Review: Real Vampires Have Curves
Real Vampires Have Curves
Author: Gerry Bartlett
Retail: $14.00
"Book Description
What-did you think all vamps were pale, thin and brooding? Don't I wish.
Gloriana St. Clair is an eternally "full-figured" vampire-she just happened to be bloating when a sexy Scotsman sank his teeth into her. She and said Scot-Angus Jeremiah Campbell III, aka Jeremy Blade-have been on and off again for centuries, currently off. A couple hundred years has taught them how to press each other's buttons-in good ways and bad.
Glory's headed for Austin and a new business venture: Vintage Vamp's Emporium. After all, she loves clothes, and she is an antique. Only problem is, there's a billionaire techno-freak vampire hunter on the loose. Blade's in total he-vampire mode, and wants Glory to move in with him so he can "protect" her. But it's time for this vamp to explore her own powers "
Real Vampires is a nice blend of chick-lit and paranormal romance, a good mix of romance, sex, action and mystery to keep the reader turning the next page. Definitely a fluff read, nothing dark or emotion provoking but the characters are fun enough that you keep wanting to find out what's going to go on next. No new Vampire mythos here, Bartlett basically contends that Vampires are just like everyone else, with a few limitations. No daylight, reflection, or eating, and an all liquid diet, otherwise they suffer the same weaknesses and failings of their mortal counterparts.
Glory is full figured and owns a vintage clothing store! A lot of the story is about the status of the relationship between her and Blade, while they've been on and off, it seems like Blade wants to take the next step, marriage however Glory isn't so sure, forever can be a long time to live with that kind of mistake. One of their biggest bone of contention is Blade's tendency to over protect and treat her somewhat like an errant child, Glory on the other hand can't help but feel Blade couldn't possibly want her due to her less than fashionly thin body and that this is just a phase brought on by the death of his best friend Mac, and that Glory is being targeted by the same hunter, Westwood.
Add into the mix, Mac's widow Mara who has taken up residence with Blade, under the guise being grief stricken at the loss of her soul mate, accepts Blade's protection. Mara would definitely be willing to be Glory's replacement in Blade's eyes and certainly is not above getting rid of her if she thought she could do it and not get caught. I really don't like Mara, uber bitch and hopefully Westwood will get her next. Then there is Damien, Glory's landlord and brother to Flo her roomie. Damien started out making a play for Glory to in a competitive move against Blade, but now is motivated by the fact that Glory has resisted falling for his charms. Damien is definitely the sexy badboy, with just a smidge of sleaze tossed in. And finally Valdez, Blade has provided Glory with a protector through out the ages in the form of dogs, each one named Valdez. He can speak and is a fierce protector, strong as a vampire and twice as mean when someone tries to harm Glory. He reports to Blade mentally which is yet one more thing to hold against the sexy Scot, although she really has loved each Valdez and the current one has saved her life twice in this book alone.
Vampires are being hunted in Austin on two fronts. A human named Westwood who has unlimited funds and technology at his disposal, and has developed some secret way to spot Vampires. Out for the thrill of the hunt more than anything else Westwood is not above taunting them to flush out his prey, the Vamps. Also there is a vampire who stakes other vamps with a stake in the shape of a cross. In an effort to catch the hunters Blade, Mara, and some vamps plan to bribe someone to infiltrate and find a weakness in Westwood's camp to get a chance at getting rid of him. Glory on the other front help design ways to protect themselves and identify the rogue killer vamp. Also deciding to stop being helpless she embraces her vampirism and starts practicing her vamp powers in order to prove to Blade she can take care of herself.
Things come to a head on Halloween of course, when Westwood crashes Damien's big party, in a stand off where Glory is being held at stake point by his goons and Westwood held by Blade's knife to his throat, things look very grim. Glory, after unsuccessfully trying to get Blade to forfeit her and kill Westwood, she then attempts using some of her Vamp powers and gets free. In the melee Blade let's Westwood escape to get to Glory, a fact that will surely piss off Mara. oh darn. lol
Unfortunately there is no HEA for any of our vamps although things are left on basically a good note. The next book, Real Vampires Live Large, is due out in July 07. There is a short excerpt in the back of Real Vampires Have Curves, enough to make me wish it were July already!
Real Vamps is a fluffy romp, quick paced with equal parts romance and action, I really enjoyed it. The retail price is 14.00 but I see Amazon has it reduced to $11.90 a definite bargain for the over sized paperback. Just a note I do like the over sized paperback, and see it is a growing trend especially in the paranormal & romance genres. A bit larger than a mass or trade paperback, but definitely smaller than a hardcover and with slightly larger print which these old peepers really appreciate!
Great reading for the beach or the pool for spring break or the upcoming summer. I definitely recomend it to any fan of chick-lit and or paranormal romance. If you like MaryJanice Davidson, Katie Macalister, or Lyndsay Sands you definitely will enjoy this one.
I give Real Vampires Have Curves
1/2