(no subject)
will someone help me get the help I need???
yeah, I've been going through a lot of pain this past week, both good and bad. I dont know what's happening w/me. The good thing is that Carlyn has been on my side and has been there for me these past weeks. Thanx Carlyn 4 being there for me, I really appreciate all the talks we've been having, you helped me feel so much better, not to mention the fun times @ work......hehehe.....
Family-wise: I been having problems w/ Patty again, like always!! Gosh, she really pisses me off!!! She always on my case, even my dad has been noticing it! Ever since I got another job @ AMC, she's been hassling me about asking for more hours, what I'm planning to do w/ my money and picking little things to get me mad like the time I had to work til 10pm and Carlyn had to work @ 1am so I waited 4 her since she was my ride home. She got so mad cause I got home late. It's none of her business when I get home. I understand she's trying 2 care for me, but everytime I need 2 go out or I'm @ home, she calls me and wants 2 know my whole schedule of what I'm doing. Then she tells me 2 do something or to go exercise cause I need 2 lose weight. Like 2day, I was asleep, no school, no work, so I was asleep, she calls my cell phone @ freaking 6:55 am to see what I was planning 2 do or if I was going to leave the house. I actually wanted 2 sleep in and that just ruined my day......... Then I guess she realized that I wasn't awake, She clicks and calls my sister.....SHE SHOULD HAVE JUST DONE THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!! ergh!!!!!
I try so hard 2 keep in touch w/ people in my family but they hardly contact me. I found out about a family event the day of the event, plus I had plans 4 something else. My aunt called me and asked if I was going or if we had recieved an invite. We never got an invite........ they tell me there's no drama between my dad and them...but it still looks like my sister and I are still in the middle of this war........
The whole weight issue: Yes if you havent noticed, I'm fat but I love my curves!!! I try 2 tell my dad and Patty that, but all they say is you'll be more prettier when I lose some weight. And when I actually do lose it, they say oh..it's up 2 you, we're not forcing you...... I proud to be overweight!! There's nothing wrong about it!! I'm pretty healthy and I can do a lot of things that some overweight people can't do....so hey I'm a pretty average person!!! And if it my time 2 go, then it's my time. I not hoping 4 it 2 come, but it's what I feel is true.
Work is fun, I have Carlyn there @ times, but sometimes I don't feel comfortable there. I can tell a lot of people @ work think I'm a snob or some concided chick trying 2 earn extra money. I'm nice and try 2 talk 2 them , but they all have their own issues, so whatever.......There are some people I'm cool with so that's alright. I just wish would just stop judging me and just get 2 know the real me!!!
Lovelife: sucks a lot!!! I'm crushing on someone at this very moment!! He's such a sweetheart!!! I would so tell him but the only issue is REJECTION!!! I've only build up the guts 2 tell crushes, and when I do tell them, then they tell me they are gay, not interested or I'm not their type ( AKA: not their body type) There's more to me that meets the eye.....I'm not shallow and I'm confident. Most girls struggle with themselves and choose the jerks their with ( no offense, this doesnt apply to anyone). I've never been in love before..never been in a relationship...I just want 2 feel what it's like 2 be cared about by someone.
ok...I really needed 2 spill my heart out, and that felt really good..... leave comments, call me, do whatever u want!!! I'm sorry if I offended anyone.....
so thats my life as of now......
MJ
yeah, I've been going through a lot of pain this past week, both good and bad. I dont know what's happening w/me. The good thing is that Carlyn has been on my side and has been there for me these past weeks. Thanx Carlyn 4 being there for me, I really appreciate all the talks we've been having, you helped me feel so much better, not to mention the fun times @ work......hehehe.....
Family-wise: I been having problems w/ Patty again, like always!! Gosh, she really pisses me off!!! She always on my case, even my dad has been noticing it! Ever since I got another job @ AMC, she's been hassling me about asking for more hours, what I'm planning to do w/ my money and picking little things to get me mad like the time I had to work til 10pm and Carlyn had to work @ 1am so I waited 4 her since she was my ride home. She got so mad cause I got home late. It's none of her business when I get home. I understand she's trying 2 care for me, but everytime I need 2 go out or I'm @ home, she calls me and wants 2 know my whole schedule of what I'm doing. Then she tells me 2 do something or to go exercise cause I need 2 lose weight. Like 2day, I was asleep, no school, no work, so I was asleep, she calls my cell phone @ freaking 6:55 am to see what I was planning 2 do or if I was going to leave the house. I actually wanted 2 sleep in and that just ruined my day......... Then I guess she realized that I wasn't awake, She clicks and calls my sister.....SHE SHOULD HAVE JUST DONE THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!! ergh!!!!!
I try so hard 2 keep in touch w/ people in my family but they hardly contact me. I found out about a family event the day of the event, plus I had plans 4 something else. My aunt called me and asked if I was going or if we had recieved an invite. We never got an invite........ they tell me there's no drama between my dad and them...but it still looks like my sister and I are still in the middle of this war........
The whole weight issue: Yes if you havent noticed, I'm fat but I love my curves!!! I try 2 tell my dad and Patty that, but all they say is you'll be more prettier when I lose some weight. And when I actually do lose it, they say oh..it's up 2 you, we're not forcing you...... I proud to be overweight!! There's nothing wrong about it!! I'm pretty healthy and I can do a lot of things that some overweight people can't do....so hey I'm a pretty average person!!! And if it my time 2 go, then it's my time. I not hoping 4 it 2 come, but it's what I feel is true.
Work is fun, I have Carlyn there @ times, but sometimes I don't feel comfortable there. I can tell a lot of people @ work think I'm a snob or some concided chick trying 2 earn extra money. I'm nice and try 2 talk 2 them , but they all have their own issues, so whatever.......There are some people I'm cool with so that's alright. I just wish would just stop judging me and just get 2 know the real me!!!
Lovelife: sucks a lot!!! I'm crushing on someone at this very moment!! He's such a sweetheart!!! I would so tell him but the only issue is REJECTION!!! I've only build up the guts 2 tell crushes, and when I do tell them, then they tell me they are gay, not interested or I'm not their type ( AKA: not their body type) There's more to me that meets the eye.....I'm not shallow and I'm confident. Most girls struggle with themselves and choose the jerks their with ( no offense, this doesnt apply to anyone). I've never been in love before..never been in a relationship...I just want 2 feel what it's like 2 be cared about by someone.
ok...I really needed 2 spill my heart out, and that felt really good..... leave comments, call me, do whatever u want!!! I'm sorry if I offended anyone.....
so thats my life as of now......
MJ