Confusion for the Land
I am still alive. No matter how much it hurts to be so. Battered, beaten, drained, stretched, and torn…but very much alive. Sometimes we wonder why the gods makes us feel this way…then others how we survive these trials? Are they only testaments of our will, are they for our benefit or theirs? I doubt any mortal will ever know the answer to that question. Yet even in the darkest of nights there are the brightest points of lights. Some say to bend and sway is the way of life….now that I have lived thorough some of the most excruciating torments I have come to this realization…those who bend and sway are those who stand for nothing. Out of the pains I have lived I know that I do not stand for nothing, I stand for something. In that standing we draw strength. Bend and sway and you will be ripped out by the torrent of the river, stand strong and unmovable and be cut down….in the end no one wins, everyone looses and dies, the only difference is how we go down. Peacefully and quiet….or with fury of thunder. Let the hands of perfect balance come to me. Once along time ago I never would have thought this…but now I wonder how I never saw it for what it was. Am I blind or do I see all too clearly? Or am I just past the point of jaded to something so far beyond?
In everyman’s heart there are two wolves fighting for supremacy, one love, one hate…which one wins you might ask. The one you feed.
Tomorrow I go to see doc with my evaluation board. After dislocating my shoulder again after my surgery I doubt I am going back to a ship. In fact if they keep me in I will be very very surprised. I would love to come home. Yet coming home brings new problems of its own. That means I go back to some simple shit job making little. Yet my sanity might come back, seeing friends, crafting, and everything else I enjoy. To get all that means dealing with my mother again. The state her house is in, I just can’t take it. She works at home and does nothing. She sleeps until the mid afternoon and then wakes up works a little. Her carefree lifestyle must be nice. Wish I could get away with doing nothing like she does. Arghh. I foresee horrible things if I move back home. Will it be everything I have missed or will I just be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire???
“The Profitt”
Mountainpeaks
In everyman’s heart there are two wolves fighting for supremacy, one love, one hate…which one wins you might ask. The one you feed.
Tomorrow I go to see doc with my evaluation board. After dislocating my shoulder again after my surgery I doubt I am going back to a ship. In fact if they keep me in I will be very very surprised. I would love to come home. Yet coming home brings new problems of its own. That means I go back to some simple shit job making little. Yet my sanity might come back, seeing friends, crafting, and everything else I enjoy. To get all that means dealing with my mother again. The state her house is in, I just can’t take it. She works at home and does nothing. She sleeps until the mid afternoon and then wakes up works a little. Her carefree lifestyle must be nice. Wish I could get away with doing nothing like she does. Arghh. I foresee horrible things if I move back home. Will it be everything I have missed or will I just be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire???
“The Profitt”
Mountainpeaks