No longer left behind
So if there are two people that like each other then they should be together right? I see no faults in that plan but for some reason there is. But whatever. I found someone who showed me that they care and want to know the truth about me. He already knows shit that no one, not even my brother knows about me. For some reason I felt compelled to tell him shit that I could never bring myself to say in the past. Everyday since I've been gone I've thought about him. I want to be able to see him everynight like I have been, I got so used to that. The only thing that makes that better is knowing that I'm gonna see him the day I get home. I could have passed out from happiness the day that he text me. He was the first person the say something to me with the exception of Holly. I'm tired of holding back cuz of someone else's feelings, he found someone new and just because I like his "brother" he's gonna say no. If he really honestly loved me like he says that he does then he would want me to be happy, no matter who it is with. But for somereason that isn't the case. I've tried my best to stay calm with him and everything that we went through but it's hard. I understand that the baby was important to him too but he didn't go through what I did. He didn't have to walk by protesters and all their pictures to go through one of the hardest things a girl can go through. I'm the one that has to deal with the shame and tourment of what happened, and it hurt me enough that I still can't bring myself to tell my best friend what happened. But somehow we're even. Well you know what, fuck it, I'm tired of his shit, I don't have to be connected to him anymore and if he's gonna have such a problem with me finding someone else then he can just look away cuz he has no control over my life. I kept my mouth shut so far about a lot of stuff that I know he's said and done and it can stay that way if he backs off but if not then I don't know how much longer I can keep quiet.
Well on a happier note, I'm really enjoying my time in Alaska so far. It's great to see my dad again but I'm getting kind of home sick. I know that I don't see my dad that often so that's making it a lot easier on me. I just kinda wish that he didn't have to work while I was here. Either way it's been great seeing him and all of my other family up here. I haven't really done that much so far cuz my dad has been working and all but this weekend we're supposed to go the wolf ranch so that I can play with the wolves. I can't wait I haven't been there in so many years. Other than that though we haven't really planned on anything else we've been going day by day. Only like 11 more days until I leave though so I'll see everyone soon.
Well on a happier note, I'm really enjoying my time in Alaska so far. It's great to see my dad again but I'm getting kind of home sick. I know that I don't see my dad that often so that's making it a lot easier on me. I just kinda wish that he didn't have to work while I was here. Either way it's been great seeing him and all of my other family up here. I haven't really done that much so far cuz my dad has been working and all but this weekend we're supposed to go the wolf ranch so that I can play with the wolves. I can't wait I haven't been there in so many years. Other than that though we haven't really planned on anything else we've been going day by day. Only like 11 more days until I leave though so I'll see everyone soon.