Weekend in Review
I spent the past 2 days with her in Chicago as we had scheduled to take Step 2 Clinical Skills together in May when we were still dating. Things went smoothly for the most part: on our free day, we visited Gino's East for some famous polenta-crust deep dish pizza, Millenium Park, the Chicago Art Institute, and the Signature Lounge on the 96th floor of the Hancock Observatory. We shared a king bed at a Holiday Inn Express without much ado. The following day, we struggled through and survived the 12 "standardized" patients and shared dinner at O'Hare before arriving back in Boston at midnight.
I told her that I'm getting used to the fact that she's no longer around, that she's no longer mine. I also revealed that the hardest part for me was that she was doing things that we used together, but now with someone else; I have to live with the fact that the next guy she dates could be The One, as all2swift used to say. The beast known as Jealousy is a terrible creature: any time she's text messaging, any time she's not responding to instant messages, any time she's unreachable by phone, I wonder if it's Him. It's getting easier to tell myself that she really has moved on (I didn't really give her much choice, regretfully), but the feelings of inadequacy compared to someone else is a tough one to swallow.
Damn, somebody tell me why the first girl I see when I walk up in the club is her (her)
N*gga you told me that you was gon' make sure I wasn't gon' see this girl, oh not tonight
I wanted to give it time, I wanted her off my mind
Now its too late to leave, damn
I wonder who that is she talkin' to
He put his drink down, now he's makin' a move
I wonder where they're movin' too
Just like a fool I'm watchin' her
tryin to make my eyes deter
But I cant stop watchin', I'm watchin'
See I cant stop watchin', I'm watchin'
...
Hey Girl, I didn't see ya standin there, it's been a
Long time, it's feelin' really good to see your smile
Every once in a while, I'm thinkin' of you and me-ee
But life is good, I'm free-ee, yea
Wait! Baby I'm frontin', honestly, I made a big mistake
I'm struggling with reality, it hurts more everyday
I been blaming you for makin' me feel this way
And now I'm crushed without your love
I told her that I'm getting used to the fact that she's no longer around, that she's no longer mine. I also revealed that the hardest part for me was that she was doing things that we used together, but now with someone else; I have to live with the fact that the next guy she dates could be The One, as all2swift used to say. The beast known as Jealousy is a terrible creature: any time she's text messaging, any time she's not responding to instant messages, any time she's unreachable by phone, I wonder if it's Him. It's getting easier to tell myself that she really has moved on (I didn't really give her much choice, regretfully), but the feelings of inadequacy compared to someone else is a tough one to swallow.
Damn, somebody tell me why the first girl I see when I walk up in the club is her (her)
N*gga you told me that you was gon' make sure I wasn't gon' see this girl, oh not tonight
I wanted to give it time, I wanted her off my mind
Now its too late to leave, damn
I wonder who that is she talkin' to
He put his drink down, now he's makin' a move
I wonder where they're movin' too
Just like a fool I'm watchin' her
tryin to make my eyes deter
But I cant stop watchin', I'm watchin'
See I cant stop watchin', I'm watchin'
...
Hey Girl, I didn't see ya standin there, it's been a
Long time, it's feelin' really good to see your smile
Every once in a while, I'm thinkin' of you and me-ee
But life is good, I'm free-ee, yea
Wait! Baby I'm frontin', honestly, I made a big mistake
I'm struggling with reality, it hurts more everyday
I been blaming you for makin' me feel this way
And now I'm crushed without your love