(no subject)
My livejournal buzz is dying.
i am definately not as into as i used to be.
i had this dream that i was back in new paltz high school last night.
i never thought i would say this, but i kinda, sorta miss it in some twisted way.
im lonely, and if i was in school at least i would be around people, even if it was the same old people. at least there would be some intrigue in my life, and maybe i would have more friends.
lets just face it.
ive lost connections. what once was is no longer and i feel like crying all the time. it's like i have pms 24/7. ive been crying at everything.
i just came back from a residency with my mom. i was in a hotel room all week, alone. it might sound great and nice, and yea it was, but it was also really lonely and painful. there i was, a 16 yr old. alone. with her mother. in the middle of some white-bread town, watching turner classic movies.
the biggest wish i have at the moment:
that i could go back in time and be ginger rogers. i love her, and fred astaire, and i want to go back in time. GOD I WANT TO BE AN OLD MOVIE STAR.
thats it.
i am definately not as into as i used to be.
i had this dream that i was back in new paltz high school last night.
i never thought i would say this, but i kinda, sorta miss it in some twisted way.
im lonely, and if i was in school at least i would be around people, even if it was the same old people. at least there would be some intrigue in my life, and maybe i would have more friends.
lets just face it.
ive lost connections. what once was is no longer and i feel like crying all the time. it's like i have pms 24/7. ive been crying at everything.
i just came back from a residency with my mom. i was in a hotel room all week, alone. it might sound great and nice, and yea it was, but it was also really lonely and painful. there i was, a 16 yr old. alone. with her mother. in the middle of some white-bread town, watching turner classic movies.
the biggest wish i have at the moment:
that i could go back in time and be ginger rogers. i love her, and fred astaire, and i want to go back in time. GOD I WANT TO BE AN OLD MOVIE STAR.
thats it.