spankings from the spatula
i got my small pox shot
and i feel groovay!
like i want to speak ebonix
without the accent
and get a tatoo
like something in hebrew
like peace thru war and shit
i lost my wallet thismorning and that pissed me off. i'm lucky i emptied my walled into my rack last night or i'd have no money. so i only lost my eel skin wallet my mom got me for christmas and i lost the thirty bucks i've earned since last night.
i am a thug and i muscle junior seamen out of their lunch money. i think karma came back to me and kicked me in the ass. comments?
lauren and i tried to match our ballancing skills today. we hopped one foot to see who could outlast the other. but we had to stop because i got a phone call. our legs got tired too.
i could do six pullups today! yeah. i do pullups when i'm bored.
loy (aka sailor of the day) is entitled free laundry service and he thinks that means he can throw his shit on my rack and i'll do it for free. he kept bugging me about it until thismorning.
"why wont you do it?"
"because your an asshole loy! you keep acting like an asshole you get treated like an asshole. i'll get to you when i feel modivated enough, damnit.
"you did goats last night and not me. why?"
"i did goats because i wanted to."
"i'm gonna tell cmc (command master cheif)"
"and what are you going to prove?"
"that you do people's stuff for money."
"you can't prove shit!"
anyhow... that would sound gay out of context. totaly. anyhow. so later he gave me five bucks and bitched about paying for a free service and i just told him strait up that i don't give a shit and if he has a problem to talk to my supervisor and he'd only find out that i'm right.
i'm such a badass motherfucker huh?
well at first i thought it was a sting operation but i went ahead and accepted the money anyway. he was happy to see his laundry and now he's sucking my dick. not litteraly but i got him down there. down in the hole where he belong.
but since i lost my wallet, i dont have that five dollars. i might as well done it for free to begin with. but hey. i showed him who wouldn't get walked all over. you ain't walkin' all over this dude 'cos he's a hard motherfucka'
anyhow. i'm done. with that.
its funny how people talk shit about you on the shit but nobody will tell you what they are saying. and if they do, they wont tell you who said it. they'll just say i heard from someone and be so vague about it. and then they say i forgot who it was or they were behind a wall or something lame like that.
it doesn't bother me that people think i'm bi or gay or whatever. well everybody knows im dating lauren so they aught to know i'm not gay. but it's more funny than anything. and it just bothers me how they treat me. even if i was gay, is that a reason to stop being friends with me? to make fun of me behind my back?
my favorite is when people ask "are you gay?"
of course i say "no."
and they respond with "oh i wouldn't think you were gay for a moment."
then why the fuck are you asking, guy? i'm no dip shit but i know when someone is feeling uncomfortable like they don't trust you to keep from whipping out your dick and stickin' it their butt like it needed some dc (dammage controll) patching and shoring.
...ok that was lame.
why does everything come back to sex? its nuts.
oh my god. my supervisor, sh2 hasaan is always talking about his nuts. his almonds actualy. he's like would you like some of my nuts? or you'll like my nuts in you're mouth and shit like that.
well its funny shit when you've been out to sea for afew weeks.
did i tell you about my small pox shot? well i got a small pox shot and the coreman was all talkative like your doctor would be and he's getting ready and calming me down with his words and...
"i got my war face on!" i called
"stick it to me baby. bring it on!" i challenged.
there was a female coreman watching and she was weirded out so much she had to leave.
yeah. and lauren and i are in the library. things feel weird today. i think it's me. i'm weird. ive been acting so silly (retarded) lately. i'm such a big dork. everything comes back to sex (because im sexualy frusterated) and i'm overly agressive (probably because im sexualy frusterated).
i want to wrestle. and fight. knife fights sound good now. and tattoos. i'm thinking about getting something in hebrew even tho i'm not jewish. something related to the concept of phoenix, death and resurection. i'm into that shit. hardcore.
lauren is a real cool girl. everybody keeps saying we're perfect for eachother. but i'm not going to buy into that shit right away. things could get messy. i like this girl a lot and she's probably going to read this but i dont care i like her a lot. just things could get messy. circumstances. working together. navy life. but i like this girl so much. its difficult. life beats you over the head and makes you stupid happy. god bless america.
sweet jesus and his candy eggs. i found them thismorning. under a fern plant. it was green but the eggs were brown chocolate and milky like a pregnant nipple.
i got no new email so i'm kind of sad. i sent some more email out to lisa and sarah. those are the only two civilian emails i have. other than mom and dad of course. i generaly dont tell them too much i feel guilty. but not. they dont want to know about how i do marine laundry in exchange for oral sex. but some of them are so good!
actualy, i'm joking. really. i don't do that shit.
i wonder if lauren is upset with me. i wish we could have some time to ourselves. i guess we're gaining a lot of unusual life experiences together right now but it feels like we're just wasting our time. i think later when we're older we'll look back with fond memories. these are the days of our lives and you gotta love them in memory. its just real time thats hard to deal with. oh yeah.
everybody in laundery likes portishead. some want to sample it and make phay phlows over it. like rap their words and shit. hasaan likes her voice. me too. its fucking sexy. except israel is a dumb slut and things its lame. she can suck a fatty.
anyhow i'm done. pirates of the carabean is on the tv. savvy?
check out this site because its funny. thanks alex!
but does anybody know where i can find an english to hebrew translator? i just want to be able to figure out what words i want to tatoo on me. i must think long and hard. well not long and hard, but profound thinking is important.
and i feel groovay!
like i want to speak ebonix
without the accent
and get a tatoo
like something in hebrew
like peace thru war and shit
i lost my wallet thismorning and that pissed me off. i'm lucky i emptied my walled into my rack last night or i'd have no money. so i only lost my eel skin wallet my mom got me for christmas and i lost the thirty bucks i've earned since last night.
i am a thug and i muscle junior seamen out of their lunch money. i think karma came back to me and kicked me in the ass. comments?
lauren and i tried to match our ballancing skills today. we hopped one foot to see who could outlast the other. but we had to stop because i got a phone call. our legs got tired too.
i could do six pullups today! yeah. i do pullups when i'm bored.
loy (aka sailor of the day) is entitled free laundry service and he thinks that means he can throw his shit on my rack and i'll do it for free. he kept bugging me about it until thismorning.
"why wont you do it?"
"because your an asshole loy! you keep acting like an asshole you get treated like an asshole. i'll get to you when i feel modivated enough, damnit.
"you did goats last night and not me. why?"
"i did goats because i wanted to."
"i'm gonna tell cmc (command master cheif)"
"and what are you going to prove?"
"that you do people's stuff for money."
"you can't prove shit!"
anyhow... that would sound gay out of context. totaly. anyhow. so later he gave me five bucks and bitched about paying for a free service and i just told him strait up that i don't give a shit and if he has a problem to talk to my supervisor and he'd only find out that i'm right.
i'm such a badass motherfucker huh?
well at first i thought it was a sting operation but i went ahead and accepted the money anyway. he was happy to see his laundry and now he's sucking my dick. not litteraly but i got him down there. down in the hole where he belong.
but since i lost my wallet, i dont have that five dollars. i might as well done it for free to begin with. but hey. i showed him who wouldn't get walked all over. you ain't walkin' all over this dude 'cos he's a hard motherfucka'
anyhow. i'm done. with that.
its funny how people talk shit about you on the shit but nobody will tell you what they are saying. and if they do, they wont tell you who said it. they'll just say i heard from someone and be so vague about it. and then they say i forgot who it was or they were behind a wall or something lame like that.
it doesn't bother me that people think i'm bi or gay or whatever. well everybody knows im dating lauren so they aught to know i'm not gay. but it's more funny than anything. and it just bothers me how they treat me. even if i was gay, is that a reason to stop being friends with me? to make fun of me behind my back?
my favorite is when people ask "are you gay?"
of course i say "no."
and they respond with "oh i wouldn't think you were gay for a moment."
then why the fuck are you asking, guy? i'm no dip shit but i know when someone is feeling uncomfortable like they don't trust you to keep from whipping out your dick and stickin' it their butt like it needed some dc (dammage controll) patching and shoring.
...ok that was lame.
why does everything come back to sex? its nuts.
oh my god. my supervisor, sh2 hasaan is always talking about his nuts. his almonds actualy. he's like would you like some of my nuts? or you'll like my nuts in you're mouth and shit like that.
well its funny shit when you've been out to sea for afew weeks.
did i tell you about my small pox shot? well i got a small pox shot and the coreman was all talkative like your doctor would be and he's getting ready and calming me down with his words and...
"i got my war face on!" i called
"stick it to me baby. bring it on!" i challenged.
there was a female coreman watching and she was weirded out so much she had to leave.
yeah. and lauren and i are in the library. things feel weird today. i think it's me. i'm weird. ive been acting so silly (retarded) lately. i'm such a big dork. everything comes back to sex (because im sexualy frusterated) and i'm overly agressive (probably because im sexualy frusterated).
i want to wrestle. and fight. knife fights sound good now. and tattoos. i'm thinking about getting something in hebrew even tho i'm not jewish. something related to the concept of phoenix, death and resurection. i'm into that shit. hardcore.
lauren is a real cool girl. everybody keeps saying we're perfect for eachother. but i'm not going to buy into that shit right away. things could get messy. i like this girl a lot and she's probably going to read this but i dont care i like her a lot. just things could get messy. circumstances. working together. navy life. but i like this girl so much. its difficult. life beats you over the head and makes you stupid happy. god bless america.
sweet jesus and his candy eggs. i found them thismorning. under a fern plant. it was green but the eggs were brown chocolate and milky like a pregnant nipple.
i got no new email so i'm kind of sad. i sent some more email out to lisa and sarah. those are the only two civilian emails i have. other than mom and dad of course. i generaly dont tell them too much i feel guilty. but not. they dont want to know about how i do marine laundry in exchange for oral sex. but some of them are so good!
actualy, i'm joking. really. i don't do that shit.
i wonder if lauren is upset with me. i wish we could have some time to ourselves. i guess we're gaining a lot of unusual life experiences together right now but it feels like we're just wasting our time. i think later when we're older we'll look back with fond memories. these are the days of our lives and you gotta love them in memory. its just real time thats hard to deal with. oh yeah.
everybody in laundery likes portishead. some want to sample it and make phay phlows over it. like rap their words and shit. hasaan likes her voice. me too. its fucking sexy. except israel is a dumb slut and things its lame. she can suck a fatty.
anyhow i'm done. pirates of the carabean is on the tv. savvy?
check out this site because its funny. thanks alex!
but does anybody know where i can find an english to hebrew translator? i just want to be able to figure out what words i want to tatoo on me. i must think long and hard. well not long and hard, but profound thinking is important.