Blowing Dudes
Hey all, it's been awhile since I rapped at ya, but I been real busy.
Christ, I already "waste" (I use quotes because, really, I don't think it's THAT much of a waste. Could I be learning how to paint or play the guitar? Write poems? Sext pictures of my schlong in various hilarious positions, like as a watch wrapped around my wrist or nestled in the crevice of a hot dog bun or painted up like a Rebel Fleet Trooper from Star Wars? Read? Volunteer? Become a more educated, dedicated member of my community? Well, yeah, duh; however, I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with being enthused by sports and spending one's free time enjoying it, though the corporate presence/influence/grip it has on every major sport is a total downer, but that's a different topic entirely) too much time watching baseball and hockey, but the Internerd is abuzz with the news that LeBron James is returning to the Cleveland Cavaliers. I don't have the time, energy, or desire, really, to get into basketball, but I think it's cool that the best basketball player on the planet decided to return to play for Cleveland.
It's been said a million times already, but he left the Cavs like a total pud and many were more upset about having our city/region embarrassed on national television (which is how I felt). Most young people would jump at the opportunity to live and work in a city like Miami, Florida, regardless of where they were born and raised. Most people complain about Ohio's weather, especially during the winter months, and claim that they are going to move to a warmer climate. Now imagine that you're in your mid-20s, you're currently the basketball player on the planet (and arguably one of the best in your sport's history), you have spent your entire life in Akron and entire professional career to that point 40 minutes north of your hometown, and you could bed Victoria's Secret models and wantonly jizz all over $10,000 bills without even putting a dent in your net worth. Why the fuck wouldn't you move to a place if afforded the opportunity? I mean, as a younger man I moved to Seoul, South Korea and Chicago, Illinois, and I couldn't even afford to jizz in a Turkish lira.
Now, I have a sneaking suspicion that LeBron James' announcement to Sports Illustrated was either entirely or largely crafted by a PR firm, but so the fuck what? Even with those suspicions while I was initially reading it, it still hit me pretty hard and I felt like the sentiment was true, even if they weren't his exact words. Will this cause me to fully jump on the bandwagon? A little, yeah. I'll definitely watch his first game back in Cleveland (and maybe the first game or two if they open the season on the road), but I don't think I can really commit to them until they get deep into the playoffs (which, on paper, it looks like they may be poised to do, especially if the Kevin Love-to-Cleveland-while-the-Cavs-retain-Andrew Wiggins rumors come true). I don't care much about basketball or football, but I really love my city and Northeast Ohio in general. I love that this will be a boon to our local economy. I love the thought of one of our professional sports teams ending our championship drought. And, despite the fact that I enjoy living in a "hidden gem," I love how LeBron James' return validates how great this region is to the rest of the country.
Live responsibly and lovingly. Be positive and creative. You're beautiful. Peace.
Yours, etc.,
<3dane
xoxo
P.S. The song "Held Hostage" by Texas hardcore band Some Nerve really blows my pubic hair back.
Christ, I already "waste" (I use quotes because, really, I don't think it's THAT much of a waste. Could I be learning how to paint or play the guitar? Write poems? Sext pictures of my schlong in various hilarious positions, like as a watch wrapped around my wrist or nestled in the crevice of a hot dog bun or painted up like a Rebel Fleet Trooper from Star Wars? Read? Volunteer? Become a more educated, dedicated member of my community? Well, yeah, duh; however, I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with being enthused by sports and spending one's free time enjoying it, though the corporate presence/influence/grip it has on every major sport is a total downer, but that's a different topic entirely) too much time watching baseball and hockey, but the Internerd is abuzz with the news that LeBron James is returning to the Cleveland Cavaliers. I don't have the time, energy, or desire, really, to get into basketball, but I think it's cool that the best basketball player on the planet decided to return to play for Cleveland.
It's been said a million times already, but he left the Cavs like a total pud and many were more upset about having our city/region embarrassed on national television (which is how I felt). Most young people would jump at the opportunity to live and work in a city like Miami, Florida, regardless of where they were born and raised. Most people complain about Ohio's weather, especially during the winter months, and claim that they are going to move to a warmer climate. Now imagine that you're in your mid-20s, you're currently the basketball player on the planet (and arguably one of the best in your sport's history), you have spent your entire life in Akron and entire professional career to that point 40 minutes north of your hometown, and you could bed Victoria's Secret models and wantonly jizz all over $10,000 bills without even putting a dent in your net worth. Why the fuck wouldn't you move to a place if afforded the opportunity? I mean, as a younger man I moved to Seoul, South Korea and Chicago, Illinois, and I couldn't even afford to jizz in a Turkish lira.
Now, I have a sneaking suspicion that LeBron James' announcement to Sports Illustrated was either entirely or largely crafted by a PR firm, but so the fuck what? Even with those suspicions while I was initially reading it, it still hit me pretty hard and I felt like the sentiment was true, even if they weren't his exact words. Will this cause me to fully jump on the bandwagon? A little, yeah. I'll definitely watch his first game back in Cleveland (and maybe the first game or two if they open the season on the road), but I don't think I can really commit to them until they get deep into the playoffs (which, on paper, it looks like they may be poised to do, especially if the Kevin Love-to-Cleveland-while-the-Cavs-retain-Andrew Wiggins rumors come true). I don't care much about basketball or football, but I really love my city and Northeast Ohio in general. I love that this will be a boon to our local economy. I love the thought of one of our professional sports teams ending our championship drought. And, despite the fact that I enjoy living in a "hidden gem," I love how LeBron James' return validates how great this region is to the rest of the country.
Live responsibly and lovingly. Be positive and creative. You're beautiful. Peace.
Yours, etc.,
<3dane
xoxo
P.S. The song "Held Hostage" by Texas hardcore band Some Nerve really blows my pubic hair back.