(no subject)
I remember my mom when I was little. She was a much better person then. A lot like I am now, I think; a horrible show-off and absolutely unbearable at times, but so enthusiastic and fun to be around. In spring we used to open all the windows and doors and clean the house; we'd play music so loud that the whole neighborhood could hear and we'd sing as we worked. She had the coolest taste in music, she loved everything from the Moody Blues, to Bob Dylan, to Ace of Base, to REM. On my birthday she would bake cupcakes for me to bring to school for my classmates. We would sit on the couch together and read, or sometimes she would play a Nintendo RPG. I don't know why, but I really enjoyed just watching her play. We would put on records and dance around the house. In summer we used to walk to my school and have picnics on the playground; we would play backgammon (her favourite) and Yahtzee (mine). She never went easy on me, even though I was a little kid; she always played to win. It made me feel so grown-up. On weekends we would stay up until early morning watching movies. Around Christmas we would play really obscure Chrismas music and drive all over town looking at the lights.
That was a different time. A time when she wasn't so angry and critical and distrustful and judgemental; or a time when I wasn't so sensitive to it. I miss her though. So many people I know have such good relationships with their mothers. I wish that I could have retained that. Of everything that I've lost as I've grown up, I think that I miss my mom the most.
That was a different time. A time when she wasn't so angry and critical and distrustful and judgemental; or a time when I wasn't so sensitive to it. I miss her though. So many people I know have such good relationships with their mothers. I wish that I could have retained that. Of everything that I've lost as I've grown up, I think that I miss my mom the most.