Oct 04, 2007 21:26
I haven't written here in awhile so I think its time for update.. I was sent a poem from Stevie, and I wanted to put my interpretations here.
" Aunt Jennifer's Tigers
Aunt Jennifer's tigers prance across a screen,
Bright topaz denizens of a world of green.
They do not fear the men beneath the tree;
They pace in sleek chivalric certainty.
Aunt Jennifer's finger fluttering through her wool
Find even the ivory needle hard to pull.
The massive weight of Uncle's wedding band
Sits heavily upon Aunt Jennifer's hand.
When Aunt is dead, her terrified hands will lie
Still ringed with ordeals she was mastered by.
The tigers in the panel that she made
Will go on prancing, proud and unafraid.
Adrienne Rich"
It starts of pretty strange. Tigers Prancing across the screen? Ill get to the tigers later...
The denizens of world green. The privative world, the pre-industrial era, the world full of forests and wildlife "green". The men beneath the tree represent the evils of Industrial society and patriarchy. However in the next line the tigers are seeming unphased by society as they continue to "pace" chivalrously, they are remnant from an era long gone.
The 2nd paragraph goes into the world of Aunt Jennifer and how Patriarchy/her uncle, is oppressing her. By the third paragraph Aunt Jennifer is dead. But the world of environmentalism/eco-primitivism/feminism that she illustrated, is still carried on by the tigers who represent the world Aunt Jennifer created.
Anyways thats finished. Lets talk about life, meaning my life.
Not much is new. Well some stuff is. Like always, I am concerned about my future. Stevie and I attended Digital life this past weekend when I was up visiting him. I also helped him at the New-york tokyo booth. On the way to the Digital Life convention in th e taxi Stevie mentioned "Do you really want to get into network security, like is that what you want do with life?" I thought about it.. and it boggles me. All of this was prompted by Stevie who mentioned that I knew a lot about Video game marketing/history. He suggested I do some sort of work in the video game field, like management or marketing. Which sounds appealing to me. Lets put it this way. For awhile now Ive struggled if whether I should continue studying to be a System Administrator. I've loved video games so much since I was a kid, it would be great to get into the field. Sure I cant program, but I could get into the marketing field or management. It sounds appealing but I don't know what to make of it.
College has been nothing but a waste of time if I decide to take the path of getting into game marketing/management etc... I never really bothered to do intense soul searching into what I wanted to do. Ive already spent 2, going on 3 years in college and have made very little progress. I'm pretty disappointed in myself with that aspect. I wish I would have done well in high school, that way I would be going to school someplace where I actually enjoyed myself, and major in something that really interests me. I hate being in this kind of conflict. Instability, and and uncertainty drive me crazy. I've been telling my parents a lie about the last 2-3 years, and I don't know what to tell them. I don't even know what to tell myself.. I can't stress how much I despise living here in Williamsport.
Anyways, things with me and Stevie are great, Ive been much happier since I've been with him, and things look good for the two of us.