as i walk steadly through this summer rain, i couldn't help but wonder...
so these summer days, there's not much to them... or is there?
i can't exactly tell if its a bad thing yet, but i've been so locked up in my own thoughts, its like nothing else exists right now but me...and its kind of separating me from reality, well at least the reality that is outside of my walls. maybe its from the lack of talking to people, but its been so hard lately...people....the truth...whats coming next...and yet i find myself questioning the loyalty i have in myself, and for the first time in my life i don't have an answer for myself and i can't help but feel...some feeling that i can't idenify that's driving me insane. and my mind has been playing tricks making me consider things that ive never even thought twice about before. and i feel changed..different like part of me is locked up behind closed doors leaving a different part of me so exposed it's exhillerating and frightening at the same time and i find myself laughing when things aren't funny but so messed up that i can't stand to leave the comfort of my own bedroom.
other than that, i feel a lot more open(in a vulnerable way) ive been writing a lot, and not just a lot but alot. i went to this creative writing class at the academy and it was just indiscribable, its so amazing how you can release some of ur deepest hidden thoughts in ways u wouldn't imagine, that is until you actually do it. and the people there, they just have a way of understanding through their own writing that its like its own communication altogether being read outloud.
i dunno just some food for thought...
i can't exactly tell if its a bad thing yet, but i've been so locked up in my own thoughts, its like nothing else exists right now but me...and its kind of separating me from reality, well at least the reality that is outside of my walls. maybe its from the lack of talking to people, but its been so hard lately...people....the truth...whats coming next...and yet i find myself questioning the loyalty i have in myself, and for the first time in my life i don't have an answer for myself and i can't help but feel...some feeling that i can't idenify that's driving me insane. and my mind has been playing tricks making me consider things that ive never even thought twice about before. and i feel changed..different like part of me is locked up behind closed doors leaving a different part of me so exposed it's exhillerating and frightening at the same time and i find myself laughing when things aren't funny but so messed up that i can't stand to leave the comfort of my own bedroom.
other than that, i feel a lot more open(in a vulnerable way) ive been writing a lot, and not just a lot but alot. i went to this creative writing class at the academy and it was just indiscribable, its so amazing how you can release some of ur deepest hidden thoughts in ways u wouldn't imagine, that is until you actually do it. and the people there, they just have a way of understanding through their own writing that its like its own communication altogether being read outloud.
i dunno just some food for thought...