Putting on a Good Show
My movie plans went well. I saw John Tucker Must Die and A Scanner Darkly. I bussed to Mayfair and had just enough time to get inside, get my ticket, find a seat, and see a couple previews. There must have been a lot cuz I think I got in like 7 minutes after they started. There were kids everywhere. Like... teenager kids. I felt weird cuz I was probably one of the oldest people there. If we're talking a crowd of people where one is 38 and one is 35 it doesn't matter, but when it comes down to 20 and17, it's odd. But oh well.
I also felt odd cuz I haven't been to a movie alone in a while. I'm so used to having Ben (or Allie or Nate) that I felt like a loser. I never used to feel like a loser. There was this fat black guy (who looked more like a 16) there alone as well. There was him, two seats, two girls, and then the row was done. I asked if he was saving seats for anyone and he said no. It was like, do I sit next to him and possibly get in his way? Or do I set next to the girls and make them upset cuz now there's a fat kid next to them and upset the guy cuz he thinks I'm either racist or anti-other-fat-people. Accch. Why do I care about such things? He made a comment as I looked down that he spilled his soda. That he did. So that just made me feel bad for him. I couldn't put my backpack in it, so I put it in the seat between me and him. It was like dropping a wall, and again I felt bad. For no discernable reason. Sigh.
I was pretty pleased with the movie. I told Ben later that it was like Mean Girls, only not as good. But close. And it's awlays fun watching 23 year olds playing high schoolers. Always. I noticed some shirts in the movie and in the auditorium itself and thought about how trendy splotchy designs in obscure parts of the shirt used to be so indie and now it's really mainstream. Then I felt bad because a lot of people look weird trying to pull it off because I have certain connotations to it in my head.
I was texting with Jeremy during the movie cuz he was looking for Ben and Dan. I figured Dan wasn't answering his phone because he's Dan, and Ben wasn't answering his cuz he was on a riding lawn mower.
Texted Allie about everyone in the world being at the movie and she said that everyone in the world was in fact at the Fray concert with her and Nate.
At Barnes N Noble I saw, as I always do, how KT Tunstall's CD Eye to the Telescope is 16.99. And I got it for 8 dollars. And it's fantastic. Haha bitches.
I saw Ben down at the Starbucks, which I was on my way to as well so I walked up behind him and grabbed his ass. Well, you know, as best as I could considering he doesn't have one. His response "I guess we think alike." After sitting and explaining, largely about content from my last entry, we drove his car around to the other side of the mall.
Bobby Canavale has a new movie coming out. He plays a supporting role, so good thing the movie (The Night Listener) looks good, cuz I'm effin' seeing it.
A Scanner Darkly was meh. I was too distracted looking at it to pay much attention to what they were saying. Possibly because what they were saying didn't interest me. It's like, yes, you're addicts and you act strange, I've seen this on Law and Order. Ben said it portrayed addicts very well and it was different from Law and Order. I was like I guess. It just didn't ever really interest me that much. Maybe I was more inclined to passivity cuz I was tired. I fell asleep for like five to ten minutes towards the end, but I didn't really miss much. We were both just kind of like eh.
Afterwards, by the time we were in my driveway I was telling Ben about how I talk to people knowing where I want theh conversation to go, sometimes. And ask them questions I know the answer to to see how much information they'll give me. Or to see if they're going to lie. I do that a lot at work. I was telling Ben about how just earlier in the night I gauged his honesty on something and he told me an instance of where he did it as well.
Ben made a comment about his busy day tomorrow. He has to get to Mayfair to get his mom a presentn and then to dan's to get his shit and so on.
And so on.
"So what are you doing tomorrow that's so busy?"
"[talk talk talk] and then I need to pack a bit. And Dan and I will probably hang out with Shaz."
*turns head to look at Ben, not with any sort of expression on my face though*
"I don't really want to come out and get you and then take you home on Sunday though."
"Yeah, i figured you would say that. During the movie actually I was thinking about work tomorrow. And how I'll be tired. Then I'll come home and pack a bit. And how then I'll want to hang out. And I knew you three would be doing something. But then I wondered if you would even bother calling me. Or tell me unless I asked. And I decided that you woudln't. Because you wouldn't want to go out of your way for me. So I was already getting pissed at you for something you hadn't done yet I guess. And then I thought about how Nate goes out of his way for me all the time when he comes to get me or take me home."
*Ben was smiling but I think I might have taken him back at least a bit by how well I knew what was going to happen* "Well its not that I don't want to go out of my way like Nate..."
"Well you'd have to be up early anyway to get a start on finishing your packing, cuz it's gonna take a while."
"...."
"But oh well. Ok, I need sleep now so goodnight." *gets out of car*
"So when you find out your hours for Tuesday send me a text or something."
"Ok." *enters house*
I wonder if I got the feeling across correctly. It wasn't bitchy at all. It was just very matter of fact. You know, matter of factly telling me that he isn't going to hang out with me cuz he doesn't feel like driving to my house. And that he's going to hang out with Dan and Shaz yet again without me getting a chance to come along. Which appears to be his stock in trade as of late.
But it doesn't matter, because stock in Ben has been going down slowly anyway.
Because I'm not stupid.
I also felt odd cuz I haven't been to a movie alone in a while. I'm so used to having Ben (or Allie or Nate) that I felt like a loser. I never used to feel like a loser. There was this fat black guy (who looked more like a 16) there alone as well. There was him, two seats, two girls, and then the row was done. I asked if he was saving seats for anyone and he said no. It was like, do I sit next to him and possibly get in his way? Or do I set next to the girls and make them upset cuz now there's a fat kid next to them and upset the guy cuz he thinks I'm either racist or anti-other-fat-people. Accch. Why do I care about such things? He made a comment as I looked down that he spilled his soda. That he did. So that just made me feel bad for him. I couldn't put my backpack in it, so I put it in the seat between me and him. It was like dropping a wall, and again I felt bad. For no discernable reason. Sigh.
I was pretty pleased with the movie. I told Ben later that it was like Mean Girls, only not as good. But close. And it's awlays fun watching 23 year olds playing high schoolers. Always. I noticed some shirts in the movie and in the auditorium itself and thought about how trendy splotchy designs in obscure parts of the shirt used to be so indie and now it's really mainstream. Then I felt bad because a lot of people look weird trying to pull it off because I have certain connotations to it in my head.
I was texting with Jeremy during the movie cuz he was looking for Ben and Dan. I figured Dan wasn't answering his phone because he's Dan, and Ben wasn't answering his cuz he was on a riding lawn mower.
Texted Allie about everyone in the world being at the movie and she said that everyone in the world was in fact at the Fray concert with her and Nate.
At Barnes N Noble I saw, as I always do, how KT Tunstall's CD Eye to the Telescope is 16.99. And I got it for 8 dollars. And it's fantastic. Haha bitches.
I saw Ben down at the Starbucks, which I was on my way to as well so I walked up behind him and grabbed his ass. Well, you know, as best as I could considering he doesn't have one. His response "I guess we think alike." After sitting and explaining, largely about content from my last entry, we drove his car around to the other side of the mall.
Bobby Canavale has a new movie coming out. He plays a supporting role, so good thing the movie (The Night Listener) looks good, cuz I'm effin' seeing it.
A Scanner Darkly was meh. I was too distracted looking at it to pay much attention to what they were saying. Possibly because what they were saying didn't interest me. It's like, yes, you're addicts and you act strange, I've seen this on Law and Order. Ben said it portrayed addicts very well and it was different from Law and Order. I was like I guess. It just didn't ever really interest me that much. Maybe I was more inclined to passivity cuz I was tired. I fell asleep for like five to ten minutes towards the end, but I didn't really miss much. We were both just kind of like eh.
Afterwards, by the time we were in my driveway I was telling Ben about how I talk to people knowing where I want theh conversation to go, sometimes. And ask them questions I know the answer to to see how much information they'll give me. Or to see if they're going to lie. I do that a lot at work. I was telling Ben about how just earlier in the night I gauged his honesty on something and he told me an instance of where he did it as well.
Ben made a comment about his busy day tomorrow. He has to get to Mayfair to get his mom a presentn and then to dan's to get his shit and so on.
And so on.
"So what are you doing tomorrow that's so busy?"
"[talk talk talk] and then I need to pack a bit. And Dan and I will probably hang out with Shaz."
*turns head to look at Ben, not with any sort of expression on my face though*
"I don't really want to come out and get you and then take you home on Sunday though."
"Yeah, i figured you would say that. During the movie actually I was thinking about work tomorrow. And how I'll be tired. Then I'll come home and pack a bit. And how then I'll want to hang out. And I knew you three would be doing something. But then I wondered if you would even bother calling me. Or tell me unless I asked. And I decided that you woudln't. Because you wouldn't want to go out of your way for me. So I was already getting pissed at you for something you hadn't done yet I guess. And then I thought about how Nate goes out of his way for me all the time when he comes to get me or take me home."
*Ben was smiling but I think I might have taken him back at least a bit by how well I knew what was going to happen* "Well its not that I don't want to go out of my way like Nate..."
"Well you'd have to be up early anyway to get a start on finishing your packing, cuz it's gonna take a while."
"...."
"But oh well. Ok, I need sleep now so goodnight." *gets out of car*
"So when you find out your hours for Tuesday send me a text or something."
"Ok." *enters house*
I wonder if I got the feeling across correctly. It wasn't bitchy at all. It was just very matter of fact. You know, matter of factly telling me that he isn't going to hang out with me cuz he doesn't feel like driving to my house. And that he's going to hang out with Dan and Shaz yet again without me getting a chance to come along. Which appears to be his stock in trade as of late.
But it doesn't matter, because stock in Ben has been going down slowly anyway.
Because I'm not stupid.