Oct 01, 2010 03:32
Well it seems like the first of the month is a sort of habit of mine? Really you don't need to read this. This is me ranting at myself for being stupid, very stupid.
I'm good at lying. Incredably good at spelling .... just realised what I typed. Lying. Very very very good at lying. And it is morning and I have been crying for about 30 minutes so forgive spelling mistakes please!
Lying is what got me into this whole mess. Stressed mess. And I don't even have a way to relieve it! *sigh*
First it was my Drama h/w, I'm used to bullshitting that teacher anyway, and I got only slightly stressed over giving it in a week late and then using my Grandad's eye "problem" as a way to say thats why I couldn't give it in the thursday before (I have Drama on Mondays and I was meant to see Miss for open evening anyway so *shrugs* I didn't bother going to open evening. I just could. not. be. botherd.) Well my Grandad does have this horrible thing(s) wrong with his eye so it wasn't that far from the truth. My teacher still terrifies me even if she is one of the best I've ever had.
I also have a need to please people
I'm going to do some more h/w and then carry on typing.
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Note: at 3:26 on October 1st (a Friday) I decided I aint fucking doing no goddamn homework!!!! IT SUCKS AND I FELL ASLEEP ABOUT TWICE.
I think the shots I had earlier also affected me, I'm kinda just sat here swaying slowly....
It tasted like aniseed! It was epic! and combined with chocolate, tea, bacon crisps and midget gems, I think this was a good night. Cept for me reading angsty stories just so I could cry.
Seriously I can't cry over songs anymore! I remember a time I could put on Lilium and I would SOB. Now I need character death and a combination of sad songs just to make me leak! Its pathetic really. Well not really, its showing that I'm not as emotionally compromised as easily, and that I'm not such a child anymore.
Fuck I have PE theory in 2.30 Hours..... I need sleep!
sleep need it!,
school,
songs,
homework