jokes. You know what I'm talking about, and I apologize, because I know that gets on your nerves. It's like the same thing as when we were living together.
- You scare me when you talk the way you did last night. I don't know what it is you are going through because I'm not there. I can't help you because I don't know how, and you won't let me. I just need you to hang in there for me, you are my foundation. Without you, I cannot stand on my own.
- I want to see you again. One, because I miss you terribly. Two, because I want you to be able to see the tears in my eyes, the look on my face when I tell you that I love you. I want you know that this is something real and that I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make this work. I want you to see me without the angry words and hostilities. I want a day to make up for everything that has happened, to show you how things really are without the false pretenses.