there are things in life that you like, and things that you hate...
so today i stayed home from school. i'm swolen up like a chipmunk (i had oral surgery yesterday. i'm really starting to hate it) haha. the joy from stayin home is just totally killed by the anxiety of make up work. sheesh.
well i guess you could say i'm having a little bit of a struggle. just kinda one of those moments when you wanna do something but you can't. well in this case, i wish i could change my birth order. i'm starting to not like being in the middle. and no this is not one of those "woe is me, no one ever pays attention to me" pity parties.
it basically comes down to this: i have friends at school and friends outside of school (from a number of places) some of my best friends outside of school aren't my age. (well most aren't) and this has been totally ok. i mean it's not weird or anything, i get along with those people fine. but i see how they act around people older than me and then those who are younger...and it's different. you see, people who are older than me and around their age will of course have a better relationship because they're peers. and those who are younger get that whole "little sibling" relationship. and for those my age, it's just awkward. i mean i dont wanna act younger and acting older is just a bad way of trying to fix it. so until then i guess i just won't be as close to those people as i'd like to be. it's just hard to admit that and move on.
well i guess you could say i'm having a little bit of a struggle. just kinda one of those moments when you wanna do something but you can't. well in this case, i wish i could change my birth order. i'm starting to not like being in the middle. and no this is not one of those "woe is me, no one ever pays attention to me" pity parties.
it basically comes down to this: i have friends at school and friends outside of school (from a number of places) some of my best friends outside of school aren't my age. (well most aren't) and this has been totally ok. i mean it's not weird or anything, i get along with those people fine. but i see how they act around people older than me and then those who are younger...and it's different. you see, people who are older than me and around their age will of course have a better relationship because they're peers. and those who are younger get that whole "little sibling" relationship. and for those my age, it's just awkward. i mean i dont wanna act younger and acting older is just a bad way of trying to fix it. so until then i guess i just won't be as close to those people as i'd like to be. it's just hard to admit that and move on.