The Thrill of Defeat, Part Seven
"Princess Dolls are nice, but good friends are even nicer," she said. "Would
that little twerp's friends have dressed up like dolls for her if she'd lost? I
doubt it!"
"Yeah!" I laughed. "I just can't picture Ash or Brock donning kimonos for
Misty's sake!"
Guardian’s Song: Shall I spare you all a monologue about crossdressing and comic relief in shonen? I think I shall.
Jessie smiled at me and took my hand in her own. "So let the baby have her
bottle!
Guardian’s Song: *mutters* She’s twelve, you *beep*ing moron…
I've got something much better than a doll set!"
{snip more dialogue and sappy moments}
@->->-
Looking back, I regret not taking that chance to tell Jessie how I really felt
about her -- I know now that she was already in love with me at that point and
that she'd been testing the waters to see if I felt the same way about her. I
hadn't said or done anything to make her think I wasn't interested, but I'd
still been testing the waters at that point, too. It's actually kind of silly
when I think about it -- we were both madly in love with each other and
practically throwing ourselves at each other, but we were both too apprehensive
to pick up on any of it.
Guardian’s Song: *sigh* *moooope* If she could only write what she thought she was writing, this would actually be a decent fic. *throws up hands* So! Danged! Much! Wasted! Potential!
Suddenly, Jessie sighed contentedly and shifted in her sleep, snapping me from
my reverie. As I looked at the peaceful expression on her face, I was reminded
that we had overcome our fears and admitted our feelings.
Guardian’s Song: *presses fingers to temple* Wait. Actually, I think I know what she was trying to do. This may be attempting to mimic the structure of an anime scene, in which the above section would be a flashback.
…*double facepalm* ARGH! She is doing the equivalent of explaining basic social cues - under all the padding, this does have the structure of an anime episode of some sort, but she’s padding the thing out by explaining every single little nuance of this glance or that piece of dialogue, adding enormous hunks of dialogue to spell everything out further, and writing every action as mechanically as script directions!
Here, let me cut out all the junk from a large section:
“My eyes widened as I realized what she was holding. "You're on the pill?!"
She nodded. "Yes, you see, so we have nothing to worry about."
I breathed a sigh of relief and collapsed onto my back. "Thank goodness...."
…Our lips met again, this time in a more passionate kiss. When it ended, we held each other in a tight embrace, … Jessie resting her head on my chest. I smiled tenderly at her and planted another kiss on her forehead as she … let the beating of my heart lull her to sleep.
@->->-
Once Jessie had fallen asleep, I looked back at the starry night sky and reflected on what had happened tonight. It was kind of ironic -- if we'd actually had a chance to compete in the games, … we might not have had this beautiful experience!
That seems to be the story of our lives -- whenever things go wrong, Jessie and I seek comfort in each other, and our relationship becomes that much stronger!
…
So, maybe being "losers" isn't such a bad thing, after all!
…
As I laid there, holding Jessie in my arms and thinking about the wonderful opportunity our latest "defeat" had given us, I found my thoughts drifting back to another time that defeat had been better than victory for us -- the Princess Festival.
That had been about three months ago now, but I still remembered it like it was
yesterday. …
@->->-
It was bad enough that Psyduck had a stroke of dumb luck and beat Lickitung in the final round, but Misty blasting us out of the arena instead of being a gracious winner only added insult to injury! …
After our blast-off, Jessie told me and Meowth that she wanted to be alone for a while. … But when I looked into her tear-filled eyes, I knew that I had to do something...anything to make her feel better.
And that was when I had a brilliant idea!
Once Jessie had taken her leave, Meowth and I went back to town and bought a set of kimonos and a life-size display stand. I had to pay full price for everything since I'm a man (and believe me, it had been rather expensive), but I knew that it'd be worth every penny if I could make Jessie smile again.
On the way back from our shopping trip, Meowth and I saw Misty mailing her new Princess Dolls back to the Cerulean Gym and gloating about how jealous her sisters were going to be. … I tell you, I wanted nothing more than to slap Misty across the face and tell her they might have given her all of their broken hand-me-downs when she was little, but at least she'd had dolls -- Jessie hadn't even been lucky enough to have that! But I resisted the temptation -- I wasn't in the mood to get into another fight with those twerps, and cheering Jessie up was more important anyway.
When Meowth and I finally found Jessie again, she was sitting beneath a tree in the park, crying her … eyes out and lamenting yet another disappointing Princess Day. But the day wasn't over yet…!
Quickly, Meowth and I dressed ourselves and Arbok and Weezing in the kimonos we'd bought and set up the display stand. Once everything was ready, we went to Jessie and offered to be her doll set for the rest of the day. When she saw me dressed as the Emperor Doll, the tears of sorrow in her eyes became tears of joy. Then, she dressed up Lickitung, put her Empress Doll kimono back on, and joined us on the display stand.
As we all sat together, Jessie called me and the pokemon a bunch of living
dolls, and she even got a passerby to take our picture so that she could always remember what we'd done for her! …
That night, as the festivities were coming to a close, I treated Jessie to dinner at her favorite … restaurant. While we were eating, she told me that she was glad she'd lost the tournament. She explained that if she'd won the dolls, then I wouldn't have dressed up for her, and she'd have been robbed of the greatest prize of all.
My heart skipped a beat as I listened to her …
"Princess Dolls are nice, but good friends are even nicer," she continued. "Would that little twerp's friends have dressed up like dolls for her if she'd lost? I doubt it!"
… I laughed. …
Jessie smiled at me and took my hand in her own. "So let her have her dolls! I've got something much better than a doll set!" She paused for a moment and stuck her tongue out. "Besides, if I'd won, I would've had to have my picture taken with that Fiorello Cappuccino guy. And why would I want a hack like him when I've got you?"
My heart began to race …. Did she meant what I thought she meant?! I wondered.
Jessie's smile grew even wider than it already was as she cupped my chin in her free hand. "Thanks, James. You've made this the happiest Princess Day of all -- I couldn't ask for a better prince than you!" With that, she leaned closer and planted a kiss on my burning cheek.
I twined the fingers of our joined hands and rested my forehead against her own. "It was my pleasure, Jess," I whispered as I gazed lovingly into her sapphire eyes.
@->->-
Looking back, I regret not taking that chance to tell Jessie how I really felt about her … It's actually kind of silly when I think about it -- we were both madly in love with each other and practically throwing ourselves at each other, but we were both too apprehensive to pick up on any of it.
Suddenly, Jessie sighed contentedly and shifted in her sleep, snapping me from
my reverie.”
Am I the only one who thinks it reads much better with all the padding taken out?
It had been a long
time coming, but it had finally happened...and tonight, we'd gone a step further
and become lovers!
Lovers. There's just something so right about that word, I thought as I traced
the outlines of Jessie's beautiful face with the tip of my finger. It makes me
feel so close to you, Jess!
Guardian’s Song: *rolls eyes* Oh, you were only inside her. I can’t think of why that would make you feel close…
Jessie smiled and cuddled closer to me in response to my touch. "I love you,
James...." she muttered softly in her sleep.
I stroked her hair and planted a kiss atop her head. "I love you too, Jessie...I
love you, too...." I replied as I joined her in peaceful repose.
Guardian’s Song: “Peaceful repose”?
@->->-
I awoke the next morning to the feeling of the cool spring breeze caressing my
bare flesh and the sound of birds chirping in the trees.
Jerry: (Birds) SPEAROW-SPEAROW!
Tom: (Birds) FEAROW! FEEEEAROW!
Jerry: (James) On second thought… do you think that if we don’t move, they won’t see us?
When I opened my eyes,
I saw Jessie sitting next to me on the sleeping bag. She had a dreamy, far off
look in her eyes and a smile on her lips, as if she were meditating. Not wanting
to disturb her, I just laid there and admired the way the first light of dawn
was making her naked body glow with a warm, rosy hue and the way the morning
breeze was playing with her hair now that it had come loose from its normally
impeccable coif. But most of all, I admired the expression of complete happiness
and serenity on her face.
Jerry: …Er, do you have a different woman by the same name here?
It never ceases to amaze me how beautiful you are, Jessie, I said to myself as I
watched her. You're almost too beautiful to be real -- like a fiery angel come
to earth....
Guardian’s Song: Why do Suethors love the word “fiery” for Sues?
Also, oh, COME ON, Cori Falls, you KNOW you missed a chance to write “like a Moltres come to earth” there. This is the Pokémon world, it is easy to make up new, relevant-to-the-world expressions - why must you lean on clichés?
{snip dialogue}
"Well...now that I know you've been in love with me all these years, I was
looking back and thinking about why it took so long for you to tell me," she
said at length. "You know why it took me such a long time...you know why I was
afraid to admit my feelings...."
I nodded.
"....But I can't help but wonder if you were afraid to tell me because I was
pushing you away," she continued. "I look back at all the times I lost my temper
with you, all the times I was insensitive to you, all the times I hurt your
feelings...and it makes me think that you weren't just afraid of telling me how
you felt -- you were afraid of me!"
Guardian’s Song: *literally flails, lost for words, for around thirty seconds* Cori Falls, if you know what the canon characterizations are, why are you so bad at keeping to them?!
I gave Jessie a gentle shake. "Okay, now you're just being ridiculous!" I chided
her. "Do you really think I'd have stayed with you or found the courage to tell
you that I love you if I were afraid of you?!"
Jerry: *weakly* Please don’t make it sound so much like an abusive relationship…
"Then why is it that the only time our relationship seems to make any progress
is when I'm upset about something?" she asked. "I was riddled with guilt about
stealing from you on the morning you told me that you love me, and last night we
made love because I was depressed about missing out on Pokemon League. Is that
the only time you're not afraid to approach me? When I'm feeling vulnerable?"
Guardian’s Song: …*gapes and throws up hands* The fic is sporking itself!
"That's not it at all!"
"Then what is it?!"
I smoothed back Jessie's hair and brushed away the tears that were welling up in
her eyes. "You're looking at it from the wrong perspective, honey," I told her.
Guardian’s Song: (James) You are interrogating the text from the wrong perspective!
"Those milestones in our relationship didn't happen because you were vulnerable
-- they happened because I saw them as an opportunity for us to work through the
problem together and make our relationship stronger."
Tom: Y’ got a degree as a headshrink or something? Sounds like y’ know the buzzwords so well y’ can’t even speak in plain English when y’ try…
Jerry: What’s “plain English”?
*they pause*
Tom: Think ‘s an expression I heard once…
Guardian’s Song: Ahem. Let me de-fluff it, if you please?
“"Jessie, you’ve got it all wrong!" I said. "I didn’t approach you when you were feeling down because I only wasn’t afraid to approach you them - it was because I wanted to help you feel better!"”
versus
"You're looking at it from the wrong perspective, honey," I told her. "Those milestones in our relationship didn't happen because you were vulnerable -- they happened because I saw them as an opportunity for us to work through the problem together and make our relationship stronger."
Ten words shorter… and 79 characters shorter. Also - which sounds more like James?
She gave me a quizzical look.
"Jessica, you know I'd never take advantage of you," I said. "The morning we
admitted our feelings...when we made love last night -- all I did was remind you
that no matter how bad things get, I'll always be here for you, and I'll always
care about you. It's because you believed in me...because you trusted me enough
to open your heart and let me help you that those wonderful things happened."
Guardian’s Song: *chokes* I… oogh, I’ll accept that as ludicrously corny, but within the bounds of shonen dialogue…
Jessie smiled weakly and shook her head. "I...I never thought of it that way,
but you're right! I'm sorry for doubting you, James -- I guess I'm just a big
bundle of insecurities...."
Guardian’s Song: *under her breath* I blame the Pill. If she drops it, she’ll sober up quickly…
I smiled back and planted a kiss on her forehead. "It's okay, Jess. I don't
blame you -- you've been through more hard times than any normal person can be
expected to deal with. I think it's admirable how you've managed to cope with
everything.
Guardian’s Song: And I think that’s rather insulting to anyone who grew up poor and didn’t turn to a life of crime. Or, for that matter, stalking a prepubescent boy in an attempt to steal his beloved pet and turn it over to a criminal empire, possibly for resale… or possibly to be dissected to see what makes it tick.
I’m sorry if I’m disturbing any of your childhood memories, but it’s Cori Falls who insisted on dragging it into a more ‘realistic’ arena, and it’s her you ought to blame!
I just hope you'll always remember that you can trust me...and that
I'll always do whatever I can to make you feel better when you're in pain. I
hope that in time, the love we share can make some of your pain go away."
Jerry: I think I read something like this when I picked up a Harlequin romance -
Tom: Y’ read that stuff?
Jerry: Well, my dad does. He says he gets a lot of ideas from them…
Jessie gave my hand an affectionate squeeze and rested her head on my shoulder.
"I'm sure it will -- having you in my life is what gives me the strength to keep
going!"
I held Jessie closer and gave her another kiss. "Being with you has given me
more strength than I knew I had, too," I replied.
Guardian’s Song: James =/= Manly Shôjo Hero. He may act like a parody of one sometimes - there’s a difference.
Jessie smiled again and sank deeper into my embrace. For several minutes, the
two of us sat together in silence, savoring the closeness and warmth of our
bodies and taking in our surroundings.
"James?" Jessie muttered at length.
"Yeah?"
Jerry: (Jessie) Do you see Lickitung’s Pokéball anywhere?
(James) …
*ominous music plays*
(Announcer) Next time, on Pokémon: Team Rocket Version…
"You know what you said just now, about how far we've come in the past year?"
I nodded and inhaled the sweet fragrance of roses that permeated her hair.
Jerry: (James) ACHOOO! I’m allergic!
"Mmm-hmmm."
"It got me to thinking about the morning we admitted that we're in love with
each other."
"What about it?" I prompted.
She blushed. "While you were carrying me back to camp, I remember wondering if
your love would be able to help me cope with the things I've been through and
become a better person.
Guardian’s Song: *literally laughs* I take some of what I was saying about gender roles back - Jessie just spouted the lines normally belonging to a bad boy! ‘All I need to overcome the scars of my traumatic past is the love of a good woman - er, man…’
I remember looking into your beautiful green eyes and
hoping that I could become more like you -- sweet, gentle, caring...."
Guardian’s Song: So, to those who have read more of Cori Falls’ fics - am I correct in saying that Team Rocket got increasingly OOC as her fics went on, even before the split with canon? Did the manly!James/angsty!Jessie dynamic slowly appear, or was it there from the start?
I rested my forehead against hers. "Jessie, you're already sweet, gentle, and
caring -
Guardian’s Song: Okay, here we have the strict-gender-roles-even-if-they-completely-trample-all-previously-established-characterization again…
even if nobody else can see it,
Tom: Ain’t that called “psychosis”?
I've always known that's the real
you!"
Tom: An’ “delusions”?
I told her. "All those times at Pokemon Tech, on the road, and in the bike
gang when you stood by me, those times you saved my life on the St. Anne and at
Maiden's Peak...even the other day when our van went off the cliff, and I was
knocked unconscious! I never told you this, but hearing your voice is what woke
me up!
Tom: (James) I thought it was Jessiebelle, and every single one of my self-preservation instincts started screaming at the top of their lungs at once.
I could sense that you were there, and it made me feel safe.
Guardian’s Song: *snerk* Okay, now James is the vulnerable love interest. …I can’t believe it! She even swerves back and forth on the enforced-stereotyping stupidity! Good heavens, she’s Schrödinger’s Suethor!
No matter
what, you've always been there for me. Nobody has ever done anything like that
for me except you. You're an extraordinary woman, Jess."
Guardian’s Song: (James) You are definitely out of the ordinary.
{snip more sappy dialogue}
As Jessie pressed her body against mine, I felt myself becoming aroused again.
"Hey, Jess?" I muttered into her hair.
"Hmmm?" she muttered back.
A sly smile spread across my lips. "Want to show me how much you love me right
now?"
Catching on to my not-so-subtle hint,
Tom: An’ she didn’t catch on from yer “arousal”? How small IS it, anyway?
Jerry: *mumbling* …I need some brain bleach…
Jessie grinned. "Why, James! I thought
you'd never ask!"
As she touched her lips to mine, I lowered Jessie onto the sleeping bag and laid
myself on top of her. Then, we made love again as the sun rose.
Guardian’s Song: I… I can’t believe it. She didn’t go into tedious detail about it? I… Thank you, Cori Falls! I really appreciate it!