For a laugh, I'll post my dating profile for you guys to read
My self-summary
I'm friendly, and get along with people I don't know pretty well (except the crackhead I just threw out back in the dumpster).
I'm a jokester, but I'm also honest....people that know me say sometimes I'm honest to a fault. Damn, why they got to be so honest like that? That's so harsh...
I enjoy animals very much, especially when it gets cold.
I am currently trying to get experience in the zoology field, by starting a zoo at home.
I have 3 hungry cats, 2 feisty gerbils, 1 comatose hamster, and 6 dead fish (by far, the easiest pets I've ever cared for).
I have been trying to teach my cat to walk on a leash, so I will have company while hiking, but I have decided the claw marks are just not worth it.
Yes, that's right, I love to hike, and without a hiking partner that draws blood preferably...(well, maybe a little blood ;) . So if you don't draw TOO much blood, perhaps you could go with me sometime, and I'll even let you walk the cat.
I take photos too.
Photos of the colorful mountains.
Photos of wild animals.
Photos of the half-eaten deer carcass in the gulch I just hiked through...ah nature, it's so beautiful. Can you picture it?...well, if you can't, check out my gallery:
http://greenunderground.deviantart.com/gallery/
I joke a lot, but seriously, at this time in my life, I'm looking to find someone to share exciting and everyday times with me.
Someone to climb the next mountain, watch a movie, walk hand in hand, play board games, go on road trips, wash the dishes, do my laundry, take out
the tras.... I mean..uuh, did I just say that out loud! I'm sorry, I would never want you to watch a movie if it's going to get in the way of your chores.
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This seems to be an important question for a lot of ladies. Yes, I am financially stable. I have netflix and can even buy fish food on some days. Been at my job for eight years. I make enough to support myself and my bills and all my pets(most times) without asking for anything from anyone. No, I probably won't try to advance in my job even though I definitely could. The position to move up is called human punching bag, but I told them corporate lackeys, "YoU CaN foOl Me ONcE, BuT caN't FoOl mE tHe FirSt TiMe!1!!!11!" I have a simple lifestyle, and I enjoy it that way.
Just letting women know, if the job and status thing is that important to you, I could lie to you if you want, and say I work for an investment banking firm, but would that make either of us happy in the long run? Maybe for a couple minutes I guess. Until I felt guilty for lying, and then you found out the truth and got mad at me, and then stopped talking to me altogether. Making me a hollow shell of my fake persona, crying in the bathtub with hot water spraying down from the shower head above, trying to burn out my grief.
What I'm doing with my life
Working retail at nights. Serving the finest pimps, drug dealers, hoes, strippers, drunks, crackheads, d***heads, and the rest of Colorado Springs' finest nighttime clientele.
I also volunteer at various animal shelters. Right now I'm cleaning out kennels, but they have assured me that one day I could work my way up to
euthanization.
That's me, volunteer of the month, Pet Vet Kevorkian.
I'm really good at
Responsibility, photography, sleeping, cleaning the mildew that you find between the bathroom tiles with a toothbrush, and brushing my teeth...with the
same toothbrush.
The first thing(s) people usually notice about me
My full head of hair.
My favorite books, movies, music, and food
Listening to Lady GaGa/Justice/Crystal Castles/Kylie Minogue/Alex Young/Madonna
The six things I could never do without
Brown rice, diet soda, family, my pets, mountains, anti-psychotic painkillers...ok, they're really only aspirins, but it's always nice to dream.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
what I'm doing when I'm doing it, and when I'm not I'm probably sleeping...or I could be at work, because I'm pretty much a brain dead zombie while I'm there.
Otherwise I'm pretty analytical in how I think about things.
On a typical Friday night I am
Having the time of my life selling hypodermic needles and drano to the bums that come in on the night shift. Just doing my part to save the human race and promote world peace.
That is unless I have it off, then I am getting my swerve on at the club, and then coming home and chugging diet root beer with my cats until I pass out, then puking up hairballs in the toilet with them the next morning.
Like I say, live fast, die some other day. I would say die young, but I'm past that point in my life. Now I'm just looking for someone to die with some day that's not today or tomorrow, hopefully not even the day after that, but someday hopefully a long time from now when scientists have discovered the key to longevity, and then I guess we won't really die, but will live forever, because by living that long they will have already advanced longevity to living forever...so I guess what I really want is someone to live forever with...but that doesn't really belong in this section on what I'm doing on Friday nights, so mentally cut and paste this paragraph into the "You should message me if" section, but that section is kind of dumb, because girls don't message guys first just as a rule of thumb, because well, that's just not the way it works. So I should just put in that section not to ever message me unless I message you first, because you were never going to message me first anyways. At least then I can feel like I have some control over the situation.
The most private thing I'm willing to admit here
I a bit obsessed with my diet.
I'm also not into a lot of manly man activities...except grunting, wearing flannel, and clubbing future partners over the head and dragging them back to my cave.
You should message me if
You like handsome bald guys, dead fish, cleaning toilets, or if you want to get to know my serious side...well, that might be taking it a bit far.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Message me if you are a nice or sarcastic or both girl who might enjoy animals, the environment, the outdoors, photography, gaming, intellectual stuff, recycling, vegetarianism, or any other assorted tree hugger things.
First Date
Hunt and kill little bunnies to feed to my cats. Climb a mountain and roll boulders onto the highways below. Walk little old ladies halfway across the street, and then abandon them...or just the dinner, coffee, walk, hike thing if you wanna get all traditional about it...geez
I'm friendly, and get along with people I don't know pretty well (except the crackhead I just threw out back in the dumpster).
I'm a jokester, but I'm also honest....people that know me say sometimes I'm honest to a fault. Damn, why they got to be so honest like that? That's so harsh...
I enjoy animals very much, especially when it gets cold.
I am currently trying to get experience in the zoology field, by starting a zoo at home.
I have 3 hungry cats, 2 feisty gerbils, 1 comatose hamster, and 6 dead fish (by far, the easiest pets I've ever cared for).
I have been trying to teach my cat to walk on a leash, so I will have company while hiking, but I have decided the claw marks are just not worth it.
Yes, that's right, I love to hike, and without a hiking partner that draws blood preferably...(well, maybe a little blood ;) . So if you don't draw TOO much blood, perhaps you could go with me sometime, and I'll even let you walk the cat.
I take photos too.
Photos of the colorful mountains.
Photos of wild animals.
Photos of the half-eaten deer carcass in the gulch I just hiked through...ah nature, it's so beautiful. Can you picture it?...well, if you can't, check out my gallery:
http://greenunderground.deviantart.com/gallery/
I joke a lot, but seriously, at this time in my life, I'm looking to find someone to share exciting and everyday times with me.
Someone to climb the next mountain, watch a movie, walk hand in hand, play board games, go on road trips, wash the dishes, do my laundry, take out
the tras.... I mean..uuh, did I just say that out loud! I'm sorry, I would never want you to watch a movie if it's going to get in the way of your chores.
-----------
This seems to be an important question for a lot of ladies. Yes, I am financially stable. I have netflix and can even buy fish food on some days. Been at my job for eight years. I make enough to support myself and my bills and all my pets(most times) without asking for anything from anyone. No, I probably won't try to advance in my job even though I definitely could. The position to move up is called human punching bag, but I told them corporate lackeys, "YoU CaN foOl Me ONcE, BuT caN't FoOl mE tHe FirSt TiMe!1!!!11!" I have a simple lifestyle, and I enjoy it that way.
Just letting women know, if the job and status thing is that important to you, I could lie to you if you want, and say I work for an investment banking firm, but would that make either of us happy in the long run? Maybe for a couple minutes I guess. Until I felt guilty for lying, and then you found out the truth and got mad at me, and then stopped talking to me altogether. Making me a hollow shell of my fake persona, crying in the bathtub with hot water spraying down from the shower head above, trying to burn out my grief.
What I'm doing with my life
Working retail at nights. Serving the finest pimps, drug dealers, hoes, strippers, drunks, crackheads, d***heads, and the rest of Colorado Springs' finest nighttime clientele.
I also volunteer at various animal shelters. Right now I'm cleaning out kennels, but they have assured me that one day I could work my way up to
euthanization.
That's me, volunteer of the month, Pet Vet Kevorkian.
I'm really good at
Responsibility, photography, sleeping, cleaning the mildew that you find between the bathroom tiles with a toothbrush, and brushing my teeth...with the
same toothbrush.
The first thing(s) people usually notice about me
My full head of hair.
My favorite books, movies, music, and food
Listening to Lady GaGa/Justice/Crystal Castles/Kylie Minogue/Alex Young/Madonna
The six things I could never do without
Brown rice, diet soda, family, my pets, mountains, anti-psychotic painkillers...ok, they're really only aspirins, but it's always nice to dream.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
what I'm doing when I'm doing it, and when I'm not I'm probably sleeping...or I could be at work, because I'm pretty much a brain dead zombie while I'm there.
Otherwise I'm pretty analytical in how I think about things.
On a typical Friday night I am
Having the time of my life selling hypodermic needles and drano to the bums that come in on the night shift. Just doing my part to save the human race and promote world peace.
That is unless I have it off, then I am getting my swerve on at the club, and then coming home and chugging diet root beer with my cats until I pass out, then puking up hairballs in the toilet with them the next morning.
Like I say, live fast, die some other day. I would say die young, but I'm past that point in my life. Now I'm just looking for someone to die with some day that's not today or tomorrow, hopefully not even the day after that, but someday hopefully a long time from now when scientists have discovered the key to longevity, and then I guess we won't really die, but will live forever, because by living that long they will have already advanced longevity to living forever...so I guess what I really want is someone to live forever with...but that doesn't really belong in this section on what I'm doing on Friday nights, so mentally cut and paste this paragraph into the "You should message me if" section, but that section is kind of dumb, because girls don't message guys first just as a rule of thumb, because well, that's just not the way it works. So I should just put in that section not to ever message me unless I message you first, because you were never going to message me first anyways. At least then I can feel like I have some control over the situation.
The most private thing I'm willing to admit here
I a bit obsessed with my diet.
I'm also not into a lot of manly man activities...except grunting, wearing flannel, and clubbing future partners over the head and dragging them back to my cave.
You should message me if
You like handsome bald guys, dead fish, cleaning toilets, or if you want to get to know my serious side...well, that might be taking it a bit far.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Message me if you are a nice or sarcastic or both girl who might enjoy animals, the environment, the outdoors, photography, gaming, intellectual stuff, recycling, vegetarianism, or any other assorted tree hugger things.
First Date
Hunt and kill little bunnies to feed to my cats. Climb a mountain and roll boulders onto the highways below. Walk little old ladies halfway across the street, and then abandon them...or just the dinner, coffee, walk, hike thing if you wanna get all traditional about it...geez