(no subject)
OK. I'd like to speak about a very important, albeit understated, issue.
Pretending to be a tree, much like calligraphy and soap bubbles, is a lost art in our modern society. But unlike ornate penmanship or the prestigious formation of fatty acid alkali, pretending to be a tree has endured and proven to be practical in its use over the centuries. In such dire circumstance as on-the-spot camouflage when fleeing ninjas, or rock band photoshoots. And so, I've comprised a mini-tutorial intended to educate an enlightened audience about the dos and don'ts of Tree Pretending (from here on referred to as treetending). Please observe the photo provided. Only one out of the four people so charmingly depicted actually knows how to be a tree properly.
Is it Camilla Wynne Ingr, stanced at the center of the picture? No, it is not. As talented as she may be, she has unwittingly made a very obvious error: trees hardly, if ever, look at the camera. Being self-conscious should be the first thing one sheds when treetending, no matter how silly you think you're being, or how pleased you are with yourself at the time.
Let's move on to Jordan Robson-Cramer, the drummer featured on the upper left. He doesn't have it down either. Trees, known to stand around for decades at a time, scarcely look uncertain or inquisitive while doing it. Questioning the nature of being has its place in the world, but trees tend to be averse to philosophising, and most even look down upon it with much distaste. Faux pas much?
Spencer Krug, sprawled at the bottom left of the photograph, almost had it! He was really quite close. But that grin and those eager fingers give him away as a meagre human. He's enjoying himself far too much, and while this sloppy camouflage may outwit an amateur ninja, the other trees would spot him in a second. No cigar!
Michael Doerksen, top right, is the only one doing treetending any justice. Observe a master at work: in the moment, accepting, easily dismissed & humble.
With this I wrap up the tutorial which, on the whole, may or may not have been an excuse to gush about my arbori-fixation, spread awareness about the increasingly growing rate of death by ninja(!), and inadvertently rave about "Random Spirit Lover," which has somehow creeped its way into my top 5 albums list. So good! And truly weird! And layers of scary what-the-fuck hidden behind walls!
Pretending to be a tree, much like calligraphy and soap bubbles, is a lost art in our modern society. But unlike ornate penmanship or the prestigious formation of fatty acid alkali, pretending to be a tree has endured and proven to be practical in its use over the centuries. In such dire circumstance as on-the-spot camouflage when fleeing ninjas, or rock band photoshoots. And so, I've comprised a mini-tutorial intended to educate an enlightened audience about the dos and don'ts of Tree Pretending (from here on referred to as treetending). Please observe the photo provided. Only one out of the four people so charmingly depicted actually knows how to be a tree properly.
Is it Camilla Wynne Ingr, stanced at the center of the picture? No, it is not. As talented as she may be, she has unwittingly made a very obvious error: trees hardly, if ever, look at the camera. Being self-conscious should be the first thing one sheds when treetending, no matter how silly you think you're being, or how pleased you are with yourself at the time.
Let's move on to Jordan Robson-Cramer, the drummer featured on the upper left. He doesn't have it down either. Trees, known to stand around for decades at a time, scarcely look uncertain or inquisitive while doing it. Questioning the nature of being has its place in the world, but trees tend to be averse to philosophising, and most even look down upon it with much distaste. Faux pas much?
Spencer Krug, sprawled at the bottom left of the photograph, almost had it! He was really quite close. But that grin and those eager fingers give him away as a meagre human. He's enjoying himself far too much, and while this sloppy camouflage may outwit an amateur ninja, the other trees would spot him in a second. No cigar!
Michael Doerksen, top right, is the only one doing treetending any justice. Observe a master at work: in the moment, accepting, easily dismissed & humble.
With this I wrap up the tutorial which, on the whole, may or may not have been an excuse to gush about my arbori-fixation, spread awareness about the increasingly growing rate of death by ninja(!), and inadvertently rave about "Random Spirit Lover," which has somehow creeped its way into my top 5 albums list. So good! And truly weird! And layers of scary what-the-fuck hidden behind walls!