Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?
Very abruptly, we have a house. It's a four-bedroom somewheres at Sunset and Boulder Highway. It's surrounded by factories and a scrap yard, and the houses are so close together that all you see out of the windows are the windows next door. (I'm still surprised that Joey and Brandon went for it, since they're so picky about location!) But I get my own bedroom-and that's all I ask for! We should be able to move within a month and I cannot wait!!!
I'm still jobless, and getting cabin fever over it. I hoped to get more music students and be done with it-but none of the inquiries have worked out. I still only have 3 students, even less than when I was working at Cili! I had 5!
Also feel creatively stifled. I blame the living situation. I've never been less productive than I have this year, and added with not having a job, and uncertainty about what to do with school-I'M GOING LIVID. I think what it all boils down to is uncertainty about the future. Although I want a simple part time job (so that way I can still look for more students) I also want something with direction. I look at my friends and boyfriend, and they're ON TRACK. I was always the one who instinctively knew what she wanted and where she was going. Friends and even their parents were surprised at my drive. Now just a couple years later I'm left behind. I'd hate to blame, but this Illegal Business has a lot to do with it. If not for it, I would be at college out-of-state (although I can't be too upset anymore, I'm happy here with my family and Andy.) But even getting a no-where job in Vegas will be more difficult.
I guess at 21 I shouldn't be so anxious. But still. I used to act like I knew everything. I kind of miss that blind confidence-haha.
I'm still jobless, and getting cabin fever over it. I hoped to get more music students and be done with it-but none of the inquiries have worked out. I still only have 3 students, even less than when I was working at Cili! I had 5!
Also feel creatively stifled. I blame the living situation. I've never been less productive than I have this year, and added with not having a job, and uncertainty about what to do with school-I'M GOING LIVID. I think what it all boils down to is uncertainty about the future. Although I want a simple part time job (so that way I can still look for more students) I also want something with direction. I look at my friends and boyfriend, and they're ON TRACK. I was always the one who instinctively knew what she wanted and where she was going. Friends and even their parents were surprised at my drive. Now just a couple years later I'm left behind. I'd hate to blame, but this Illegal Business has a lot to do with it. If not for it, I would be at college out-of-state (although I can't be too upset anymore, I'm happy here with my family and Andy.) But even getting a no-where job in Vegas will be more difficult.
I guess at 21 I shouldn't be so anxious. But still. I used to act like I knew everything. I kind of miss that blind confidence-haha.