Personalities...
So, I ended up finding a few pictures I had manipulated that represented some personalities that I talked about with my counselor Kyle back when I was last in this weird state of happiness and depression...going back and forth. I ended up remembering that I had finally figured out the remaining two last semester and I decided to finish the small set and I guess looking through them I'm feeling like I'm going to get through this and I know I will. I just for my own sakes I'm putting them over from oldest to youngest personalities.
Little Miss. Purple
She is the most mature of the group of my personalities. Little Miss. Purple is able to think logically and is very understanding. She is a little older than I am and she can weigh the pros and cons of my own actions and actions that have occurred. She is extremely organized and and is often the one keeping me in check with everything. Sometimes she takes on a role of a secretary. She will often be the one deciding to eat healthier food or smaller portions of large meals. She makes me stay to my studies and reminds me that an education is always a good thing to have.
Little Miss. Red
Little Miss. Red is like a little demon who likes to play innocent. Well, she's not actually a little devil or a little demon, but she is very mischevious and likes to take chances. She also likes to go behind Little Miss. Purple's back and do things that Little Miss. Purple disapproves of.
Often times Little Miss. Red likes to take advantage of any sexual occassions if her interest is perked. She will be known to mess around with the work Little Miss. Purple has done, but she is not like Little Miss. Blue making a mess out of it all. Instead, Little Miss. Red just likes to make sure I've got a reason to say that I am living my life. There are times when Little Miss. Purple can't help but accept some of Little Miss. Red's actions and let's her make some of the decisions.
Little Miss. Gold
Little Miss. Gold loves anything that is cliche in a relationship. She enjoys daydreaming up scenarios of romance. However, she doesn't dream up any sexual romance thoughts. The mere idea of sex makes her flustered and she can't keep a straight face. So she only likes to think of cliche romantic scenarios, hoping they actually happen if she thinks hard enough. Out of all of all the personalities, Little Miss. Gold is the one that holds on to my heart. She does not give it out easily because she does not want it to be broken. The last Little Miss. Gold wants to happen to me is have a broken heart...or at least another one because it's been broken once already and she had a very difficult time putting it back together and became even more protective of my heart.
There are times that Little Miss. Gold will tell Little Miss. Red about her dreams and often times Little Miss. Red will take those and distort them to an extent, haha. Little Miss. Gold gets embarrassed when Little Miss. Red then tells her those distorted dreams.
Little Miss. Pink
She usually enjoys having fun and is easily entertained. She loves laughing and having a good time by herself or with others. She enjoys playing games and doing unusual hobbies for her age...such as crossstitching. She is also the one who loves PIXAR so much and enjoys watching PIXAR films over and over again. She has the innocent heart of a child and is often times guillible to anything she hears.
Before Little Miss. Pink gets to know someone new, she is often quiet and shy. Once she feels comfortable, she turns into the talkative personality that sometimes needs to be shut up.
Little Miss. Blue
Meet the little brat who is best known for causing my own depression. She causes me much trouble because she acts like a three-year old (and is three years old) and is an attention whore. She has no logical thinking process and will convince me of every doubt I have. Even though she is only three, she creates much chaos in my own mind and can manipulate any situation when give the chance. She hungers for power and if she gets the chance at it, she usually brings on my depression and makes my own life a living hell. She will even cause me to hate those around me so much that I end up pushing away some of the closest people I know. Usually the ones above are welcome to come and go as they please or when the occassion is best suited for them, but Little Miss. Blue is the one that I won't let come and go as easily. There's a very good reason I make every effort to keep her locked in the darkest closet of myself.
So yea. The past several weeks I have been neglecting these personalities because I guess a part of myself felt like I shouldn't acknowledge them. Maybe hanging out with people like Kevin who think that the idea of multiple personalities is so absurd I felt like I had to think the same just so he wouldn't criticize me as well. Out of everyone here at school, Billy's the only one I have openly told about my personalities because she has her own as well. If I acknowledged them then I'd be admitting that I'm crazy or something. I don't normally have multiple personalities like those with a serious case of it. I have all of these personalities working together as a whole (without Little Miss. Blue) to be who I am most of the time. Each personality is just a facet of who I am and is not it's own separate individual. However, Little Miss. Blue is the only facet of myself that I don't let have a large influence on me like the others. Many of my friends know each one with the exception of Little Miss. Blue as well. Some people may know certain personalities better than the others, but that's just dependent from person to person. Well, as things have been going, there has been something seriously wrong and I guess tonight I finally got past that lack of acknowledgment problem. That, yes I do have my own problems but if this is the reason why I've been having the hardest time coping with everything, then I do need it. I need to acknowledge each personality and make my best efforts to keep away Little Miss. Blue. I need to get back Little Miss. Purple, Gold, Red, and Pink. So I'm going to try this whole thing again like I did five years ago. I'm acknowledging these personalities and I'm going to remind myself that I'm going to make it through all of this.
Little Miss. Purple
She is the most mature of the group of my personalities. Little Miss. Purple is able to think logically and is very understanding. She is a little older than I am and she can weigh the pros and cons of my own actions and actions that have occurred. She is extremely organized and and is often the one keeping me in check with everything. Sometimes she takes on a role of a secretary. She will often be the one deciding to eat healthier food or smaller portions of large meals. She makes me stay to my studies and reminds me that an education is always a good thing to have.
Little Miss. Red
Little Miss. Red is like a little demon who likes to play innocent. Well, she's not actually a little devil or a little demon, but she is very mischevious and likes to take chances. She also likes to go behind Little Miss. Purple's back and do things that Little Miss. Purple disapproves of.
Often times Little Miss. Red likes to take advantage of any sexual occassions if her interest is perked. She will be known to mess around with the work Little Miss. Purple has done, but she is not like Little Miss. Blue making a mess out of it all. Instead, Little Miss. Red just likes to make sure I've got a reason to say that I am living my life. There are times when Little Miss. Purple can't help but accept some of Little Miss. Red's actions and let's her make some of the decisions.
Little Miss. Gold
Little Miss. Gold loves anything that is cliche in a relationship. She enjoys daydreaming up scenarios of romance. However, she doesn't dream up any sexual romance thoughts. The mere idea of sex makes her flustered and she can't keep a straight face. So she only likes to think of cliche romantic scenarios, hoping they actually happen if she thinks hard enough. Out of all of all the personalities, Little Miss. Gold is the one that holds on to my heart. She does not give it out easily because she does not want it to be broken. The last Little Miss. Gold wants to happen to me is have a broken heart...or at least another one because it's been broken once already and she had a very difficult time putting it back together and became even more protective of my heart.
There are times that Little Miss. Gold will tell Little Miss. Red about her dreams and often times Little Miss. Red will take those and distort them to an extent, haha. Little Miss. Gold gets embarrassed when Little Miss. Red then tells her those distorted dreams.
Little Miss. Pink
She usually enjoys having fun and is easily entertained. She loves laughing and having a good time by herself or with others. She enjoys playing games and doing unusual hobbies for her age...such as crossstitching. She is also the one who loves PIXAR so much and enjoys watching PIXAR films over and over again. She has the innocent heart of a child and is often times guillible to anything she hears.
Before Little Miss. Pink gets to know someone new, she is often quiet and shy. Once she feels comfortable, she turns into the talkative personality that sometimes needs to be shut up.
Little Miss. Blue
Meet the little brat who is best known for causing my own depression. She causes me much trouble because she acts like a three-year old (and is three years old) and is an attention whore. She has no logical thinking process and will convince me of every doubt I have. Even though she is only three, she creates much chaos in my own mind and can manipulate any situation when give the chance. She hungers for power and if she gets the chance at it, she usually brings on my depression and makes my own life a living hell. She will even cause me to hate those around me so much that I end up pushing away some of the closest people I know. Usually the ones above are welcome to come and go as they please or when the occassion is best suited for them, but Little Miss. Blue is the one that I won't let come and go as easily. There's a very good reason I make every effort to keep her locked in the darkest closet of myself.
So yea. The past several weeks I have been neglecting these personalities because I guess a part of myself felt like I shouldn't acknowledge them. Maybe hanging out with people like Kevin who think that the idea of multiple personalities is so absurd I felt like I had to think the same just so he wouldn't criticize me as well. Out of everyone here at school, Billy's the only one I have openly told about my personalities because she has her own as well. If I acknowledged them then I'd be admitting that I'm crazy or something. I don't normally have multiple personalities like those with a serious case of it. I have all of these personalities working together as a whole (without Little Miss. Blue) to be who I am most of the time. Each personality is just a facet of who I am and is not it's own separate individual. However, Little Miss. Blue is the only facet of myself that I don't let have a large influence on me like the others. Many of my friends know each one with the exception of Little Miss. Blue as well. Some people may know certain personalities better than the others, but that's just dependent from person to person. Well, as things have been going, there has been something seriously wrong and I guess tonight I finally got past that lack of acknowledgment problem. That, yes I do have my own problems but if this is the reason why I've been having the hardest time coping with everything, then I do need it. I need to acknowledge each personality and make my best efforts to keep away Little Miss. Blue. I need to get back Little Miss. Purple, Gold, Red, and Pink. So I'm going to try this whole thing again like I did five years ago. I'm acknowledging these personalities and I'm going to remind myself that I'm going to make it through all of this.