(no subject)
"You didn't ruin my trousers, did you?" Fry asked anxiously, when Guppy came back through the door.
"I keep telling you, Fry, I used to sew faces, your trousers are fine." Guppy handed them over. "Now I've checked the blazer and it won't take up as easily, do you want me to risk it or are you happy to have slightly too long sleeves? You're allowed to take it off once you get to school."
"It's fine. Thanks." Fry said.
"No problem. It was nice of Lenny to sell you his old uniform with a discount, I hope you thanked him."
"I did." Fry said.
"Oh, by the way." Guppy said. "Wilford says there's a super power causing some trouble in the bar. I know you and the others can't stop yourselves being picked up but if you see anything dodgy you're to leave right away, okay?"
"Okay. What's the super power's name?"
"...I don't know. Wilford didn't say."
"Did you get a description?" Fry asked.
"No. Wilford took the hump when I tried to explain that you guys have your own doors."
"What was the superpower?"
"I don't know. Other than that he punched Wilford in the jaw."
"Got it. Super power, no name, no description, one of the people who punched Wilford." Fry rolled his eyes." No offence, Dad, but you and Wilford are cumulatively useless."
Guppy watched his son go, and then smiled suddenly to himself, wondering when Fry suddenly become such a tweenager.
"Dad?" Coral stood at the doorway.
"Oh hey sweetheart. Next time we're in the bar together, can you point out your friend Sinthia for me? I heard she's on her own."
"Yes. But she's very independent." Coral said. "So I think you don't need to worry very much. Can I ask you about something important?"
"Of course." Guppy sat down on the sofa and beckoned for her to join him, which she did.
"You know Fry's new school, can only geniuses go there?" Coral said.
"Not quite." Guppy said. "It has a gifted and talented program and the exam for everyone else is harder than the other schools round here, but you don't have to be a genius. It wouldn't have many students if you did. Fry's not a genius anyway, he's just ahead at a couple of subjects."
"Can dyslexic people go there?" Coral asked.
"Of course." Guppy looked at her. "Why, are you thinking of trying for it?"
"Miss Havisham said that I should be aiming higher." Coral said. "Like, I know it's expensive, but now that Brooke's going to a free school in September can I try and go to the same school as Fry?"
Guppy grimaced slightly. He had been greatly disappointed that Brooke couldn't get into the Montessori, which really looked a good fit for her, but had a huge waiting list. Fran had put her foot down about the home schooling, and Brooke had told them if she had to go to another 'posh strict' school she would get thrown out on purpose, so they had given in and enrolled her at London Road Primary. On the plus side, it was a five minute walk down the road, but it wasn't as highly rated by Ofsted as Guppy would have liked. Still, Brooke seemed enthusiastic, so they had agreed to give it a try. And guilty as he felt about this not giving all his children the same opportunities, it did resolve their imminent cash flow problems.
"I don't think I'd get a scholarship so I'd understand if it's too much..." Coral continued, while Guppy was thinking.
"I can't promise, because it depends how your mum's new business goes." Guppy said. "But you can certainly sit the exam and if you do get in we'll do whatever we can to make it happen, okay?"
"Thanks Dad."
"Are you wanting to try for the gifted and talented program this year, or the main exam next year?" Guppy asked.
"Both." Coral said. "Because if I don't get in the first time it'll be good practice for the second."
"Fair enough." Guppy nodded. "I'm proud of you, you know that."
"Great, another swot in the family." Brooke said, coming in and interrupting the moment.
"Hey! I have hopes and dreams for all of you kids, no matter what school you're in." Guppy said.
"I'm not taking any entrance exams for big school, I decided." Brooke said. "And if you make me I'll just write swears on the papers."
"Let's not get years ahead of ourselves." Guppy said, ignoring this direct provocation. "I won't be making any of you take entrance exams you don't want to, but wherever you go I expect you to try your best. Are you looking forward to your new school, Brooke?"
"Yes, home schooling is boooooring." Brooke said, swinging on the arm of the chair. "And I don't have to wear a tie or a blazer. And Nat from hockey is in my class. Can we go to Smiggle tomorrow?"
"Only if you're spending your own pocket money." Guppy said. "I'm not forking out for Smiggle."
"Nat says everyone has Smiggle."
"I don't think Nat's right about that, Brooke. Lots of kids can't afford designer stationary."
He left his daughter discussing the merits of paying £7.50 for a pencil case and went through to the kitchen to join Fran, who was deep in paperwork.
A couple of weeks ago, Fran had put her foot down. She had taken Guppy out of earshot of their children, and told him that although she loved the children very much, she had career aspirations too, and she was sick of him doing horrendous amounts of overtime and private clinics to accommodate their unexpected fifth child.
"If I set up my own practice, I can earn far more than I do now, and I can work around our childcare." she had said.
"But you hate the private sector." Guppy had replied.
"Yes, but that's where things are going in this country, whether I like it or not." Fran had said. "And I want to do free drop in clinics for the homeless once a month, which I'll be able to afford to do. I've done the maths, and if I can get enough clients, you can go back to working five days most weeks rather than six."
And so Fran's physio business had been born, though not yet launched, and in any case she would have to work in her old job from September until the end of November. Looking at his wife's business plans, Guppy was seeing a new side of Fran, an ambition and fire that was quite different from her relaxed attitude to work. He liked it.
"Hey. Tea?"
"Yes please." Fran looked up at him. "Did you fix Fry's trousers?"
"Yeah, they needed taking up quite a lot, Lenny's a beanpole." Guppy said, putting the kettle on. "Should fit him for a few years if he looks after them."
"It is a nice sturdy uniform." Fran agreed. "I've told Brooke she needs to make a friend a few years older for next year, there was nothing her size at the bring and swap."
Guppy nodded. As the kettle boiled, he made the tea.
"Fran, do you think we're bad parents not managing to stop our kids getting into the bar?"
Fran looked up at him.
"A magic portal that can appear in any doorway in the world and can even pick people up when they're unconscious? I don't see how we can control that. Why?"
"Oh, just Wilford." Guppy said. "He's worried about Michael and got angry when I tried to explain how the doors work with the kids."
"Well..." Fran poured milk in her tea. "While you know what I say about not internalising things Wilford says to you, maybe you need to have more compassion. We've had over a decade to deal with this, Wilford hasn't. Of course he didn't want to hear it was inevitable. It's taken you years of therapy to deal with it."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I'll apologise to him again later."
"I usually am."
"I'm not sure that 'Happy Frog' is the name I'd choose for your business though." Guppy pointed at some branding ideas.
"That's just a placeholder Coral came up with. Brooke wanted it to be 'Bonecrunchers'."
"I keep telling you, Fry, I used to sew faces, your trousers are fine." Guppy handed them over. "Now I've checked the blazer and it won't take up as easily, do you want me to risk it or are you happy to have slightly too long sleeves? You're allowed to take it off once you get to school."
"It's fine. Thanks." Fry said.
"No problem. It was nice of Lenny to sell you his old uniform with a discount, I hope you thanked him."
"I did." Fry said.
"Oh, by the way." Guppy said. "Wilford says there's a super power causing some trouble in the bar. I know you and the others can't stop yourselves being picked up but if you see anything dodgy you're to leave right away, okay?"
"Okay. What's the super power's name?"
"...I don't know. Wilford didn't say."
"Did you get a description?" Fry asked.
"No. Wilford took the hump when I tried to explain that you guys have your own doors."
"What was the superpower?"
"I don't know. Other than that he punched Wilford in the jaw."
"Got it. Super power, no name, no description, one of the people who punched Wilford." Fry rolled his eyes." No offence, Dad, but you and Wilford are cumulatively useless."
Guppy watched his son go, and then smiled suddenly to himself, wondering when Fry suddenly become such a tweenager.
"Dad?" Coral stood at the doorway.
"Oh hey sweetheart. Next time we're in the bar together, can you point out your friend Sinthia for me? I heard she's on her own."
"Yes. But she's very independent." Coral said. "So I think you don't need to worry very much. Can I ask you about something important?"
"Of course." Guppy sat down on the sofa and beckoned for her to join him, which she did.
"You know Fry's new school, can only geniuses go there?" Coral said.
"Not quite." Guppy said. "It has a gifted and talented program and the exam for everyone else is harder than the other schools round here, but you don't have to be a genius. It wouldn't have many students if you did. Fry's not a genius anyway, he's just ahead at a couple of subjects."
"Can dyslexic people go there?" Coral asked.
"Of course." Guppy looked at her. "Why, are you thinking of trying for it?"
"Miss Havisham said that I should be aiming higher." Coral said. "Like, I know it's expensive, but now that Brooke's going to a free school in September can I try and go to the same school as Fry?"
Guppy grimaced slightly. He had been greatly disappointed that Brooke couldn't get into the Montessori, which really looked a good fit for her, but had a huge waiting list. Fran had put her foot down about the home schooling, and Brooke had told them if she had to go to another 'posh strict' school she would get thrown out on purpose, so they had given in and enrolled her at London Road Primary. On the plus side, it was a five minute walk down the road, but it wasn't as highly rated by Ofsted as Guppy would have liked. Still, Brooke seemed enthusiastic, so they had agreed to give it a try. And guilty as he felt about this not giving all his children the same opportunities, it did resolve their imminent cash flow problems.
"I don't think I'd get a scholarship so I'd understand if it's too much..." Coral continued, while Guppy was thinking.
"I can't promise, because it depends how your mum's new business goes." Guppy said. "But you can certainly sit the exam and if you do get in we'll do whatever we can to make it happen, okay?"
"Thanks Dad."
"Are you wanting to try for the gifted and talented program this year, or the main exam next year?" Guppy asked.
"Both." Coral said. "Because if I don't get in the first time it'll be good practice for the second."
"Fair enough." Guppy nodded. "I'm proud of you, you know that."
"Great, another swot in the family." Brooke said, coming in and interrupting the moment.
"Hey! I have hopes and dreams for all of you kids, no matter what school you're in." Guppy said.
"I'm not taking any entrance exams for big school, I decided." Brooke said. "And if you make me I'll just write swears on the papers."
"Let's not get years ahead of ourselves." Guppy said, ignoring this direct provocation. "I won't be making any of you take entrance exams you don't want to, but wherever you go I expect you to try your best. Are you looking forward to your new school, Brooke?"
"Yes, home schooling is boooooring." Brooke said, swinging on the arm of the chair. "And I don't have to wear a tie or a blazer. And Nat from hockey is in my class. Can we go to Smiggle tomorrow?"
"Only if you're spending your own pocket money." Guppy said. "I'm not forking out for Smiggle."
"Nat says everyone has Smiggle."
"I don't think Nat's right about that, Brooke. Lots of kids can't afford designer stationary."
He left his daughter discussing the merits of paying £7.50 for a pencil case and went through to the kitchen to join Fran, who was deep in paperwork.
A couple of weeks ago, Fran had put her foot down. She had taken Guppy out of earshot of their children, and told him that although she loved the children very much, she had career aspirations too, and she was sick of him doing horrendous amounts of overtime and private clinics to accommodate their unexpected fifth child.
"If I set up my own practice, I can earn far more than I do now, and I can work around our childcare." she had said.
"But you hate the private sector." Guppy had replied.
"Yes, but that's where things are going in this country, whether I like it or not." Fran had said. "And I want to do free drop in clinics for the homeless once a month, which I'll be able to afford to do. I've done the maths, and if I can get enough clients, you can go back to working five days most weeks rather than six."
And so Fran's physio business had been born, though not yet launched, and in any case she would have to work in her old job from September until the end of November. Looking at his wife's business plans, Guppy was seeing a new side of Fran, an ambition and fire that was quite different from her relaxed attitude to work. He liked it.
"Hey. Tea?"
"Yes please." Fran looked up at him. "Did you fix Fry's trousers?"
"Yeah, they needed taking up quite a lot, Lenny's a beanpole." Guppy said, putting the kettle on. "Should fit him for a few years if he looks after them."
"It is a nice sturdy uniform." Fran agreed. "I've told Brooke she needs to make a friend a few years older for next year, there was nothing her size at the bring and swap."
Guppy nodded. As the kettle boiled, he made the tea.
"Fran, do you think we're bad parents not managing to stop our kids getting into the bar?"
Fran looked up at him.
"A magic portal that can appear in any doorway in the world and can even pick people up when they're unconscious? I don't see how we can control that. Why?"
"Oh, just Wilford." Guppy said. "He's worried about Michael and got angry when I tried to explain how the doors work with the kids."
"Well..." Fran poured milk in her tea. "While you know what I say about not internalising things Wilford says to you, maybe you need to have more compassion. We've had over a decade to deal with this, Wilford hasn't. Of course he didn't want to hear it was inevitable. It's taken you years of therapy to deal with it."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I'll apologise to him again later."
"I usually am."
"I'm not sure that 'Happy Frog' is the name I'd choose for your business though." Guppy pointed at some branding ideas.
"That's just a placeholder Coral came up with. Brooke wanted it to be 'Bonecrunchers'."