(no subject)
EL OH EL.
tina makes me laugh really, really hard. seriously, when i read her response,
that's all i could do: laugh.
this was a long time in the coming. and i think you knew that. and honestly, i should'nt have to be writing this, but it seems like i have to. so here we go.
Ryan told me why you were crying. Because you think we (breanna and i, i'm assuming) hate you. And honestly, at the time, you weren't far from the truth. But i think over the past week we've come to a descision and decided to handle this maturely. It's up to you to take advantage of that descision.
We were mad at you. Both for diffrent (but some same) reasons, but we were both mad. Mad because ever since Kyle came along you treated us diffrent. You pushed us off to the side, like we didn't matter. You saved us for another time. You didn't listen to us, you wouldn't spend time with us, and if you did and Kyle wasn't
there, you weren't half of what you used to be until he came along. I could even call you and Kyle would be there, telling you to hang up.
Friends don't do this, and i'm sick of excuses. But let's save that for a later moment, right now I'd just like to say that this has happened more than once, and ever since you met Kyle.
When we would all get together, we couldn't even walk near you, sit near you and it was hard as hell to talk to you. Kyle would push us away, or he'd have his tongue shoved down your throat. (This is not a pleasent sight - more on that, too, later.) Communication was restraint to the telephone, and we all know how you hate that.
By the way, don't think that it's only Breanna and i who realized this. It's your other friends, too. I won't say names, because i think it's for them to tell to you and i don't know if they want you to know who they
are, but it's happened. And they've felt the same Breanna and i have.
pub¡Elic [puhb-lik]
¡Vadjective
8.
open to the view of all; existing or conducted in public
12.
a particular group of people with a common interest, aim, etc
3.
PDA
Public Displays of Affection, can be seen in the form of kissing, touching, groping, licking, nuzzling, cuddling, crossing hands into each other's opposite back pockets, etc. Usually spotted among new couples, frisky teenagers, and occasionally the "young at heart"
7.
PDA
Public Display of Affection
Damn annoying cuddling,caressing,lovey- dovey smooching; actually any physical contact short the "fist-to-the-face&qu ot; genre.Oh, right: in the presence of other living beings. Especially your friends! But animals count to, ya know. Spare the damn animals, you fiends! And the vegetation! LET GO!
No one likes watching you and Kyle making out, groping each other, ect. Seriously. It's just disgusting. I mean, we don't mind like.. an occasional kiss, holding hands and that stuff. That's perfectly okay with us. But when we can't even talk to you, and you sit there and do it the whole time, it's annoying and gross as hell. NO ONE LIKES IT AND IT MAKES US ALL WANT TO LEAVE. I've heard you say countless times that "we don't kiss in public" but you do. School is public. In town is
public. When we're all together, it's public. Deny it all you want, but it's public. You can save that for when you're alone.
You don't always need to be in physical contact.
Remember the time when you were scratching and freaking out on Breanna because she didn't want to move for you and Kyle to sit there on the couch? You left scratch and finger nail marks in Breanna's back. That's pathetic. Honestly, it was the dumbest thing i ever saw and it really went down hill from then on. If she was sitting there, she was sitting there. Fucking get over it. Move to the other side of the couch. You'll live, i promise. If you need to be asstoass with him all the time, then go to someone's room or sit on the floor. Don't fucking beat up your friend. That was sick and pathetic - even disgusting. I don't think i can stress that enough.
And then it really came for me, about
two weeks ago-ish. You weren't at park because you didn't have my sims game. (You still could've[should've] came.) I called you and asked if you'd be home. you said you would be, plus you'd been complaining that you were sick. So i trusted you'd be home. I ended up having to ruin Hailey and Alyssa's plans so i would have some place to go. They let me come over, but i felt really badly for having to ruin their plans just because my/our own had been ruined. And when my mom came at 5, you weren't home. No one was home. That was two hours after i called you. For the longest time no one was home at your house. Finally, at about seven pm, you're mom answered and said you were at Kyle's. So much for being sick, huh? So i called his house and he wouldn't even give you the phone. I had to sit there and be freaking interviewed before he even gave it to you. And then it came, and you
know what happened. You said you'd stop by tommrow and bring it. You never considered that maybe i had plans, maybe i had something to do and wouldn't be home. And then i delievered the line and i have to say this, because i don't want to lie: it felt great to say "fuck you" and hang up. because in those two words and punch of a key, was every time i ever got angry at you. every time you ever hurt me. i won't take those two words back. i think i should let you know why i was angry. it wasn't the fact that no one was home when i got there or that you forgot the cd. it was the fact that you weren't there. you told me you would be, and you weren't. instead, you left your responsibility to your parents and skipped off to Kyle's. The least you could've done was to call me and let me know you wouldn't be there or at least until late, but
no. You just shoved it at your parents and left without a warning.
This is another thing, a little off topic and nothing but a pet peeve of mine. You could treat your mom with a little more repsect. She's doing nothing but being a good mother to you and all you can do is tell her to shut up and leave. I guess it's really not a big deal, but i think you need to realize you're lucky to even HAVE a mother. Try a little respect? Not for me, but for her.
And you told me to tell you when you fuck up on xanga once, i'm sure you remember. But when Breanna or i try, or we try to explain how we never get time with you anymore because of Kyle, all you say is "you're just jealous." and you don't let us tell you. We're really sick of it. We're not jealous of Kyle, we just want our friend, the old Tina, back. You say you'd never change for anyone but you changed for Kyle.
Maybe you don't see it, but all of us see it. We're not jealous of Kyle, except for the fact that maybe he's the only one you seem to actually listen to and care about anymore.
I remember asking you "don't you love me?" and you said "no, i had Kyle now." That's sad. Just because a boy, who face it, you'll probably end up breaking up with someday, you don't love your friends anymore? you don't give a shit about them anymore? Haven't you ever heard the phrase "my friends over you"? Because what happens when you two breakup? Without your friends, you have no one to fall back on and you're all alone. You chose to ditch your friends for your boyfriend, and now you have to deal with the consequences. You're lucky we're all still nice to you and give you chance after chance. But for me, my patience and chances for you are running out. I'm sorry, but i'm done being made feel like shit,
being pushed back away and being told i'm just jealous of someone that i don't even like that much. http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/newfoundglory/myfriendsoveryou.html
By the way, you're excuses don't work. Don't tell me you're a bad friend, i can figure that our for myself. Don't tell me you don't know when you fuck up, because that's not my problem. Friendship is something you have to work on. Friendship sometimes means having to do things you don't like, prehaps calling a friend on the phone or telling your boyfriend you'll see him tommrow; you want to see your friend. Friendship is two people, and one can't do all the work.
So here's your last chance. I told you what's wrong and i'm giving you a chance to try and start to make it right. It's yours to turn down or take
up. Personally, i hope you take the chance because i still care about you and i still want to be your friend, but if that's not what you want, that's okay, too. At least you'll have made your own decision.
HER RESPONSE:
I would do anything to be your friend again.
The thing with Ryan was because EVERYONE was mad at me (or at least that's how it seemed). Not just you&Bre. But especially Bre and Gassman. Bre wouldn't even talk to me in school anymore, and I kept trying to apologize but everytime I came near her she'd walk faster or something, and I tried to talk to her and hug her once but she pushed me away, and that fucking hurt...a LOT. But I was crying because that night I realized that it was MY fault. And like...I realized that no one was turning on me, but that I was pushing them away. And I was like, "Shit...what have I done. I'm horrible."
And I was sad&lonely and depressed and being with Kyle made me feel loved and happy. So I started spending more time with him.
I know you don't like watching us making out and shit, and I don't blame you. 'Cause it bugs me too that he wants to do it all the time, but I promise...we've talked about it and he's getting better and he's not telling me what I can and can't do as much anymore. And it really pisses me off that he tries to control me.
And you have no idea how bad I felt about the Sims thing. I felt REALLY REALLY bad. And I was fucking pissed that he wouldn't give me the phone and I yelled at him about it. As my parents were driving away after dropping me off at Kyle's I realized that I'd forgotten about you, and I felt like such a bad friend and I felt fucking horrible. But I was sure that Eric was home so I figured he could give you the cd. And I wasn't lying about being sick. I was feeling a lot better that day and I hadn't spent time with him for a really long time, so I was happy to see him.
And when ever I say, "You're just jealous." I don't literally mean you're jealous, 'cause I know you're not. I just say that a LOT now. To everything. I never thought you were jealous. I promise, I wasn't.
""don't you love me?" and you said "no, i had Kyle now."" Joking. I was only joking. I'm so sorry I had no idea that hurt you. You need to tell me these things.
I miss what we used to be so much. I really really really really do. I would give nearly anything for you to realize how sorry I am and how much I regret how I've been for the past couple of months. Even KYLE pointed out that I've been worse. After I realized that I (&Kyle) was the problem I've been trying to fix things. Me&him talked for about 2 hours today and I promise I'm trying to fix it.
Kay, you might just think of this as a bunch of bull shit and excuses. But it's not. Basically it all sums down to "I'm sorry. I love you. Forgive me?" Not that I deserve you're forgiveness. Uhh, this'd be easier to talk about in person...if you could can you stay in town on Friday (since I'll be at Park to bring you that book)? Just you&me. Hell if you want you can beat me up, and take out all your anger on me.
Love,
Tina
Ps, uh...next time I do something that bothers me I want you to fucking tell me! Think about how easier things would be if we started talking months ago, think about what we could've avoided. I'll return the favor. Promise.
i guess i'll talk, but breanna is going to be there.
like it or not.
tina makes me laugh really, really hard. seriously, when i read her response,
that's all i could do: laugh.
this was a long time in the coming. and i think you knew that. and honestly, i should'nt have to be writing this, but it seems like i have to. so here we go.
Ryan told me why you were crying. Because you think we (breanna and i, i'm assuming) hate you. And honestly, at the time, you weren't far from the truth. But i think over the past week we've come to a descision and decided to handle this maturely. It's up to you to take advantage of that descision.
We were mad at you. Both for diffrent (but some same) reasons, but we were both mad. Mad because ever since Kyle came along you treated us diffrent. You pushed us off to the side, like we didn't matter. You saved us for another time. You didn't listen to us, you wouldn't spend time with us, and if you did and Kyle wasn't
there, you weren't half of what you used to be until he came along. I could even call you and Kyle would be there, telling you to hang up.
Friends don't do this, and i'm sick of excuses. But let's save that for a later moment, right now I'd just like to say that this has happened more than once, and ever since you met Kyle.
When we would all get together, we couldn't even walk near you, sit near you and it was hard as hell to talk to you. Kyle would push us away, or he'd have his tongue shoved down your throat. (This is not a pleasent sight - more on that, too, later.) Communication was restraint to the telephone, and we all know how you hate that.
By the way, don't think that it's only Breanna and i who realized this. It's your other friends, too. I won't say names, because i think it's for them to tell to you and i don't know if they want you to know who they
are, but it's happened. And they've felt the same Breanna and i have.
pub¡Elic [puhb-lik]
¡Vadjective
8.
open to the view of all; existing or conducted in public
12.
a particular group of people with a common interest, aim, etc
3.
PDA
Public Displays of Affection, can be seen in the form of kissing, touching, groping, licking, nuzzling, cuddling, crossing hands into each other's opposite back pockets, etc. Usually spotted among new couples, frisky teenagers, and occasionally the "young at heart"
7.
PDA
Public Display of Affection
Damn annoying cuddling,caressing,lovey- dovey smooching; actually any physical contact short the "fist-to-the-face&qu ot; genre.Oh, right: in the presence of other living beings. Especially your friends! But animals count to, ya know. Spare the damn animals, you fiends! And the vegetation! LET GO!
No one likes watching you and Kyle making out, groping each other, ect. Seriously. It's just disgusting. I mean, we don't mind like.. an occasional kiss, holding hands and that stuff. That's perfectly okay with us. But when we can't even talk to you, and you sit there and do it the whole time, it's annoying and gross as hell. NO ONE LIKES IT AND IT MAKES US ALL WANT TO LEAVE. I've heard you say countless times that "we don't kiss in public" but you do. School is public. In town is
public. When we're all together, it's public. Deny it all you want, but it's public. You can save that for when you're alone.
You don't always need to be in physical contact.
Remember the time when you were scratching and freaking out on Breanna because she didn't want to move for you and Kyle to sit there on the couch? You left scratch and finger nail marks in Breanna's back. That's pathetic. Honestly, it was the dumbest thing i ever saw and it really went down hill from then on. If she was sitting there, she was sitting there. Fucking get over it. Move to the other side of the couch. You'll live, i promise. If you need to be asstoass with him all the time, then go to someone's room or sit on the floor. Don't fucking beat up your friend. That was sick and pathetic - even disgusting. I don't think i can stress that enough.
And then it really came for me, about
two weeks ago-ish. You weren't at park because you didn't have my sims game. (You still could've[should've] came.) I called you and asked if you'd be home. you said you would be, plus you'd been complaining that you were sick. So i trusted you'd be home. I ended up having to ruin Hailey and Alyssa's plans so i would have some place to go. They let me come over, but i felt really badly for having to ruin their plans just because my/our own had been ruined. And when my mom came at 5, you weren't home. No one was home. That was two hours after i called you. For the longest time no one was home at your house. Finally, at about seven pm, you're mom answered and said you were at Kyle's. So much for being sick, huh? So i called his house and he wouldn't even give you the phone. I had to sit there and be freaking interviewed before he even gave it to you. And then it came, and you
know what happened. You said you'd stop by tommrow and bring it. You never considered that maybe i had plans, maybe i had something to do and wouldn't be home. And then i delievered the line and i have to say this, because i don't want to lie: it felt great to say "fuck you" and hang up. because in those two words and punch of a key, was every time i ever got angry at you. every time you ever hurt me. i won't take those two words back. i think i should let you know why i was angry. it wasn't the fact that no one was home when i got there or that you forgot the cd. it was the fact that you weren't there. you told me you would be, and you weren't. instead, you left your responsibility to your parents and skipped off to Kyle's. The least you could've done was to call me and let me know you wouldn't be there or at least until late, but
no. You just shoved it at your parents and left without a warning.
This is another thing, a little off topic and nothing but a pet peeve of mine. You could treat your mom with a little more repsect. She's doing nothing but being a good mother to you and all you can do is tell her to shut up and leave. I guess it's really not a big deal, but i think you need to realize you're lucky to even HAVE a mother. Try a little respect? Not for me, but for her.
And you told me to tell you when you fuck up on xanga once, i'm sure you remember. But when Breanna or i try, or we try to explain how we never get time with you anymore because of Kyle, all you say is "you're just jealous." and you don't let us tell you. We're really sick of it. We're not jealous of Kyle, we just want our friend, the old Tina, back. You say you'd never change for anyone but you changed for Kyle.
Maybe you don't see it, but all of us see it. We're not jealous of Kyle, except for the fact that maybe he's the only one you seem to actually listen to and care about anymore.
I remember asking you "don't you love me?" and you said "no, i had Kyle now." That's sad. Just because a boy, who face it, you'll probably end up breaking up with someday, you don't love your friends anymore? you don't give a shit about them anymore? Haven't you ever heard the phrase "my friends over you"? Because what happens when you two breakup? Without your friends, you have no one to fall back on and you're all alone. You chose to ditch your friends for your boyfriend, and now you have to deal with the consequences. You're lucky we're all still nice to you and give you chance after chance. But for me, my patience and chances for you are running out. I'm sorry, but i'm done being made feel like shit,
being pushed back away and being told i'm just jealous of someone that i don't even like that much. http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/newfoundglory/myfriendsoveryou.html
By the way, you're excuses don't work. Don't tell me you're a bad friend, i can figure that our for myself. Don't tell me you don't know when you fuck up, because that's not my problem. Friendship is something you have to work on. Friendship sometimes means having to do things you don't like, prehaps calling a friend on the phone or telling your boyfriend you'll see him tommrow; you want to see your friend. Friendship is two people, and one can't do all the work.
So here's your last chance. I told you what's wrong and i'm giving you a chance to try and start to make it right. It's yours to turn down or take
up. Personally, i hope you take the chance because i still care about you and i still want to be your friend, but if that's not what you want, that's okay, too. At least you'll have made your own decision.
HER RESPONSE:
I would do anything to be your friend again.
The thing with Ryan was because EVERYONE was mad at me (or at least that's how it seemed). Not just you&Bre. But especially Bre and Gassman. Bre wouldn't even talk to me in school anymore, and I kept trying to apologize but everytime I came near her she'd walk faster or something, and I tried to talk to her and hug her once but she pushed me away, and that fucking hurt...a LOT. But I was crying because that night I realized that it was MY fault. And like...I realized that no one was turning on me, but that I was pushing them away. And I was like, "Shit...what have I done. I'm horrible."
And I was sad&lonely and depressed and being with Kyle made me feel loved and happy. So I started spending more time with him.
I know you don't like watching us making out and shit, and I don't blame you. 'Cause it bugs me too that he wants to do it all the time, but I promise...we've talked about it and he's getting better and he's not telling me what I can and can't do as much anymore. And it really pisses me off that he tries to control me.
And you have no idea how bad I felt about the Sims thing. I felt REALLY REALLY bad. And I was fucking pissed that he wouldn't give me the phone and I yelled at him about it. As my parents were driving away after dropping me off at Kyle's I realized that I'd forgotten about you, and I felt like such a bad friend and I felt fucking horrible. But I was sure that Eric was home so I figured he could give you the cd. And I wasn't lying about being sick. I was feeling a lot better that day and I hadn't spent time with him for a really long time, so I was happy to see him.
And when ever I say, "You're just jealous." I don't literally mean you're jealous, 'cause I know you're not. I just say that a LOT now. To everything. I never thought you were jealous. I promise, I wasn't.
""don't you love me?" and you said "no, i had Kyle now."" Joking. I was only joking. I'm so sorry I had no idea that hurt you. You need to tell me these things.
I miss what we used to be so much. I really really really really do. I would give nearly anything for you to realize how sorry I am and how much I regret how I've been for the past couple of months. Even KYLE pointed out that I've been worse. After I realized that I (&Kyle) was the problem I've been trying to fix things. Me&him talked for about 2 hours today and I promise I'm trying to fix it.
Kay, you might just think of this as a bunch of bull shit and excuses. But it's not. Basically it all sums down to "I'm sorry. I love you. Forgive me?" Not that I deserve you're forgiveness. Uhh, this'd be easier to talk about in person...if you could can you stay in town on Friday (since I'll be at Park to bring you that book)? Just you&me. Hell if you want you can beat me up, and take out all your anger on me.
Love,
Tina
Ps, uh...next time I do something that bothers me I want you to fucking tell me! Think about how easier things would be if we started talking months ago, think about what we could've avoided. I'll return the favor. Promise.
i guess i'll talk, but breanna is going to be there.
like it or not.