Praying to be good enough and have enough
I have a midterm (a late one...?) tomorrow in Adolescent Psychology annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd..it's late and I haven't studied for it at all. Ohhhh well. I guess I can go study fairly soon.
I didn't have to go to work today so that made me happy. ugh..the life of being single..kind of sucks in the sense that you don't know where you fit in sometimes. You want someone to call you at night (not every night) just to catch up or whatnot. I miss the gf-life sometimes. It doesn't matter so much as I am getting out more and talking more. I skipped my very first class last Monday. I didn't say anything (prolly forgot) but it was fun. I met my friend, Jen, who is HI-larious and I NEED to hang out with her some more. She is so much like me in that pretty-weird-smart-sweet-badass charm. OH and she's funny. Glad she's my friend on myspace since I never see her on campus..i'll just have to send her something..humhumhum.
Cleaned my car out today. Inside and Out. I went to the carwash a couple days ago for $4 but that didn't do squat for my windows. There was still crap on them. So today I did it by hand. I did such an awesome job. I even vacuumed the inside of my car and the inside of the windows. Organized my school stuff, too. Maybe being organized will help with some of my classes? uhm..so somehow i have an A in adolescent psych, an A in yoga, and an A in statistics. I'm pretty sure I have a C or less in History and a C or less in ASL2. oh well. I don't like history (i like the people in there...) and ASL is just annoying now. I interpret something a bit differently and all of a sudden everything is wrong. I'm not the only person who has falled behind, but still it sucks that the people I started out being horrible with is kicking ass and I'm still horrible. AND my parents sign. I've tried talking to them and their confused by my signs. They think the teachers way of signing is weird..and my dad's parents were Deaf..so yeah. oh well-o.
Buccs this weekend. I'm pretty stoked to see my friends again. I really want to see the hornline/drumline because I really don't know when I'll see everyone again in case I make Boston. If I make Boston, the next camp for Buccs is drill and such and I'll really have no need to be there. I'm nervous as all heck. My grades have been falling, my job is shit, I don't have a lot of money, my organization skills financially are out the window AND NOW I need $1500 for corps (if I make it), $75 registration, and more plane tickets if I'm asked back. I need my money from the federal govt now..and hurry.
Boston..
Boston Crusaders..
I am officially wigging out.
I had an awful dream that nobody liked me. I keep thinking my dance skills are shitty (which they aren't great) and that I won't be prepared. If I don't make it and I end up marching Bucs..I really don't want people to think I suck cuz I didn't make Boston. I am good. I'm decent and I really do try. But is that good enough for a junior corps like Boston?
I don't know...too late to wig out..i spent too much on that ticket and I'll bring my self esteem down lower. I'll just go, have a good time, make some friends, learn the work, and just have an awesome time becoming better in one weekend if that is all it is. I became better at a crossmen/cadets camp november in '04 for the season '05. I got some "abs" and they are still there..? hahaha If I can become a better dancer or jsut better in movement at Boston, if I learn some fun crazy ass work at Boston, I'll still come home excited that I at least tried. I became better over the summer at Buccs. I learned basics at Brunswick, worked hard at some camps, did corps over the summer, I'm not that bad. Besides..mike(cadets) and ryan(boston) think I'll have no trouble..which eases the angst a little bit.
I should have practiced today. It was light out..but I didn't. Instead, I cleaned my car, organized myself, and laid back. I should have practiced. Thank GODGODGOD I have this weekend!!!!!!! OMGosh thank YOU!
Ok..enough of that..time to go study what I can..
maybe clean my room?
I didn't have to go to work today so that made me happy. ugh..the life of being single..kind of sucks in the sense that you don't know where you fit in sometimes. You want someone to call you at night (not every night) just to catch up or whatnot. I miss the gf-life sometimes. It doesn't matter so much as I am getting out more and talking more. I skipped my very first class last Monday. I didn't say anything (prolly forgot) but it was fun. I met my friend, Jen, who is HI-larious and I NEED to hang out with her some more. She is so much like me in that pretty-weird-smart-sweet-badass charm. OH and she's funny. Glad she's my friend on myspace since I never see her on campus..i'll just have to send her something..humhumhum.
Cleaned my car out today. Inside and Out. I went to the carwash a couple days ago for $4 but that didn't do squat for my windows. There was still crap on them. So today I did it by hand. I did such an awesome job. I even vacuumed the inside of my car and the inside of the windows. Organized my school stuff, too. Maybe being organized will help with some of my classes? uhm..so somehow i have an A in adolescent psych, an A in yoga, and an A in statistics. I'm pretty sure I have a C or less in History and a C or less in ASL2. oh well. I don't like history (i like the people in there...) and ASL is just annoying now. I interpret something a bit differently and all of a sudden everything is wrong. I'm not the only person who has falled behind, but still it sucks that the people I started out being horrible with is kicking ass and I'm still horrible. AND my parents sign. I've tried talking to them and their confused by my signs. They think the teachers way of signing is weird..and my dad's parents were Deaf..so yeah. oh well-o.
Buccs this weekend. I'm pretty stoked to see my friends again. I really want to see the hornline/drumline because I really don't know when I'll see everyone again in case I make Boston. If I make Boston, the next camp for Buccs is drill and such and I'll really have no need to be there. I'm nervous as all heck. My grades have been falling, my job is shit, I don't have a lot of money, my organization skills financially are out the window AND NOW I need $1500 for corps (if I make it), $75 registration, and more plane tickets if I'm asked back. I need my money from the federal govt now..and hurry.
Boston..
Boston Crusaders..
I am officially wigging out.
I had an awful dream that nobody liked me. I keep thinking my dance skills are shitty (which they aren't great) and that I won't be prepared. If I don't make it and I end up marching Bucs..I really don't want people to think I suck cuz I didn't make Boston. I am good. I'm decent and I really do try. But is that good enough for a junior corps like Boston?
I don't know...too late to wig out..i spent too much on that ticket and I'll bring my self esteem down lower. I'll just go, have a good time, make some friends, learn the work, and just have an awesome time becoming better in one weekend if that is all it is. I became better at a crossmen/cadets camp november in '04 for the season '05. I got some "abs" and they are still there..? hahaha If I can become a better dancer or jsut better in movement at Boston, if I learn some fun crazy ass work at Boston, I'll still come home excited that I at least tried. I became better over the summer at Buccs. I learned basics at Brunswick, worked hard at some camps, did corps over the summer, I'm not that bad. Besides..mike(cadets) and ryan(boston) think I'll have no trouble..which eases the angst a little bit.
I should have practiced today. It was light out..but I didn't. Instead, I cleaned my car, organized myself, and laid back. I should have practiced. Thank GODGODGOD I have this weekend!!!!!!! OMGosh thank YOU!
Ok..enough of that..time to go study what I can..
maybe clean my room?