More Pessimism
Dear Diary,
My dad is very much in danger of losing his job. There is a very real possibilty that he won't be able to find one in the States to replace it. Or anywhere else in the Gulf. If he is suddenly unemployed, I don't trust the financial aid office at CC to suddenly give assistance in the middle of the year. So I won't be able to afford to go to CC. Ironic, since I currently don't qualify for financial aid at an insanely expensive school.
I'm going to go lock myself in the bathroom and cry now. Well, I'd like to, but my mom is still awake. She is not emotionally stable enough to handle any negative emotions from me. Since she has to worry about me, my dad being alive, and my sister recovering from surgery.
Anyone who says that I have no reason or right to complain can go kill themselves.
What I want most in the entire world right now (aside from the health and safety of my friends and family) is to go home. Inshallah. Security considerations aside. I just want to go to the only real home I have and say a proper goodbye. I want to sit out on my balcony and watch the sunrise, feeling the warm air on my skin. Hear the call of the muezzin and watch a flock of parrots take flight from the palm tree in front of my house. Stuff myself on Indian food at the dining hall. Play on the playground in the Hills with Maddie on Friday evening with all the Saudi families. Walk on the scenic trails that weave through the golf course. Poke around Afghani antique stores and eat dripping, warm chicken shwarma while abaya-clad. Ride with Maddie on the merry-go-round at the Rashid mall that plays 'God Bless America' and assorted Sousa tunes. Drive through the desert, waving to the camels and go camping under the stars in one of the few spots on earth with no light pollution. Go diving in Yanbu. Sailing at Aramco's Dhahran beach. Sit in my favorite spot in the entire world atop the sand dune that lies on the far right side of Aramco's Sailing Beach, looking out onto the blue, blue waters of Half Moon Bay in the Gulf.
I pass on these articles to you, o reader.
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/06/03/international/middleeast/03EXPA.html?pagewanted=1
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/world/la-fg-dhahran6jun06,1,3831305.story?coll=la-headlines-world
My dad is very much in danger of losing his job. There is a very real possibilty that he won't be able to find one in the States to replace it. Or anywhere else in the Gulf. If he is suddenly unemployed, I don't trust the financial aid office at CC to suddenly give assistance in the middle of the year. So I won't be able to afford to go to CC. Ironic, since I currently don't qualify for financial aid at an insanely expensive school.
I'm going to go lock myself in the bathroom and cry now. Well, I'd like to, but my mom is still awake. She is not emotionally stable enough to handle any negative emotions from me. Since she has to worry about me, my dad being alive, and my sister recovering from surgery.
Anyone who says that I have no reason or right to complain can go kill themselves.
What I want most in the entire world right now (aside from the health and safety of my friends and family) is to go home. Inshallah. Security considerations aside. I just want to go to the only real home I have and say a proper goodbye. I want to sit out on my balcony and watch the sunrise, feeling the warm air on my skin. Hear the call of the muezzin and watch a flock of parrots take flight from the palm tree in front of my house. Stuff myself on Indian food at the dining hall. Play on the playground in the Hills with Maddie on Friday evening with all the Saudi families. Walk on the scenic trails that weave through the golf course. Poke around Afghani antique stores and eat dripping, warm chicken shwarma while abaya-clad. Ride with Maddie on the merry-go-round at the Rashid mall that plays 'God Bless America' and assorted Sousa tunes. Drive through the desert, waving to the camels and go camping under the stars in one of the few spots on earth with no light pollution. Go diving in Yanbu. Sailing at Aramco's Dhahran beach. Sit in my favorite spot in the entire world atop the sand dune that lies on the far right side of Aramco's Sailing Beach, looking out onto the blue, blue waters of Half Moon Bay in the Gulf.
I pass on these articles to you, o reader.
http://www.nytimes.com/2004/06/03/international/middleeast/03EXPA.html?pagewanted=1
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/world/la-fg-dhahran6jun06,1,3831305.story?coll=la-headlines-world