(no subject)
It's at times like this when I just feel like breaking down in tears. It's times like this when I feel that everything I wanted in life was wrong and useless and the system has beaten me. It's times like this when I just wish I could die and get it over with.
I should have left last night. I should have called it quits, never came back. I should have just left. Then I wouldn't be close to tears, then I wouldn't have that horrible feeling in me that I've had since I started talking last night, the feeling that has gotten worse and didn't let me get up in the morning. I threw up four times last night and three times already to-day. I'm just getting worse. I don't want to think about.
How can I not think about it? She doesn't deny that it was all a lie. She doesn't even try to make me stay. She just stays silent, she just goes on with her life as though I don't matter. She just dissapears, and that is that.
I am a product of my society.
I am a product of the media.
I am a product of modern culture.
I am not flesh and blood.
I am the needles that have been put in me since birth.
I am the voices that have filled my head from television.
I am the dust on the floors of the theatre.
I am the lies of politicians.
I am the blood oozing out of childrens eyes.
I am the foam in a rabid animals mouth.
I am Jack's rotting liver.
I am Jack's tar-filled lungs.
I am the nicotine in the coffee.
I am the poison in the alcohol.
I am the poison in Jack's blood-stream.
I am the chemicals running through your blood.
I am the cancerous tumor from using a cell phone.
I am the cancer the microwaves emanates.
I am a product of modern society.
I am the racist.
I am the rapist.
I am the underage child drinking.
I am the premarital sex.
I am the birth that kills.
I am the things this country was named after.
I am the Free Masons rituals.
I am the bodies buried in our presidents houses.
I am the prostitue in the White House.
I am the lies that are moral values.
I am the citizens blank eyes.
I am a product of modern society.
I AM THE LIES EVERYONE IS PERPETUATING.
I AM THE NEON SIGNS THAT SAY "THIS IS HOME"
I AM THE LIES EVERYONE IS CREATING.
I AM OUR UNWORTHY LEADERS.
I AM THE ELECTRIC SHOCK THAT KILLS THE INNOCENT.
I AM THE CORRUPTIBLE YOUTH.
I AM THE CHILD WHO REACHES FOR THE HAND GUN.
I AM THE BULLET THAT LODGES IN THE BRAIN.
I AM DEATH BY NATURAL CAUSES.
I am the stillborn baby.
I am the needle that punctured the womb.
I am a product of modern society.
Look away in disgust, O Readers.
I AM YOU.
HOW DO YOU BURY THE SKULL OF A COUNTRY?!
HOW DO YOU BURY THE SKULL OF A COUNTRY?!
Our mirrors are growing larger and larger.
I should have left last night. I should have called it quits, never came back. I should have just left. Then I wouldn't be close to tears, then I wouldn't have that horrible feeling in me that I've had since I started talking last night, the feeling that has gotten worse and didn't let me get up in the morning. I threw up four times last night and three times already to-day. I'm just getting worse. I don't want to think about.
How can I not think about it? She doesn't deny that it was all a lie. She doesn't even try to make me stay. She just stays silent, she just goes on with her life as though I don't matter. She just dissapears, and that is that.
I am a product of my society.
I am a product of the media.
I am a product of modern culture.
I am not flesh and blood.
I am the needles that have been put in me since birth.
I am the voices that have filled my head from television.
I am the dust on the floors of the theatre.
I am the lies of politicians.
I am the blood oozing out of childrens eyes.
I am the foam in a rabid animals mouth.
I am Jack's rotting liver.
I am Jack's tar-filled lungs.
I am the nicotine in the coffee.
I am the poison in the alcohol.
I am the poison in Jack's blood-stream.
I am the chemicals running through your blood.
I am the cancerous tumor from using a cell phone.
I am the cancer the microwaves emanates.
I am a product of modern society.
I am the racist.
I am the rapist.
I am the underage child drinking.
I am the premarital sex.
I am the birth that kills.
I am the things this country was named after.
I am the Free Masons rituals.
I am the bodies buried in our presidents houses.
I am the prostitue in the White House.
I am the lies that are moral values.
I am the citizens blank eyes.
I am a product of modern society.
I AM THE LIES EVERYONE IS PERPETUATING.
I AM THE NEON SIGNS THAT SAY "THIS IS HOME"
I AM THE LIES EVERYONE IS CREATING.
I AM OUR UNWORTHY LEADERS.
I AM THE ELECTRIC SHOCK THAT KILLS THE INNOCENT.
I AM THE CORRUPTIBLE YOUTH.
I AM THE CHILD WHO REACHES FOR THE HAND GUN.
I AM THE BULLET THAT LODGES IN THE BRAIN.
I AM DEATH BY NATURAL CAUSES.
I am the stillborn baby.
I am the needle that punctured the womb.
I am a product of modern society.
Look away in disgust, O Readers.
I AM YOU.
HOW DO YOU BURY THE SKULL OF A COUNTRY?!
HOW DO YOU BURY THE SKULL OF A COUNTRY?!
Our mirrors are growing larger and larger.