Ass hurts
I really need to grow some ass cuz it hurts to sit down lol. Speaking of ass...
I just don't get it. Just when I was starting to believe that I was becoming asexual, I slipped and fell back into the pool of...f-ed up emotions.
I really genuinely miss my ex. I miss being near him, I miss his scent, the way we used to cuddle together before getting down to biz...etc etc. Some of these boys in my neighborhood skate up and down my street everyday. Everytime I hear the skateboard wheels rolling down the pavement, I get excited at the thought of Andy. And then of course, I go back to the sad face.
When we were actually together, I admit, I did take him for granted. But at the time, I was under a lot of stress. He says that he understands yet he can't deny the fact that his feelings towards me have changed because of it. I had a hard time juggling everything all at once. Now that I can finally make some time for a relationship, he's not interested. As a matter of fact, he didn't seem to care much about me. Whatever happened to all those sweet things he once told me? Were they lies? Or was I that bad towards the end? I just can't figure it out. How can you deeply love someone one minute and then turn around and just forget? Am I the one taking crazy pills? Because I still love him! Why can't he just give me a chance?? Why am I left to suffer? Was it such a crime that I was working hard to achieve something big in my life? Now he drinks heavier and rarely ever talks to me. It makes me wonder what is going on with him...
I guess I'm just lonely.
I just don't get it. Just when I was starting to believe that I was becoming asexual, I slipped and fell back into the pool of...f-ed up emotions.
I really genuinely miss my ex. I miss being near him, I miss his scent, the way we used to cuddle together before getting down to biz...etc etc. Some of these boys in my neighborhood skate up and down my street everyday. Everytime I hear the skateboard wheels rolling down the pavement, I get excited at the thought of Andy. And then of course, I go back to the sad face.
When we were actually together, I admit, I did take him for granted. But at the time, I was under a lot of stress. He says that he understands yet he can't deny the fact that his feelings towards me have changed because of it. I had a hard time juggling everything all at once. Now that I can finally make some time for a relationship, he's not interested. As a matter of fact, he didn't seem to care much about me. Whatever happened to all those sweet things he once told me? Were they lies? Or was I that bad towards the end? I just can't figure it out. How can you deeply love someone one minute and then turn around and just forget? Am I the one taking crazy pills? Because I still love him! Why can't he just give me a chance?? Why am I left to suffer? Was it such a crime that I was working hard to achieve something big in my life? Now he drinks heavier and rarely ever talks to me. It makes me wonder what is going on with him...
I guess I'm just lonely.