(no subject)
ok so hillary left sunday morning..jay & i had a big fight & kinda sorta made up..im still mad at him though, so he's on probation.....but that doesnt mean he cant take me & jen to see misery signals!!!! YEEESSSMMMM ERRRBODY!!! IM GON' SEE ME SOME MISERY SIGNAAAALLLSSSSSSSSS. ok so then nothing really happened on monday...& on tuesday i went to beacon with kristin to get our transcripts & was wierd being in beacon again..i said hi to my old advisor (too bad mr daniels isn't there anymore) & then the guidance counselor said hi to me..& then after that i walked all over the school & then we left & were walking towards the dmv on 34th & on 48th street i decided to get a tarot card readign & it was fucking freaky!! she got everything about my past & present right...& then she just said some crazy shit about my future but i dont wanna get into that cuz i dont wanna get pissed off again..all i know is that im gonna be keeping a close eye on my dad in august. ok so then she was like that i need healing blah blah blah so she asked for an extra $115 so that she can burn a candle for me but i just gave her like 20 dollars more & she gave me two amethyst stones & two quartz stones to put on my chakras....ok so after that kristin & i kept on walking & she also needed to see her mom for some important documents & all im gonng say is drama at her mom's job...so after thaaattt we went to my house & chilled for a while....
i've been talking to hillary also this week over the phone..i miss that girl & there are 29 days left...thats better than 30..cuz now since its in the twenties..i feel like its closer to the number 20 & it doesnt look like its that many days so yeah...
then yesterday...i went shopping with kristin i had fun & i got cute shirts & cute belts...& then i had a long conversation over the phone with jen & we're gonna hang out on friday..either go to one of two parties (or both if we have time) or to tj's to drink with matt & his friends.
this is my 4th day sober & jay thinks im having withdrawl symptoms in my sleep b/c some freaky shit happen & i really dont think its withdrawl...i was sleeping..& it was a really deeps sleep..& i remember i opened my eyes for a quick second & after i closed them all of a sudden it got really white & i saw a red dot zooming around...it was exactly like the red lasers that people use to point at other people...& i had this intense sensation that i was either being abducted or leaving my body cuz it felt like a magnetic force was pulling my soul or body away from earth..i dont know..i got really tense in my sleep i remember & i was scared...but it was like a sleepy type of scared...since i was sleeping i couldn't react to what i was feeling that quick..no that i think of it..i kinda think it might of been the gypsy that i saw the other day cuz she was like that she was gonna burn a candle for me & its a big candle with cold & crystal & titanium...so maybe that wierd episode in my dream might of had something to do with the candle burning...
um so yeah...thats life right now.
i've been talking to hillary also this week over the phone..i miss that girl & there are 29 days left...thats better than 30..cuz now since its in the twenties..i feel like its closer to the number 20 & it doesnt look like its that many days so yeah...
then yesterday...i went shopping with kristin i had fun & i got cute shirts & cute belts...& then i had a long conversation over the phone with jen & we're gonna hang out on friday..either go to one of two parties (or both if we have time) or to tj's to drink with matt & his friends.
this is my 4th day sober & jay thinks im having withdrawl symptoms in my sleep b/c some freaky shit happen & i really dont think its withdrawl...i was sleeping..& it was a really deeps sleep..& i remember i opened my eyes for a quick second & after i closed them all of a sudden it got really white & i saw a red dot zooming around...it was exactly like the red lasers that people use to point at other people...& i had this intense sensation that i was either being abducted or leaving my body cuz it felt like a magnetic force was pulling my soul or body away from earth..i dont know..i got really tense in my sleep i remember & i was scared...but it was like a sleepy type of scared...since i was sleeping i couldn't react to what i was feeling that quick..no that i think of it..i kinda think it might of been the gypsy that i saw the other day cuz she was like that she was gonna burn a candle for me & its a big candle with cold & crystal & titanium...so maybe that wierd episode in my dream might of had something to do with the candle burning...
um so yeah...thats life right now.