Disappointments
Life is filled with disappointments... Big ones, small ones, some you can brush off and others that'll keep you awake at night... I guess there are some that leads people to do the unspeakable, it changes your life and while most are disappointments you can deal with, others can make you do drastic things...
Like most disappointments, one learn to live with it although each time one experiences disappointments, it leaves a little scar... So what happens when you are filled with so many little scars that it looks like one big scar? Do you grit your teeth and bear with it or do you just end it all?
And it does make you wonder which is worse? To receive one big disappointment at once? Or receive multiple little cuts and bruises for a looooong period of time? And how does one guage their threshold of such thing? Can all disappointments be gotten over? Or we just learn to live with the pain?
Looking at the multiple faces on the street, I'm left to wonder how many scars are people carrying? Is the old lady sitting opposite me thinking about suicide? Or is that guy waiting at the bus stop really thinking about his lack or worth? And how does their pain compares to yours? I guess I'll never know...
People say that some things are beyond control and that we need to take things less personally... They sing 'que sera sera' and 'let it be', but are we just kidding ourselves by relinquishing all responsibilties? If you tried your best and things still don't turn out well, then is your best enuff or you just didn't push your threshold?
We read any students jumping off buildings becos they fail their exams and we think to ourselves 'why are they so dumb by dying for something so minute?' but did we try to stand in their shoes that maybe in their world, it was really everything to them? Or that the guy who stabbed his lover becos she cheated on him, you wonder 'people get over such thing, why did he have to do something so silly that'll put them in jail?' but did we realise that within his capacity, he could no longer take such a result?
They say as we grow older, we see things differently and that what we hold dear in our heart will seem meaningless to more important things... So should we totally dismiss what we hold dear today since I'll be meaningless anyway? And what if we never feel the things we were told that is important to be important? Did we really discard what is truly important within the capacity of us only to find that it is truly those things that define us?
People say everything happens for a reason but if the reason is a life of complete disappointment and pain, should you not just end it as soon as you can than to continually receive those cuts and bruises that pains you? What if you truly feel that happiness is something that does not happen to you? That peace of mind is only rationed to some people? What should you do? What IS the purpose of living? Should the legacy we leave behind be one of bitterness and pain? Or is the concept of legacy really a major fluke? Is Life a major fluke?
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