(no subject)
Seeing him without talking to him is like living without breathing. I don't know how this is supposed to work. We exchanged a sentence last night, so that's progress.
I had a little breakdown Saturday night. I cried for about two hours, and I was drunk, and it was terrible, and I cried about everything. I cried about the stupid bunny. I cried about moving, about being a Lutheran in a Catholic state. And D just laid there, patting my back, pushing back my hair, insisted that I talk to him about the hard stuff, even though I don't want to and it's weird.
When it's just us, it feels right, but at the house, I just feel weird, like an imposter. It's hard for me to separate my feelings for him and my distress over the whole situation. When we went camping, everything felt perfect. But once we got back to the house, I wanted to be nowhere near him.
Two months ten days. . .
I had a little breakdown Saturday night. I cried for about two hours, and I was drunk, and it was terrible, and I cried about everything. I cried about the stupid bunny. I cried about moving, about being a Lutheran in a Catholic state. And D just laid there, patting my back, pushing back my hair, insisted that I talk to him about the hard stuff, even though I don't want to and it's weird.
When it's just us, it feels right, but at the house, I just feel weird, like an imposter. It's hard for me to separate my feelings for him and my distress over the whole situation. When we went camping, everything felt perfect. But once we got back to the house, I wanted to be nowhere near him.
Two months ten days. . .