(no subject)
Things are a little better now, Im doing ok and it seems like i'll get through. My mother is the one that worries us... she won't eat, she won't come out, all she does is lay in bed... we understand that it's hard for her since she's used to my father being around all the time and then he's gone just like that, the last thing we need is her getting sick but we are trying to make the best for her and my little brother. We saw my father today, we went to visit him in the morning, he looked different for some reason even though it was hard to see each other with a fucking metal mesh-covered window between us and only 5 small holes in the middle so we could exchange words, my mother couldn't even touch him at least once more, it sucked. We also received his first letter today which I just finished reading a few minutes ago... even in this situation he still keeps his sense of humor, we plan to write back to him of course. So yea everything seems to be okay right now, hopefully my mother won't get sick. I've been looking for a job ever since, I desperately need one now, I've applied at many places already, im just waiting for a phone call. In the meantime a friend of mine is helping me out with a job. It's only temporary but it will pay $400 a week so that's not bad, but yea we'll see how that goes. Thanks to all my friends who were here for me when I needed them, it's nice to find out which are the ones who stick around and those who are fake. Lately I haven't been keeping track of the days but all I know is that the weekend is here. I have nothing planned for it though and I will probrably end up doing nothing but it's ok, I think I have to get used to it now. Lately i've been thinking alot about myself and it's depressing how my life has shaped up so far and im just going to say that after this is all over, I won't be the same anymore, I wont become a total waste, I will be a new person... it has to be now, I need to change for the better.