lkghaosihou;hn;slkejf
The title is exactly how I feel....hard to put into words but can be summed up easily by slamming my fists on the keyboard.
The guy I mentioned, or should I say, gushed over, in the previous post.... well...blah.
My friend Becca wanted to tell him that I liked him...I figured he already knew, since I made it pretty freaking obvious. I told her she could do whatever she wanted--but had an inkling that he didn't feel the same way.
Which wasn't exactly true. She had a long talk with him on Monday. It turns out that he noticed that I might have feelings for him, and considered asking me out. She told me he was really flattered, and I had "beautiful Italian eyes", and we had a lot in common, blah, blah blah...
But he recently got back together with his ex. Apparently she is the girl he is going to spend the rest of his life with.
*snarls* So I'm feeling a bit bitter. It happens so rarely that I like somebody, and when things don't work out (do they ever?) I feel so--hopeless. I'm sick of being alone, but I'm so picky that I feel it is my fault.
This episode has made me feel less attractive...I look in the mirror and am not as satisfied as I usually am...not thin enough, not put together enough.
And the few guys I have put my hopes on have found long term partners, perhaps girls to be with forever. I feel like the never girl.
Wow. This is depressing. My pessimism has just increased a few more notches.
I ran into him a couple times, and lord, was it awkward. He came to movie night, and everything was pretty normal, except I sat on the opposite side of the room, instead of right next to him. And I didn't react to his comments or jokes. Before when I was around him I would try and do anything to make him smile--oh man, it made me melt! Now when I'm around him I transform into Lindsey the Ice Queen.
Whatever.
Enough of that crap.
Onto a happier note!
I interviewed for the Disney College Program again...hopefully I'll get in again, and won't have to turn it down! :D It will be the excitement I've been longing for...for a LONG time. I'll know in about one or two weeks. *crosses fingers*
And....Harry Potter!!!!! I have tickets for the midnight showing the minute it comes out! HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME.
Getting an early night's rest...looking forward to a morning spent working on my art project.
Goodnight moon.
The guy I mentioned, or should I say, gushed over, in the previous post.... well...blah.
My friend Becca wanted to tell him that I liked him...I figured he already knew, since I made it pretty freaking obvious. I told her she could do whatever she wanted--but had an inkling that he didn't feel the same way.
Which wasn't exactly true. She had a long talk with him on Monday. It turns out that he noticed that I might have feelings for him, and considered asking me out. She told me he was really flattered, and I had "beautiful Italian eyes", and we had a lot in common, blah, blah blah...
But he recently got back together with his ex. Apparently she is the girl he is going to spend the rest of his life with.
*snarls* So I'm feeling a bit bitter. It happens so rarely that I like somebody, and when things don't work out (do they ever?) I feel so--hopeless. I'm sick of being alone, but I'm so picky that I feel it is my fault.
This episode has made me feel less attractive...I look in the mirror and am not as satisfied as I usually am...not thin enough, not put together enough.
And the few guys I have put my hopes on have found long term partners, perhaps girls to be with forever. I feel like the never girl.
Wow. This is depressing. My pessimism has just increased a few more notches.
I ran into him a couple times, and lord, was it awkward. He came to movie night, and everything was pretty normal, except I sat on the opposite side of the room, instead of right next to him. And I didn't react to his comments or jokes. Before when I was around him I would try and do anything to make him smile--oh man, it made me melt! Now when I'm around him I transform into Lindsey the Ice Queen.
Whatever.
Enough of that crap.
Onto a happier note!
I interviewed for the Disney College Program again...hopefully I'll get in again, and won't have to turn it down! :D It will be the excitement I've been longing for...for a LONG time. I'll know in about one or two weeks. *crosses fingers*
And....Harry Potter!!!!! I have tickets for the midnight showing the minute it comes out! HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME.
Getting an early night's rest...looking forward to a morning spent working on my art project.
Goodnight moon.