snowed in and thinking many thoughts
I’ve been devouring "A Writer’s Tale: The Final Chapter" today. This book is completely fascinating. Off and on reading has gotten me about to the middle of chapter three (gregariously title "Bastards", which I love) and, I wonder, is reading other people’s corresponding e-mails supposed to be this enthralling? Well, I suppose it would in some fashion no matter what. People are just interesting.
You would think, aw hell, that RTD. He’s a big-name writer now. He’s got his shit together, all his ducks in a row, while I, on the other hand, am complete crap and cannot write cohesive enough to string two words together or make deadlines because they scare me and life in general sucks really bad. Sometimes, and anyone would feel as such no matter the profession I suppose, we are so inclined as to believe we are the only person in the whole of creation with these so many feelings. Namely, I am the only writer in the universe who can spend an obscene amount of time actually avoiding what I love doing because of insecurities, etc, etc.
I cannot tell you how much I just laughed-at myself, mind you-at RTD’s almost pitiful monologues on missing deadlines and generally being very moody about his writing that I wholly understood.
I suppose it’d be a bit of a stretch to say (considering my small, pathetic track record) that my dream in life is to be an author. I don’t even care what, though I’m partial and have always loved Science Fiction. I just love the writing process. Maybe I should set myself deadlines to miss and panic about. It’s worked for me before. (To be fair to myself, I have two verses I’m working on, and a small number of other oneshot like things, and some original projects that are being neglected worse than the rest. What can I say? I like having things to think about. It’s why I can’t go to sleep before 2 in the morning.)
Theatrics aside (though never really out of mind) the latest conversation I’ve gotten to really struck a cord with me and made me actually write out my thoughts (which I’m horrible at and why my LJ posts are nonexistent [meaning I’ve meant to write a reaction post for Waters of Mars and End of Time but haven’t yet]). This “bastard” way of standing back and watching people react to situations as if fascinated by some research results? Good God I have done this my entire life! And this ramble comes full circle right back to just how fascinating people are.
And that I’m really, really loving this book. A lot.
You would think, aw hell, that RTD. He’s a big-name writer now. He’s got his shit together, all his ducks in a row, while I, on the other hand, am complete crap and cannot write cohesive enough to string two words together or make deadlines because they scare me and life in general sucks really bad. Sometimes, and anyone would feel as such no matter the profession I suppose, we are so inclined as to believe we are the only person in the whole of creation with these so many feelings. Namely, I am the only writer in the universe who can spend an obscene amount of time actually avoiding what I love doing because of insecurities, etc, etc.
I cannot tell you how much I just laughed-at myself, mind you-at RTD’s almost pitiful monologues on missing deadlines and generally being very moody about his writing that I wholly understood.
I suppose it’d be a bit of a stretch to say (considering my small, pathetic track record) that my dream in life is to be an author. I don’t even care what, though I’m partial and have always loved Science Fiction. I just love the writing process. Maybe I should set myself deadlines to miss and panic about. It’s worked for me before. (To be fair to myself, I have two verses I’m working on, and a small number of other oneshot like things, and some original projects that are being neglected worse than the rest. What can I say? I like having things to think about. It’s why I can’t go to sleep before 2 in the morning.)
Theatrics aside (though never really out of mind) the latest conversation I’ve gotten to really struck a cord with me and made me actually write out my thoughts (which I’m horrible at and why my LJ posts are nonexistent [meaning I’ve meant to write a reaction post for Waters of Mars and End of Time but haven’t yet]). This “bastard” way of standing back and watching people react to situations as if fascinated by some research results? Good God I have done this my entire life! And this ramble comes full circle right back to just how fascinating people are.
And that I’m really, really loving this book. A lot.