[He's fixing the screen for a moment before grinning real wide for the camera.]
Hello, folks! Robin here. I should have done this a few days ago when I first caught him, but better late than never, right?
I'd like everyone to meet....
[And he turns the gear to face a Spearow, who is currently pecking at the ground. But he looks up when Rob turns the
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Eridan. Like the tranquilizer or the star constellation? But interesting. Different, kind of strange, but interesting.
[And now he's trying to decide whether to :| at the whole angel rant or to laugh. And laugh really really hard. Since laughing has been a common theme so far, he might just continue. Only for a moment.]
While I would definitely love to know what your definition of 'someone like me' is, I'm a bit more interested in the fact you shoot down angels. You couldn't be any more creative? Really? I would assume that someone of your intelligence would have a little more creativity in the matter. But hey, that's just me.
[And he's going to hold off for a moment on the psychology behind what's happening - and yes he knows psychology, you kind of have to in order to begin to fight half of the villains in Gotham - for Eridan to finish.]
You really want to know what I think? [Raises his eyebrow slightly, but he continues before he can get a 'no'.]
I think you're lonely. Or maybe not even that, maybe you have plenty of friends or family or whatever you call them, but you seek out interaction - usually of the conflicting kind - because you want to interact with people. But you insult them because you're scared of being nice and getting close. Or maybe you're self-conscious, and you have to insult others to make yourself feel better, and by decimating someone else's resolve you think you win. But you don't, because you're still lonely, so you just move around from person to person until someone will give you the time and energy.
[And maybe he's totally just connecting this to the same psychology Batman taught him about why most villains will stick to very violent and loud crimes because they want someone to notice them. He could be totally off here, and he's definitely already coming up with four possible reactions as to how he'll react if he is wrong, but for now he's just going to stand there, kind of smug, and maybe even shrug slightly.]
But that's just what I think.
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[OH HOW RUDE, just gonna stare indignantly at that laughing, because obviously this guy is ignorant to the hard tasks he was saddled with.] You act like I had a choice in the matter.
[But then he explains and uh oops, is that a slight break in Eridan's own resolve. He stares for a second, looks away as his lips flatten to a thin line. Fuck, it'd be one thing if he was so wrong, but he wasn't, not entirely. But fuck if he's gonna let this human know that.]
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I giwe you points for how much you had to reach with that, but no. I merely treat those lower than me like the filth they are, simple as that.
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And you always have a choice, especially when it comes to mass homicide. But I'm no expert in that. I'd go talk to the Joker or Two Face, it's more of their forté.
[And there it is. The slight break, the look away. Oh Eridan, you don't seem to understand. Robin has spent his life trying to understand emotional reaction from Batman. No matter how good at hiding it you might be, you'll never be good enough. Not for this kid. He knows. Literally.]
Except that I wasn't reaching, was I? Dude, it's cool. I told you, I get it. You don't have to keep trying to cover it up. We can move on.
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And fuck your constellations, if anythin' it's been named after ME, what with hawin' created your planet and ewerythin'. Which goes fin in flipper with me killin' angels, you grubfucker. I was saddled with those challenges when I appeared on my planet when me and the rest a my--friends I suppose, got into the medium. So fuck Joker or Two Face or who ewer the fuck. They don't know me, or the challenges I faced.
[Now he's narrowing his eyes in an unamused glare.]
And you don't know me either. Stop actin' like you hawe a backstage fuckin' pass to my thin pan, because you fuckin' don't you arrogant shit!
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[And he quirks at eyebrow at this and smiles slightly. So he does have friends. Good to know. And the way he's talking...maybe he's one of those aliens Mirdori was talking about? Very interesting.]
Wait, so are you billions and billions of years old? Cause you look around my age, and dude, the stars are a little bit older than that. But I do like that term you used, grubfucker? Different, very portmanteau.
[He'll meet your unamused glare and raise you a cocky smirk and a raised eyebrow.]
That sounds strangely similar to a yes. But don't get too whelmed, man. It was just a good guess. Plus, if I'm arrogant, that means something I said offended you. So I was right?
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[The sad part is, that's true. He is exactly as important here as he was there... Which isn't nearly as important as he likes to believe he is.]
No, I'm 6 solar sweeps old, I don't know what a year is, or what that really translates into in sweeps, but I doubt it's a fuckin' billion anythin'. See, I was in paradox space when your planet was created.
...Is it normal for you humans to compliment someone when they insult you? [Because uh.. Why do you keep doing that |:]
[But that eyebrow just makes him scowl.]
Just because you act like a arrogant little asshole doesn't mean you got anythin' CLOSE to bein' correct, it just means you're impertinent as the rest a your race is prowin' to be.
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Paradox space? What's that?
And dude, I don't have a problem with you, so of course I'll compliment when compliments are called for. [Shrug.] Why, does it bother you? [Cause if it does, he'll probably keep doing it.]
And okay, okay, we can move on. [This is reaching Batman!levels of emotional denial here. He'll need to take baby steps.] Are you the only one of your..."race" here?
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I really don't owe you any explanations and it's a really long story to ewen explain what that is.
[God Robin, he merely can't be assed to do it.]
Hmmm... It doesn't really bother me, just kinda fuckin' weird is all. But as for my race, which I'm a Troll by the way, no I'm not there's... Six--No, sewen a the remain' twelwe here, eight includin' me, or at least that I know of.
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[And he makes a note that Eridan most definitely did not ask him to stop.]
[Wait. Just...wait. Troll? Really? Rob definitely has to hold back another laugh.] So are these your friends?
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Fine, if you're THAT set on findin' out, me and elewen a my friends played this game that sorta destroyed our planet and wiped out the rest a our race, while we were safely in the medium. We fuckin' beat the game and it created us a new planet to be the gods of, Earth is that planet just so ya know, but before we could come down on you pathetic humans like the rightful gods we were suppose to be, it kinda got snatched from us by some fuckin' anomaly or what hawe you. So the twelwe a us hawe been hidin' like downright cowards on a fuckin' rock in paradox space, which is basically a place that time doesn't rule ower, at least not your time, it has its own kinda, seein' as we only hawe a few hours before all a us are goin' to fuckin' die or whatewer.
But there, fuckin' happy?
[After that explanation, he just kinda nods.] Yeah, you could say that, they're the aforementioned friends, though to be quite fuckin' honest, I do hate some of them.
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Huh, well that is indeed interesting. So you destroyed your world with a game but won at the end so you became gods of another world, except that someone or somthing stole the game from you so you got left in paradox space? Just to make sure I got it all straight.
And yes, thank you very much. [Pleased!smile]
Ahh, so you've got a few you like, a few you don't like. I wouldn't consider them all friends, but that's just me. [Shrug.]
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Fan-fuckin'-tastic, you CAN listen. Brawo, you aren't as stupid as you look.
[Flat look.] I was usin' friend loosely, but hawe you newer heard a hate-friends before?
[Because... can't you feel it Robin? This hate-friendship blooming between the two of you?]
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Why Eridan, if I didn't know you better I'd call that a compliment.
You have a point there, I guess I have.
[Can you feel the love hate tonight~?]
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Yeah, don't look too much into it--uh, fuck you actually newer told me your fuckin' name.
[Squint! How rude, and here Eridan introduced himself! Way to be fucking impolite and not introduce yourself!]
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[And that just makes him smirk a bit.]
It's Robin.
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