Bummer.
Lately I've been wondering if I've really just fucked things up so well for myself that the dick that got shoved so high up my ass literally ripped me a new one.
A nice, shiny new 2007 model high-definition wide screen lateral viscosity sound wave light motion sensor activated HOLE OF MASS DESTRUCTION.
Shoved so high it went all the way past my sphincter so that it fucked my intestines and its ejaculate burst, nay, exploded through my poor, weary, tired, aching, and profusely bleeding heart.
I'm sorry to sound like such a cynical bitch right now. Are you kidding me? This isn't even cynical. This is real. I keep biting my tongue all the time, holding it all in, but I can't anymore. The blood's risen to the surface and it's turning into one nasty looking congealed mass of a bruise. Here, poke it. It's GROSS.
But before I go on about how fucked up I am, I'm gonna talk about something nice and sweet. Because I should. It's selfish of me to talk about my own fucked up self right now seeing as how the past week has been pretty wonderful.
A nice, shiny new 2007 model high-definition wide screen lateral viscosity sound wave light motion sensor activated HOLE OF MASS DESTRUCTION.
Shoved so high it went all the way past my sphincter so that it fucked my intestines and its ejaculate burst, nay, exploded through my poor, weary, tired, aching, and profusely bleeding heart.
I'm sorry to sound like such a cynical bitch right now. Are you kidding me? This isn't even cynical. This is real. I keep biting my tongue all the time, holding it all in, but I can't anymore. The blood's risen to the surface and it's turning into one nasty looking congealed mass of a bruise. Here, poke it. It's GROSS.
But before I go on about how fucked up I am, I'm gonna talk about something nice and sweet. Because I should. It's selfish of me to talk about my own fucked up self right now seeing as how the past week has been pretty wonderful.