(no subject)
hang in there baby
every gray cloud has a silver lining
good things happen to those who wait
if at first you don't succeed, try try again
hang in there baby
hang in there baby
hang in there baby
i wish telling myself these things did something. i wish i could shake my cynicism. i wish lonliness wasn't this hard to bear. i wish i was tough as nails, skin thick as cast iron. i wish i didn't secretly/not so secretly despise people in love on the street/in the store/on the train/ everywhere in my life as of recent. i wish my patience wasn't worn so thin. i wish i could run away and forget. i wish i didn't feel so insane. i wish i didn't have to partake in the everyday battle between feeling worthless and trying to convince myself im priceless. i wish i didn't still love you so much yet know it will never be able to work. i wish that my happiness didn't depend so much on the silliest most lame crap. i wish i could be the girl i was a few months back, with a backbone and with hopes and dreams of a great start in new york...instead of the rocky one ive had.
if it were not for the friends and family who love me, who i appreciate and can never truly prove how much because there are not actions and there aren't words.....i would not have this hope that i still try hard to feel positive about and to hold on to as if my life depended on it.
because i think a lot does depend on keeping hope.
so im trying.
im hanging in there.