{mini-snip}
Merlin COMMA! he loved a nice pair of tits!
Albus: Yes, they are lovely birds.
He caressed the mounds, pinched the pert nipples, getting only a slight reaction. Then his hand ghosted down lower over the flat stomach to caress his bonded's lovely cock. It was a pretty rooster indeed. But it showed no sign of arousal. It was also a lazy rooster.
Lost somewhere in his own mind, I know how that feels. *hands him a map* Severus knew that he should make some attempt at a response. That he really should try to pretend that he wanted this. But he could not move. He felt paralyzed. With what little of his mind he could harness he prayed to any deity who might be listening that Dumbledore would just take what he wanted and not beat him.
Guardian’s Song: (Deities) Actually, we’re all kind of waiting for our ears to stop ringing after that awesome rock concert Apollo held (hey, we change with the times too, you know). Call back later or fax your request, would you? Thanks.
That he would not harm his child.
Seething, the old man let out a low growl. He would not allow such insolence to continue. Severus would react to his touch!
Ariana: Oh, that’s easy. *leans over and pokes Albus* …*pokes him again* …*pokes* *pokepokepokepokepokepokePOKEPOKEPOKEPOKEPOKEPOKEPOKEPO-*
Albus: *aggravated* Yes, Ariana, what is it?
Ariana: See? :D
Albus: …
His own cock was hard;
Ariana: *scratches head* I think I read in one of Alby’s books that you have to harvest mandrakes and do something to help with that…
it ached to return to that sweet, moist, NO COMMA NEEDED warmth he had only been able to taste once.
Ariana: Poor hungry rooster.
Aberforth: Ariana, whatever you do, don’t try to pet it.
Ariana: Why?
Aberforth: …Just don’t.
A smile spread over his face.
Taste? Hmmm….
Tossing his beard over his shoulder, he knelt between Severus' thighs. He ran his tongue over the younger man's balls. He mouthed them, and then traced the shaft with his tongue. He played checkers on the side. He twiddled his thumbs. He tried to guess the next lottery number. Still there was no reaction from Severus. His lovely slender body remained almost completely unresponsive. This angered the Headmaster beyond words.
Guardian’s Song: Yes, we could really tell from the flat prose, all right.
'You will not deny me your first-edition Pokémon cards, Severus.' He squeezed the limp organ, though this only garnered a grunt but no arousal. That was not what Albus Dumbledore wanted. He wanted the boy to whimper and moan, to wrap his long legs around his waist pulling him deeper (his waist pushing him deeper being unavailable), begging.
"You are mine!" He hissed aloud It’s widely known that the family speaks Parseltongue? as his eyes found the hairless slit hovering in midair just below the balls. 'The Greek Alphabet, I believe.'
Albus: I… what? Where did that come from?
Gellert: …Apparently Snape’s vagina is named The Greek Alphabet? …I’ve heard that some give their genitals nicknames, but that’s… rather odd, to say the least.
Albus: I suppose we cannot say that it was particularly abnormal for this story, but still…
He smirked to himself and after he had exposed the tender little nub hidden within
Guardian’s Song: Oi. The clitoris and penis are THE SAME THING in early fetal development. How it develops depends on the sex of the fetus, but it makes NO SENSE even for a hermaphrodite to have both. It’s like if Snape had acquired his breasts under his chest, such that he was four-nippled amongst his other problems.
…Er, yes, you could complain similarly about the scrotum and labia, but I suppose Snape could have just had the back of his scrotum shoved forward and the labia added behind it. At any rate, as long as he’s going to have both sets, you can sort of explain away finding room for the vagina. A clitoris and penis at the same time? AHAHAHAHAHA.
proceeded to use his tongue to trace the letters over it.
Gellert: …Why? Unless Snape is *snort* extremely unfortunate, his prick would provide a much larger surface area for licking letters. Can one even fit Greek letters on there?
Guardian’s Song: …I leave that exercise to the readers. Er, aside from that, I’d like to give credit where credit is due and note that Ravenkiss acknowledges at the end of the fic that she took the idea from some comedy routine or other (can’t look it up now). So she’s better than She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named in that respect, at least.
Caught by surprise at the intense sensation, Severus yelped and tried to escape. His body screamed: every nerve on fire.
Gellert: Reason #1203495 why the Muggle Rowling believes the older Albus might be an over-a-century-old virgin: His skill in the bedroom apparently may be likened to the Cruciatus. (This is completely inaccurate for Albus himself, of course.)
Albus: …
Dumbledore caught his hips and forced him to remain still. By the time he reached Omega, his prize was gasping for breath, and writhing as his body was forced to react.
He did not know he could feel anything so overwhelming! When the Death Eaters had taken their pleasure it had been little more then, cock in, pain, cock out, pain eased.
Gellert: What of thrusting?
Guardian’s Song: I’m more interested in the disturbing implications about Bellatrix.
None of them had cared if he felt anything.
Woobie!Snape Count: |||| |||| ||||
Now that talented tongue
Gellert: Yes, it is very talented. *leers*
Albus: *flushes*
Aberforth: I never needed to know that.
stroked and teased him mercilessly, SEMICOLON! NOT COMMA! it brought him to the very edge; he started to shudder with his climax, when he was forcibly pulled back. Don’t go gently into that good light! *pauses* Wait… This time Dumbledore caused trembling gasps and a confused whimper.
Very pleased with himself, the old man slid in two fingers, causing a moan, and arched back,
Albus: Er… I’m glad that my pleasuring skills are so impressive that they make me arch my back…
then when they were slick, withdrew them. These he then inserted into the other hole.
Added equipment aside, Dumbledore was well aware that Severus was gay, and that he had been trained to be a bitch. The Headmaster had watched from the shadows, as most of the Slytherin upper-classmen had used him while he was a student.
Albus: Wait. Most of the Slytherin upperclassmen had used ME while I was a student?
Guardian’s Song: The joys of pronoun misuse!
His mind almost drunk on images of a sweating, panting, whimpering Severus bucking against one of his housemates, begging to be fucked harder, as Dumbledore stood in the shadows and stroked himself through his robes.
Guardian’s Song: And of sentence fragments!
Gellert: Why not use Disillusionment Charms for even better concealment, such that one would not have to stroke oneself through one’s robes? For that matter, why bother with robes at all?
Albus: *turns bright red* Gellert!
Aberforth: Speaking from experience, Grindelwald?
Gellert: Hah. Not that you can prove.
Of course the old man was also well aware that after these swift, often violent sessions, when left alone and forgotten in the dungeons, or one of the towers, Severus would lay curled up in a heap and sob.
Woobie!Snape Count: |||| |||| |||| |
Dumbledore pushed in hard to stroke his prize's prostate, SEMICOLON, NOT COMMA! at the same time COMMA! he used his other hand to tickle the swollen clitoris, while he swallowed the now erect and weeping cock Poor rooster! D: to the root. …Rooster-tree hybrid? How do you swallow THAT? You don’t want to know.
Albus Dumbledore was a master of multitasking.
Albus: Yes, yes, I am. *preens*
Aberforth: At that?
Gellert: Y-
Aberforth: On second thought, can we just all forget I asked about that?
Gellert: *smirks*
In seconds COMMA! three things happened at once. Severus screamed, hot seed poured into Albus Dumbledore's eager mouth, and the distinct sound of tearing cloth rent the air. The fic’s sound had become desynchronized, with bizarre results. As the old wizard surveyed his handy work handiwork he could not keep from chuckling. Severus lay with the torn bits of the quilt still clutched in his hands, pale skin flushed and damp with sweat. He was panting as his black eyes stared up at Dumbledore with surprise, No comma needed. and fear.
The Headmaster licked his lips, savoring the taste. "Did you like that, my sweet? Need more?" He shrugged off his robes revealing the rock-hard shaft Severus still had nightmares about. The robes revealing his Hallows tattoo were kept on.
He also revealed a surprisingly youthful body.
The ancient wizard had broad shoulders, washboard-firm stomach, narrow waist, and he was hung like a centaur!
Gellert: Actually, that’s m-
Aberforth: None of us are interested, thank you.
Gellert: Albus is. |D
Aberforth: Yeah, well, I’m sure he sees plenty of it.
Gellert: Oh, yes.
Aberforth: …And I really should stop commenting before I hear something I’ll regret.
Gellert : And he moa-
Aberforth: *covers ears and starts loudly humming*
Snape gulped in amazement. Dumbledore had kept his robes on the first time. He had really seen only that purple head of the cock before it had disappeared into his body in a sea of pain.
Ariana: (Purple Rooster Head) *bobs up and down in a sea of pain*
And, as could be expected with their past relationship, Severus had never had occasion, or inclination to see the man naked. He could not believe that anyone over sixty could look like this, let alone someone who was nearly one hundred and sixty years old!
No wonder the Headmaster had been able to manhandle him so easily!
Poor Severus was so terrified that he could only gap
Ariana: (Sevvy) *turns into chasm again*
at Dumbledore, eyes wide with confusion, mouth open like a fish out of water.
How could this be? Past the wrinkles on his hands and face COMMA! the older wizard had well-defined muscles that fairly rippled as he moved, like an athlete.
Could it be natural? He very much doubted it unless Albus was not completely human. *insert “He’s an animal in bed” joke here* BAAAAAAAAAA! …
Was this done with the aid of a potion or some powerful magic, such as that of an authorial fantasy? This was much more likely.
Though very quickly Severus realized with an almost fatalistic calm that it did not matter how the old man had come to be that way. Because whether it was accomplished with magic or by natural forces, Albus Dumbledore's Herculean body, No need for a comma there. was about to fuck him into the mattress!
Gellert: This is a bad thing?
"It is time to consummate our marriage." Dumbledore smiled. Severus whimpered and tried unsuccessfully to disappear into the thick colorful quilts. "Yes, little one, be afraid," Dumbledore did not even try to suppress a very smug smirk
Aberforth: Closest to his actual self he’s gotten in the entire fic.
as his hand moved to guide his cock into the tight opening.
Ariana: But what if the rooster gets stuck?
"I have not yet begun to debauch!"
Gellert: AND NEITHER HAVE I! *pounces on Albus*
Aberforth: Aw, hell, we’re leaving. *steers Ariana out of the room*
Ariana: Can I debauch, too, Abby?
Aberforth: No.
Ariana: ):
Guardian’s Song: After Albus and Gellert are done *cough* debauching, we shall move on to Chapter 3. Hooray!