[Ben stretches and yawns, waking up to the sound of singing--
And realizes that he's naked and human. He grabs for his clothes and quickly puts them on, turning his face into the sun when he's dressed and just... enjoying it.]
That's beautiful. [Whether he's referring to the sunrise or the singing is an open question. Probably both.]
[Guriel ducks his head, instinctively unsure of what to do with the compliment, warmed by it even as it makes him a little unsteady.] My Father made this. All of this.
Well, He did good work. [Ben's statement encompasses the angel as well as the landscape.] So, last night was... okay? [His memories are hazy, like they don't belong to him.] I didn't go crazy and try to kill you or anything?
[Guriel . . . isn't sure how to take the stab of disappointment he feels at the words. Why couldn't the man have remembered what he told the wolf, spared him having to work out the boundaries of Pack with someone human-shaped?]
I . . . no. It was . . . good. It was better than good.
[Well, color him relieved. He's not a mindless man-eating monster as a wolf. He relaxes, subtly.] Maybe if I work on it, I'll be able to remember better. [Pondering for a few seconds.] Like, Changing for a few minutes at a time, and then back.
. . . maybe. [But Guriel's cringing, inwardly, at the prospect of having the wolf back and losing him again, over and over again . . . it's too much like auction blocks, like being sold away and seeing others sold away.]
[He tilts his head.] What, Guriel? If I don't know what's bothering you, I can't fix it. You can tell me. I won't... [His brow creases.] Hurt you. Or whatever happened when you dared voice an opinion. Not ever, okay?
...oh. [They bonded. Huh.] Well. I mean. He's always in here. And not hard to call up, honestly. If we're... someplace I can Change... and you want him. You... you can ask.
I don't know if I'll always say yes. But I won't... think bad of you. Or whatever. If you want him. If you love him.
[Ben nods.] I know. It's okay, Guriel. I won't judge you for that. [Judging the universe, maybe, because how awful is it that the angel had to turn to a monster for solace. What the hell.] He makes you feel less alone. That's a good thing and nothing you need to be ashamed of, okay?
[Guriel nods, glancing hesitantly up at the American. Because . . .
Because he wasn't the only one alone in that cave, and he ignored that, because acknowledging it hurt too much, because hate and apathy and fear were easier and safer than compassion.]
Hey, you have your own shit to deal with, without worrying about mine, okay? It's fine, Guriel. Really. [He gets up and heads toward the water to rinse out his mouth and wash his face. The empty day stretches ahead of him, since he really can't go back until tomorrow. Ugh.
But he feels halfway human again after splashing himself clean, anyway.] So I guess you and the wolf got along okay, then. [Yes. Awesome conversational gambit. Thank you, Captain Obvious.]
[Guriel nods, running his thumb along the edge of his ring again.]He's afraid. They hurt him and made him do something awful, and he's all alone with nobody to tell him what to do. He's only a . . . a baby.
[Ben blinks a little. He hadn't thought of it that way. All he knew was the wolf ate a kid. He didn't realize that it affected him too. Or even that the wolf might have thoughts of its own.] He's not... just a mindless animal, then.
And you love him. [Which totally answers the question of whether he's taking the angel home with him. He can't separate him from someone he loves. God knows Guriel's probably seen enough separations in his life. Ben can actually prevent this one.]
And realizes that he's naked and human. He grabs for his clothes and quickly puts them on, turning his face into the sun when he's dressed and just... enjoying it.]
That's beautiful. [Whether he's referring to the sunrise or the singing is an open question. Probably both.]
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I . . . no. It was . . . good. It was better than good.
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Maybe?
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The wolf is. He makes me. Feel safe. Feel l-loved.
Bringing him back. And then taking him away. Like that. I just. It doesn't, I don't w . . . [And he stumbles to a stop, ashamed.]
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I don't know if I'll always say yes. But I won't... think bad of you. Or whatever. If you want him. If you love him.
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I'm sorry. It's not you. Your fault. I'm just . . .
I've just been alone. For a long time.
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Because he wasn't the only one alone in that cave, and he ignored that, because acknowledging it hurt too much, because hate and apathy and fear were easier and safer than compassion.]
. . . I'm sorry.
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But he feels halfway human again after splashing himself clean, anyway.] So I guess you and the wolf got along okay, then. [Yes. Awesome conversational gambit. Thank you, Captain Obvious.]
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And you love him. [Which totally answers the question of whether he's taking the angel home with him. He can't separate him from someone he loves. God knows Guriel's probably seen enough separations in his life. Ben can actually prevent this one.]
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[And Guriel so very desperately needs to be needed, to be useful and loved and important to someone.]
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