I dont want to speak these words, cause I, I dont want to make things any worse
So I woke up early for a change and went to go talk to the guidance counseler...yea she isnt there today at all. So I drove over to moms and get her her drink then went to the bank and got all of that settled. I have been in the most annoying pain ever. I can hardly move, laying down and sitting is the worst. It's getting to the point where I cant take the pain much longer. If the pills that my back doc gave me doesnt work here soon i'm prolly gonna have to pay a visit to the hospital. My doctor and my mom really want me to get that surgery done but im not ready for it. I don't want to get out of shape while waiting for my back to heal. I love working out everyday it keeps me healthy and makes me feel good. I will miss gymnastics way too much and I prolly won't be able to coach:( I just wish these meds would kick in so I can breathe again and sorta move. I'm already pissed off that I can't go to practice tonight, not even to condition the doc said NO. This sucks it really does.
So I didnt realize until reading my LJ from last night how dumb it was too write that. I'm really not that down. Yeah I have my times, but who doesnt? I was only down because I realized what I was doing with my life is not going to get me anywhere. I'm dropping out of my Pre-cal class, hopefully start college classes here this spring quarter. I have stuff to look forward to. For instance; kicking ass at gymnastics meets, 3.5 months left of school, graduation, friends, spring break:), I just need to get over the fact that unlike other people I had to spend 5 yrs. in high school because of a lot of things. Not everyone can understand what I went through in High School. I don't even like to explain why to a lot of people. I'm sucking it up and going to get through this. I can do this on my own, I don't need any ass kickin' from people. Actually yeah I do sometimes lol. I'm doing this for me and no one else. This is my life and the only person that can make shit outta it. So with that positive booster I can smile more now and take a deep breath( well actually i cant breath deep or i will go into tears) I can get through this.
Things to look forward to...PIZZA AND OC NIGHT:) and talking to Keith
So I didnt realize until reading my LJ from last night how dumb it was too write that. I'm really not that down. Yeah I have my times, but who doesnt? I was only down because I realized what I was doing with my life is not going to get me anywhere. I'm dropping out of my Pre-cal class, hopefully start college classes here this spring quarter. I have stuff to look forward to. For instance; kicking ass at gymnastics meets, 3.5 months left of school, graduation, friends, spring break:), I just need to get over the fact that unlike other people I had to spend 5 yrs. in high school because of a lot of things. Not everyone can understand what I went through in High School. I don't even like to explain why to a lot of people. I'm sucking it up and going to get through this. I can do this on my own, I don't need any ass kickin' from people. Actually yeah I do sometimes lol. I'm doing this for me and no one else. This is my life and the only person that can make shit outta it. So with that positive booster I can smile more now and take a deep breath( well actually i cant breath deep or i will go into tears) I can get through this.
Things to look forward to...PIZZA AND OC NIGHT:) and talking to Keith