AU #666: A TINGE OF DOUBT CROSSES MY MIND

[halfcocked]

[sprawled on Hakuren's bed with his laptop, dicking around on Google again; without preamble, begins to read in an attempt at a silky voice:]

I dream'd this mortal part of mine

Comments

[a_holy_oak]

Are you at this again?

[halfcocked]

You're a geek, so I have to get you horny in geeky ways.

[a_holy_oak]

Reading poetry's never worked for you before, you know.

[halfcocked]

Not even a little, huh . . .

[a_holy_oak]

You don't need to exaggerate so much, it makes you sound silly.

[halfcocked]

What do you mean, exaggerate--I didn't write this! I wouldn't write something that retarded!

[a_holy_oak]

The way you're saying it -- what's wth that tone of voice?

[halfcocked]

What tone of voice? I wasn't using a tone of voice, was I?

[a_holy_oak]

You were completely exaggerating. It was pretty obvious.

[halfcocked]

Well it doesn't work unless you sound sexy, I was just making my voice sound, you know . . .

[clicking onto another site]

[a_holy_oak]

... I see.

[it sounds totally different, though]

[halfcocked]

It uh, it didn't work, it didn't turn you on?

"Friar Philip's Geese," what kind of pervert writes a sex poem about geese??

[a_holy_oak]

Why would it do that? Especially not in that ridiculous tone of voice ...

[halfcocked]

It just seemed like the sort of thing you'd get off on, you nerd! "Devit, you're so romantic and intellectual and shit, take off my pants . . . "

[opens another poem and clears his throat, DROPPING THE SEXY VOICE]

Their Sex Life

One failure on
Top of another

[halfcocked]

. . . I thought these were supposed to be sexy!

[a_holy_oak]

...

[and yet, somehow, it seems fitting ...]