Jul 31, 2008 21:53
Fandom: Firefly / Serenity
Title: Not on the Mouth
Summary: Jayne Cobb never kisses them on the mouth. He has his reasons for that. Pre-series. Sort of Jayne/OC, but not really. One-shot.
Word Count: 1,000
Disclaimer: I own nothing or no one. I really wish I could hire Jayne all for myself, but the ‘verse just doesn’t work that way…
Author's Notes: My first Firefly fic. YAY!
English is not my native language and this is not beta-ed, so feel free to point at any errors you find.
I’m afraid Jayne’s a bit out of character here, but this bunny hit me way too hard to be ignored - and I’m a big fan of the whole “there’s more to Jayne than meets the eye” thing anyway, so let's pretend everything is right in the 'verse…
--o--
Jayne Cobb hated goodbyes. First time he left his mother’s house, he did it in the middle of the night, so he wouldn’t have to see any tears in his old lady’s eyes. Tears that were threatening water the eyes of the young woman in front of him. His partner. Or former partner now. After some good years working together, they were being forced to follow separated ways.
She was a good girl. Jayne knew that. He knew it all too well. He never tried to take advantage of her, and to be honest, he used to feel a little guilty about taking her along with him in his mercenary life. But she had been so young back then, so helpless and defenseless, and he knew if she didn’t work with him, she would have to work with - or for - someone else, because she wouldn’t survive by herself. So, better him than some other hun dan, he convinced himself.
She was young and innocent when he first met her. He was twenty-five when that little scared fifteen year old girl had hired him to rescue her from her hun dan stepfather. She had no one else in the ‘verse, so Jayne had let her follow him around. She was smart, kind, and tough in her own delicate way - just like the daughter his mother had always dreamed about, but never brought to the world. Jayne knew she would be a good fit for his ma, and the girl needed a home anyways so, he figured, why not? His mother had taken a liking to the girl right away. Both he and his mother had taken her under their wings, teaching her everything she needed to survive out in the rim - teaching her how to be a Cobb. And she had done a good job at that. She was a fast learner, and now he dared anyone to say she wasn’t a Cobb.
She had grown in him as a mei-mei faster than she had grown herself into a woman, but that didn’t fool Jayne. She wasn’t that scared little girl that followed his every move like a lost puppy anymore; she was her own woman now, and Jayne secretly took some pride knowing that he had helped her get this far. He had kept her alive, and in turn she had planned some of the finest heists Jayne had pulled in his life. She was a smart one; maybe not a true mastermind, but she was a good brain to his good muscles. They formed a good team.
But they had crossed some big fish’s way, and the price on their heads was too good for him to risk keeping her around. They figured it was better to go separate ways. That Marco guy had offered him a fair share to be his gunman - 7 percent straight from the top; less than he was used to get working with the girl, but enough for him. And since she was going back to his ma’s place, he figured his mother wouldn’t need any extra for now. It was a good plan, and it was for the best.
He knew it was for the best, she had said that herself, but the silent terrified look she had sent his way once they reached the docks told him different. Was she really ready to be on her own? To be without him? Jayne wasn’t one to care about anyone else other than himself, but this girl had become family. Hell, she called his mother ‘ma’, so he told himself it was ok to care about her. She was family. His mei-mei. Not that he would ever admit that, even though his own mother referred to her as daughter. He looked down at her, and saw that look in her eyes again.
She looked at him with longing and frightened eyes, looking for something, hoping for any kind of assurance that he wouldn’t leave her for good, that he wouldn’t forget her. He had promised he wouldn’t, but she looked so scared, so lost, so much like that little girl he had rescued all those years ago, it made his heart ache. He had never returned to his mother’s house after they left once she turned eighteen, and her eyes were clearly asking if he would return for her. She wanted him to give her some kind of security. She wanted to hold on to something of his she knew he would come back for. And he wanted to give her that. He wanted to give her something - anything - that would make her certain, that would be hers and no one else’s. But he didn’t have anything; he was just a big bad mean mercenary, with nothing of his own but his guns. And he knew a gun wouldn’t be an appropriate token for their bond.
Jayne looked straight in her eyes - her hopeful frightened eyes - and made up his mind. He was going to give her the only thing he had, and he would never take it back. He leaned in and kissed her soft on the lips. She was startled at first, but welcomed the assuring gesture as it was: assurance. Slowly, he deepened the kiss, letting his tongue savor her. She tasted like home, and it hit him hard that, as soon as she put her feet on that boat, he would be leaving home again, he would be completely alone out in the black. They broke apart after what seemed an eternity, and she gave him a half smile, nodding her appreciation.
They locked eyes for another instant before she turned to leave and, in that moment, they both knew he would never kiss anyone else again. Not on the mouth. Those kisses were hers and hers alone. They were the only thing he had to offer, and she accepted them for what they were. Whatever they were. As he watched her boat leave, he wasn’t so sure anymore.
.
fanfics: firefly