Reflection Before the Calm.
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I've been going through and reading all of my past journal entries including 2004 and halfway through 2005.
Honestly, where the hell did I go?
Or better yet, who the hell was I?
I decided to post a few "memories" or at least things that I thought were interesting to look back on
whether it was because I thought that for only being 15 I worded things well
or just for the simple fact that I am completely blown away.
I've taken a time machine back to 2004/5 and have been there for the past 2 hours.
Hot damn.
---------------------------------
04-02-05 (After coming back from Europe the second time).
When, Again?
when i'm sad, i get tired.
tired of all the things i don't want to think about, but
am forced to, in a way.
in the morning i can't think about things
and at night i can't either. it just doesn't make sense to me 5 hours after that.
is there any way to just hit a fast forward button on life?
or at this point, a pause.
just something to give me a breath of air.
some sort of relief, if only temporary.
i'm begging of you.
but the light is turned off
and there's a cold breeze coming through the cracked door
i'm losing my 49375th game of this.
so, when ... just when will something be good?
just tell me that.
---------------------------------
I've decided to start this journal over.
New new new.
And try and keep it the way it was when I first started.
You know it's really sad cus when I was reading it,
my life totally rocked and then I met cuntface AKA ashley
and my life completely went down the shitter
considering she is the biggest piece of shit ever.
It's sad, but at least almost everyone in DE knows
that she's a complete waste of time.
Hahahahahha.
Anywho- so my life was amazing in 2004/5
Then I met cuntface in August 2005 and was
utterly and completely trapped. Then she tried
to fuck this wonderful woman named Clare,
who fell in love with me since the moment
we locked eyes :] Karma's a bitch and I love it.
SO.
To end this entry...
I would like to start this journal off differently
and try to bring it back to the times before cuntface
cus those journal entries were funny and stupid
and they were amazing and you could tell I loved life
and it was before I was depressed cus cuntface ruined my life
and my life is now more than I could have ever expected it to be
and it's time to finally completely share that without the trailing
terrible past entries of late 05 to the start of 07 when I had had enough bullshit.
CHEERS!
___________________________________________________________________________________________
I've been going through and reading all of my past journal entries including 2004 and halfway through 2005.
Honestly, where the hell did I go?
Or better yet, who the hell was I?
I decided to post a few "memories" or at least things that I thought were interesting to look back on
whether it was because I thought that for only being 15 I worded things well
or just for the simple fact that I am completely blown away.
I've taken a time machine back to 2004/5 and have been there for the past 2 hours.
Hot damn.
---------------------------------
04-02-05 (After coming back from Europe the second time).
When, Again?
when i'm sad, i get tired.
tired of all the things i don't want to think about, but
am forced to, in a way.
in the morning i can't think about things
and at night i can't either. it just doesn't make sense to me 5 hours after that.
is there any way to just hit a fast forward button on life?
or at this point, a pause.
just something to give me a breath of air.
some sort of relief, if only temporary.
i'm begging of you.
but the light is turned off
and there's a cold breeze coming through the cracked door
i'm losing my 49375th game of this.
so, when ... just when will something be good?
just tell me that.
---------------------------------
I've decided to start this journal over.
New new new.
And try and keep it the way it was when I first started.
You know it's really sad cus when I was reading it,
my life totally rocked and then I met cuntface AKA ashley
and my life completely went down the shitter
considering she is the biggest piece of shit ever.
It's sad, but at least almost everyone in DE knows
that she's a complete waste of time.
Hahahahahha.
Anywho- so my life was amazing in 2004/5
Then I met cuntface in August 2005 and was
utterly and completely trapped. Then she tried
to fuck this wonderful woman named Clare,
who fell in love with me since the moment
we locked eyes :] Karma's a bitch and I love it.
SO.
To end this entry...
I would like to start this journal off differently
and try to bring it back to the times before cuntface
cus those journal entries were funny and stupid
and they were amazing and you could tell I loved life
and it was before I was depressed cus cuntface ruined my life
and my life is now more than I could have ever expected it to be
and it's time to finally completely share that without the trailing
terrible past entries of late 05 to the start of 07 when I had had enough bullshit.
CHEERS!
___________________________________________________________________________________________