(no subject)
Coldplay and Weezer, at the moment, are my comfort bands. Seriously.
I agree with Rivers. There are a lot of missing moods. Like right now I feel helpless. But there is no mood for that. So I'm using moody instead.
Right now I'm annoyed with myself and the need to bite my tongue about things. I have inpecable timing. Or maybe I should have bit my tongue in the first place. Half of me is wanting to chastize myself for letting my feelings rise to the vocal level. The other half wants to spurn those emotions on. It's interesting how it's tying me all up inside. I've started to private post to myself about it, just because I need to get it off my chest and I can't tell him anyone about what I'm thinking.
I am listening to this song and yet I simultaneously have Headfull of Ghosts [Bush] and In My Place [Coldplay] in my head.
I don't want denial. Mine or his anyone's. I can pretend I'm not feeling what I am, but I don't want to. I've never been good at pretending. And, as usual, I'm being too honest and saying too much.
It's not luck. You deserve at least this much attention. Just from someone who's allowed to give it to you. I wish I'd had the chance to know if it could have been me.
[edit] I'm making a phone call now. I lasted about fifteen minutes of telling myself I wouldn't call.
I agree with Rivers. There are a lot of missing moods. Like right now I feel helpless. But there is no mood for that. So I'm using moody instead.
Right now I'm annoyed with myself and the need to bite my tongue about things. I have inpecable timing. Or maybe I should have bit my tongue in the first place. Half of me is wanting to chastize myself for letting my feelings rise to the vocal level. The other half wants to spurn those emotions on. It's interesting how it's tying me all up inside. I've started to private post to myself about it, just because I need to get it off my chest and I can't tell him anyone about what I'm thinking.
I am listening to this song and yet I simultaneously have Headfull of Ghosts [Bush] and In My Place [Coldplay] in my head.
I don't want denial. Mine or his anyone's. I can pretend I'm not feeling what I am, but I don't want to. I've never been good at pretending. And, as usual, I'm being too honest and saying too much.
It's not luck. You deserve at least this much attention. Just from someone who's allowed to give it to you. I wish I'd had the chance to know if it could have been me.
[edit] I'm making a phone call now. I lasted about fifteen minutes of telling myself I wouldn't call.