LANGUAGE IS A VIRUS
I haven't been writing much lately, which is unfortunate because I have a plethora of time on my hands. I am still unemployed; steadily going broke. I spend most of my time trying to learn new things and working on a few projects. One of the most irritating things is that the more time I have, the less motivated and inspired I become. My ideas usually arrive when I am working all the time. I really just want to strike a useful balance between work and creativity (if I can't somehow synthesize the two).
I don't want to make tons of money or have a huge house and two cars. What I really want is a sustainable lifestyle. I've been at a crossroads for some time now. Do I "work the system", playing by the rules and carving out a comfortable niche? Or, do I take the more radical approach and move somewhere off the grid. Somehow both options seem like they have a limited life span, but when you get down to basics everything is temporary. If I could eradicate my own fears and anxiety then the choice would be much simpler.
I've been thinking so very much about so very many things, yet I can't seem to express myself clearly anymore. There are so many things I want to communicate but I somehow find myself at a loss for words. I often wonder if my mind has begun to erode.
I feel like verbal communication is dying with the advent of visual culture. Perhaps I'm just getting old. I find myself the victim of stuttering glitchy communication just as much as I notice it in other people my age. I am trying very hard not to say "like" unnecessarily, which proves exceedingly difficult for some reason, you know?
I don't even know what I'm trying to write about...guh.