Whither go I from here?
As my life has been greatly upheaved over the course of the last two months I have been caused to consider a great many things in my life. For the first time in over ten years I am able to think about decisions and choices without heed for any other person. Of course that isn't entirely realized just yet-there are still many things which are still "us", and not "me". There, I think, is where the truth lies. Who am I?
For over ten years I have been Lauren's boyfriend, fiancé, and finally husband. Early on I was someone, in and of myself, but before much time had passed I had become half of an us, and no longer an "I". But now that us is sundered (or very nearly so), and the question remains, who am I? What am I? Who and what do I desire to be?
Ah! There! There is the flowering of the thought! Who do I want to be?
Two months ago I stood upon the precipice and saw only a fall into darkness. Now the precipice is only a cliff, and a light is dawning that opens up the vistas before me and shows me that a path stretches forth. Where will it lead me? Where shall I choose to walk? Who will I be upon it?
And so we return. Who am I? Who do I want to be? I don't know, but it's up to me.
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