Hiding
Title: Hiding
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Peter/Claire, Andy/Claire
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Claire's been hiding; hiding from her powers and from the man she loves. Claire's thoughts during String Theory.
A/N: This is my first Heroes fic! I'd love any constructive criticism anyone has, 'cause I'd like to know if I have the characters down or not. Thanks to sweetbelle07 and Jayne @ Fanforum for the beta. You guys are awesome. :D Also, there's a Peter part to this coming, so look out for that. :)
She's getting married. She's getting married.
When she sees her father sitting at a table in her diner, that's all she can think. When he tells her she has to leave again, she looks down at the ring on her finger and says that she can't. "I'm getting married."
He looks up at her, shock on his face, and says, "Have you told him?"
She continues wipe the table, looks down, tells him, "No."
For five years she's been hiding. She moves from state to state, changing the style and color of her hair, choosing different names for herself, all to escape from the people who want to destroy her, all the people who can take her power and take over the world. She's kept her distance with the people she meets, but Andy had been the exception. He was a great guy, too sweet to stay away from.
She's allowed herself to fall in love with him, however dangerous that might be. Though he knows her by a different name, she likes to think that he really does love her, Claire. He knows of her love of cupcakes, country music, and shopping. He knows that she hates cold weather, funerals, and Nathan Petrelli (though she'll never tell him that he's her father.)
She knows that he'd never betray her if he ever found out about her power, but Claire won't ever let him find out. It's a part of her she doesn't want anyone to know about. All she's ever wanted is a normal life.
When her father leaves and she's starting to pack her things, she realizes she'll never have a normal life. From the second she discovered she could heal herself, she knew things would never be the same. When Peter Petrelli had saved her at Homecoming from Sylar, she knew she was stuck, that she'd never be away from the madness of it all.
The ticket in her hand is to Las Vegas. This is where Peter lives now, or so he's written to her. For some reason he always knows who and where to address the letters to. He's the only one besides her father who knows she's still alive, not even Nathan knows.
He's visited her once, in California. Just showed up inside the diner she was waitressing at one day, staring at the menu intensely, his hair slicked back, his new scar adding a whole new dimension to his face. He'd ordered a pie, and she'd been so shocked to see him; so scared and exhilarated and happy and angry.
Because at the time, and even now, she'd been hiding from Peter Petrelli, too.
*
Four Years Ago
"What are you doing here?" she says as she sets the pie in front of him.
Seeing him erupts so many emotions inside of her that it makes her dizzy. It's been a year, a full year since she's seen him last. All this time she's been trying to lead a different life, trying to keep her head down. She's been hiding from her powers, or at least that's what she's been telling herself, but seeing Peter here now reminds her of what else she's been running away from.
She slides into the seat across from him, her hands shaking slightly. She's more nervous than she's been in a long time and it's all because of him.
"Leaving me a note isn't a good way to say goodbye, Claire," he says, ignoring the pie and resting his chin on his hands, looking at her directly in the eye.
She lowers her eyes. She doesn't like the way he's looking her at her; it's bringing back memories, memories she's tried to push away. "My name's Tracy," she says, and she says it with such confidence that she almost believes it's true. "And you were in a coma, Peter, recovering from the explosion. There was no time to say goodbye."
Peter looks her up and down then, from her black hair to the nosering in her nose to the baby blue uniform she is wearing. And then he looks at the table. "Nice shoes," he comments, and she opens her mouth, but he cuts her off. "I can see through things now. Got that from a guy a couple of days ago."
"Good for you," she says, torn between being happy for him and fighting back her own bitterness. She doesn't understand how he can be so proud of having a new power, especially when the world has turned against them. He's continuing to embrace his powers, content with being abnormal, about being a freak. Part of her wishes she could be like that, but overall she feels damned because of her power, not blessed.
"You look so different," he says, nodding toward her.
"So do you," she says, glancing up at him, her eyes landing on the black trench coat he's wearing despite the 80 degree weather.
"I think I like it," Peter says, finally picking up a fork and taking a bite of the pie. Then, with a smile, says, "Makes you look less innocent."
"I was never innocent," Claire snaps. She's surprised at the harsh tone her voice has taken on, and she sees the guilt flash across Peter's face, but she doesn't care. She's kept her anger, frustration and shame buried for so long and it feels good to let it out.
Claire blames him for it. For coming to her rescue, for smiling at her and making her heart flutter for the first time. He had made her fall for him, over and over, even after they had found out they were related. She had confessed to him, the night before New York City was destroyed, that her feelings for him were anything but innocent. She had kissed him, and he'd kissed her back. Then she'd left, feeling dirty and guilty, because even though it was wrong, it had felt so right.
"Claire, it's okay," he says in a soft voice, and tears start to spring up in her eyes. She shouldn't have to deal with this, not now, not ever. She doesn't want to. She just wants him to leave. Then she can be normal - not the girl who heals and is in love with her uncle.
Peter reaches across the table, covering her hands with his, and she flinches at his touch. Why was he doing this to her? Why was he making her feel this way?
"Why are you here?" she asks, pulling her hands away and placing them in her lap. She's avoiding his eyes again, staring at her hands, still warm from his touch. Just that simple action has made her feel vulnerable and exposed, and she can't stand it.
"I came to see you," Peter says. "Thought you'd be happy to see me."
"I told you in my note not to come looking for me," she says, but she's thinking the exact opposite. She's thinking of how much she's missed him and how much she loves him, how his prescence is making her happy and killing her at the same time.
Peter lets out a long breath then, and Claire glares at him. "Did you just read my thoughts?" she accuses him.
He opens his mouth, probably to lie, but that wouldn't have mattered because Peter's always been a horrible liar. "Fine, then, Peter. What am I thinking right now?"
"Claire, I - "
"No, I want you to read my thoughts," she tells him forcefully.
Do you even know how much danger you're putting me in right now, Peter? Anyone could be watching us. They could be tracking us. Sylar's still out there -
"Sylar's dead, Claire," Peter says suddenly, angrily, and his whole face changes. He leans forward, his face hovering inches away from hers. "He exploded."
"Tracy," she says to him, standing up from the table abruptly. And we both know who really exploded that day.
Peter looks surprised, and now he's the one who's avoiding her eyes. He doesn't know what to say to that, and she's glad she's made him speechless for once.
"I'm not naive, Peter." She leans down to him, whispering in his ear. "Sylar's still out there, and he could be after me right now, along with anyone else who wants to steal my power and become indestructible. Not to mention the government and all the normal people who want to destroy us freaks."
She pulls back, wiping her eyes, willing herself not to break down. Finally he stares up at her, and her breath hitches because the way he's looking at her is the way he used to look at her, before they were uncle and niece, before the world came crashing down, back when there was still hope.
There is no hope now. She turns her back on him, starts to walk away, but he gets up from the table and grabs her arm before she can leave. "Claire," he says, and she can feel the desperation in his voice, can see it on his face. He doesn't want her to leave. He's like her, he doesn't want to be alone in the fight against the world. And, God, how she wants to be with him, wants to reach up and kiss his scarred face, move her fingers through his hair. But she can't. They can't.
"My name is Tracy," Claire says for the last time, the tears flowing freely down her cheeks now. Peter's hands reach down, his fingers brushing over her cheeks, wiping them away. He's always wanted to heal her, take away her pain. But it's not his place, she won't allow him to. She takes his hands in hers, moves them away from her, and steps back.
"Don't forget to pay for your pie," she says, voice trembling, and she throws the receipt down on the table and walks away.
*
He'd never visited her again, but he'd continued to write her letters. Short, cryptic messages telling her of what he was up to, how Hiro was doing, how Niki was coping with DL's and Micah's deaths. They were impersonal, useless to her, but each time she received one her heart started to beat a little faster.
She sees Andy now, and lets a small smile come to her face. He's all she's got in the world now. He's not complicated, not confusing, not wrong like Peter was. He's everything she needs, everything she's wanted for so long, everything that's normal.
Claire walks over to him. She doesn't want to be alone in this, doesn't want to keep hiding from him. She can't stand the thought of leaving Andy broken-hearted, wondering why she suddenly left him before they were to be married. Maybe if she tells him he'll understand, maybe he'll love her anyway...if there's any chance that she can be with him, then she has to take it. She has to come clean.
"Let's elope," she says when she approaches him, and Andy looks rightfully startled.
"What?"
"Let's elope," she says again, "right now...run away, I'm thinking Vegas. We'll pack our bags, get hitched tonight, take off, see the world, what do you think?"
"I think you're crazy," he says, and her heart sinks a little.
"Maybe," she agrees, "Probably. But I've got my reasons. And I promise I'll tell you everything." The smile leaves Andy's face, as she sees him realize how serious this moment is, how life changing it could be. "Will you do it?" she asks him. "For me?"
There's a pause and Claire feels like the rest of her life is dependant on his answer. "I'll do anything for you."
She grins and he goes to get his things. She can't remember feeling this happy in a long time, feeling like there's someone else she can trust again, someone else she can rely on. That person used to be Peter, but she doesn't have to dwell on him or everything else that she's lost anymore. She can finally focus on her future.
"Can I get you something, sir?" she asks the man in front of her.
He takes the menu away from his face and her heart plummets to the bottom of her stomach.
*
She stands in the Petrelli mansion, staring at the pictures on the mantelpiece with a hard expression on her face. Claire can hardly fight back the anger she's feeling. They've found her. Forced her to leave Andy. And now she's facing her real family again, something she never thought she'd have to do again.
Her eyes automatically seek Peter in the pictures, and she sighs inwardly. She's going to have to meet him again. Going to have to face what was between them, finally, after all these years. She doesn't want to. She's tried to get rid of her memory of him all this time, just as she's tried to forget everyone who was like her. Even now she can feel the tension between them, and he's only looking at her through a picture frame.
"I thought you were dead," a voice says, and she spins around to see Nathan. "You have no idea how important you are to me, Claire," he says, and she flinches a little at the sound of her real name.
"I'm not important," she says, "I'm just a waitress."
She can remember similar words from five years ago, of Peter asking her if by saving her he had saved the world, and of her saying, "I don't know. I'm just a cheerleader."
He'd risked his life for her and in the end it hadn't even mattered. He'd exploded, and so many lives had been lost. Now the world was dark, vicious, afraid. They hadn't saved the world, not at all. They hadn't even been able to save each other.
She's thinking of Peter, thinking of their first meeting, and the next thing she knows, Nathan is trying to give her a hug. She shoves him away.
"You made everyone afraid of us," she spits out, hating him. You made me hide all these years, hide from who I was, she thinks to herself.
"I made everyone aware of us," he says softly. "Fear is a natural response. You can't blame them, really, we're more powerful than they are, more important. We're special."
Claire can't believe what she's hearing. She's never liked Nathan, but she can't believe what he's become. "Who are you to decide who's special and who's not?" She goes to move around him, but he grabs her arm.
"I'm the leader of the free world. For all I know I'm the most special person there is. Lord knows I found enough power, met a lot of special people. Like this girl named Candice who allowed me to become President."
It hits Claire all at once. This voice, it's not Nathan's. These words...Nathan would never talk like this. Fear hits her straight in the heart and she needs to get away from him, just get away. She needs to find Peter, tell him there's something wrong with his brother.
He continues to talk, but she's only half hearing what he says. Her breath starts to come in pants, blood rushing through her veins, panicked and scared. "I don't need any more power, especially not after you," he says, and Claire feels the hairs on the back of her neck prickle, and she starts to run away.
Then she's frozen in place, she can't move. It's Sylar, she knows that without even facing him. She knows she's going to die and suddenly she regrets all the time she's been angry at Peter, angry at herself. All the time she never got to spend with him. All the times she could have told him she loved him, and didn't.
As her head splits open, Claire can't feel the pain. Sylar's hold on her is so strong that she's unable to heal.
Blood runs down her face and she can taste it on her lips. He's going to take her power, and then he'll be unstoppable.
I'm sorry Peter, she thinks, hoping that somewhere out there, he can hear her. Sorry I didn't save the world.
Read the sequel/companion piece here!
Fandom: Heroes
Pairing: Peter/Claire, Andy/Claire
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Claire's been hiding; hiding from her powers and from the man she loves. Claire's thoughts during String Theory.
A/N: This is my first Heroes fic! I'd love any constructive criticism anyone has, 'cause I'd like to know if I have the characters down or not. Thanks to sweetbelle07 and Jayne @ Fanforum for the beta. You guys are awesome. :D Also, there's a Peter part to this coming, so look out for that. :)
She's getting married. She's getting married.
When she sees her father sitting at a table in her diner, that's all she can think. When he tells her she has to leave again, she looks down at the ring on her finger and says that she can't. "I'm getting married."
He looks up at her, shock on his face, and says, "Have you told him?"
She continues wipe the table, looks down, tells him, "No."
For five years she's been hiding. She moves from state to state, changing the style and color of her hair, choosing different names for herself, all to escape from the people who want to destroy her, all the people who can take her power and take over the world. She's kept her distance with the people she meets, but Andy had been the exception. He was a great guy, too sweet to stay away from.
She's allowed herself to fall in love with him, however dangerous that might be. Though he knows her by a different name, she likes to think that he really does love her, Claire. He knows of her love of cupcakes, country music, and shopping. He knows that she hates cold weather, funerals, and Nathan Petrelli (though she'll never tell him that he's her father.)
She knows that he'd never betray her if he ever found out about her power, but Claire won't ever let him find out. It's a part of her she doesn't want anyone to know about. All she's ever wanted is a normal life.
When her father leaves and she's starting to pack her things, she realizes she'll never have a normal life. From the second she discovered she could heal herself, she knew things would never be the same. When Peter Petrelli had saved her at Homecoming from Sylar, she knew she was stuck, that she'd never be away from the madness of it all.
The ticket in her hand is to Las Vegas. This is where Peter lives now, or so he's written to her. For some reason he always knows who and where to address the letters to. He's the only one besides her father who knows she's still alive, not even Nathan knows.
He's visited her once, in California. Just showed up inside the diner she was waitressing at one day, staring at the menu intensely, his hair slicked back, his new scar adding a whole new dimension to his face. He'd ordered a pie, and she'd been so shocked to see him; so scared and exhilarated and happy and angry.
Because at the time, and even now, she'd been hiding from Peter Petrelli, too.
*
Four Years Ago
"What are you doing here?" she says as she sets the pie in front of him.
Seeing him erupts so many emotions inside of her that it makes her dizzy. It's been a year, a full year since she's seen him last. All this time she's been trying to lead a different life, trying to keep her head down. She's been hiding from her powers, or at least that's what she's been telling herself, but seeing Peter here now reminds her of what else she's been running away from.
She slides into the seat across from him, her hands shaking slightly. She's more nervous than she's been in a long time and it's all because of him.
"Leaving me a note isn't a good way to say goodbye, Claire," he says, ignoring the pie and resting his chin on his hands, looking at her directly in the eye.
She lowers her eyes. She doesn't like the way he's looking her at her; it's bringing back memories, memories she's tried to push away. "My name's Tracy," she says, and she says it with such confidence that she almost believes it's true. "And you were in a coma, Peter, recovering from the explosion. There was no time to say goodbye."
Peter looks her up and down then, from her black hair to the nosering in her nose to the baby blue uniform she is wearing. And then he looks at the table. "Nice shoes," he comments, and she opens her mouth, but he cuts her off. "I can see through things now. Got that from a guy a couple of days ago."
"Good for you," she says, torn between being happy for him and fighting back her own bitterness. She doesn't understand how he can be so proud of having a new power, especially when the world has turned against them. He's continuing to embrace his powers, content with being abnormal, about being a freak. Part of her wishes she could be like that, but overall she feels damned because of her power, not blessed.
"You look so different," he says, nodding toward her.
"So do you," she says, glancing up at him, her eyes landing on the black trench coat he's wearing despite the 80 degree weather.
"I think I like it," Peter says, finally picking up a fork and taking a bite of the pie. Then, with a smile, says, "Makes you look less innocent."
"I was never innocent," Claire snaps. She's surprised at the harsh tone her voice has taken on, and she sees the guilt flash across Peter's face, but she doesn't care. She's kept her anger, frustration and shame buried for so long and it feels good to let it out.
Claire blames him for it. For coming to her rescue, for smiling at her and making her heart flutter for the first time. He had made her fall for him, over and over, even after they had found out they were related. She had confessed to him, the night before New York City was destroyed, that her feelings for him were anything but innocent. She had kissed him, and he'd kissed her back. Then she'd left, feeling dirty and guilty, because even though it was wrong, it had felt so right.
"Claire, it's okay," he says in a soft voice, and tears start to spring up in her eyes. She shouldn't have to deal with this, not now, not ever. She doesn't want to. She just wants him to leave. Then she can be normal - not the girl who heals and is in love with her uncle.
Peter reaches across the table, covering her hands with his, and she flinches at his touch. Why was he doing this to her? Why was he making her feel this way?
"Why are you here?" she asks, pulling her hands away and placing them in her lap. She's avoiding his eyes again, staring at her hands, still warm from his touch. Just that simple action has made her feel vulnerable and exposed, and she can't stand it.
"I came to see you," Peter says. "Thought you'd be happy to see me."
"I told you in my note not to come looking for me," she says, but she's thinking the exact opposite. She's thinking of how much she's missed him and how much she loves him, how his prescence is making her happy and killing her at the same time.
Peter lets out a long breath then, and Claire glares at him. "Did you just read my thoughts?" she accuses him.
He opens his mouth, probably to lie, but that wouldn't have mattered because Peter's always been a horrible liar. "Fine, then, Peter. What am I thinking right now?"
"Claire, I - "
"No, I want you to read my thoughts," she tells him forcefully.
Do you even know how much danger you're putting me in right now, Peter? Anyone could be watching us. They could be tracking us. Sylar's still out there -
"Sylar's dead, Claire," Peter says suddenly, angrily, and his whole face changes. He leans forward, his face hovering inches away from hers. "He exploded."
"Tracy," she says to him, standing up from the table abruptly. And we both know who really exploded that day.
Peter looks surprised, and now he's the one who's avoiding her eyes. He doesn't know what to say to that, and she's glad she's made him speechless for once.
"I'm not naive, Peter." She leans down to him, whispering in his ear. "Sylar's still out there, and he could be after me right now, along with anyone else who wants to steal my power and become indestructible. Not to mention the government and all the normal people who want to destroy us freaks."
She pulls back, wiping her eyes, willing herself not to break down. Finally he stares up at her, and her breath hitches because the way he's looking at her is the way he used to look at her, before they were uncle and niece, before the world came crashing down, back when there was still hope.
There is no hope now. She turns her back on him, starts to walk away, but he gets up from the table and grabs her arm before she can leave. "Claire," he says, and she can feel the desperation in his voice, can see it on his face. He doesn't want her to leave. He's like her, he doesn't want to be alone in the fight against the world. And, God, how she wants to be with him, wants to reach up and kiss his scarred face, move her fingers through his hair. But she can't. They can't.
"My name is Tracy," Claire says for the last time, the tears flowing freely down her cheeks now. Peter's hands reach down, his fingers brushing over her cheeks, wiping them away. He's always wanted to heal her, take away her pain. But it's not his place, she won't allow him to. She takes his hands in hers, moves them away from her, and steps back.
"Don't forget to pay for your pie," she says, voice trembling, and she throws the receipt down on the table and walks away.
*
He'd never visited her again, but he'd continued to write her letters. Short, cryptic messages telling her of what he was up to, how Hiro was doing, how Niki was coping with DL's and Micah's deaths. They were impersonal, useless to her, but each time she received one her heart started to beat a little faster.
She sees Andy now, and lets a small smile come to her face. He's all she's got in the world now. He's not complicated, not confusing, not wrong like Peter was. He's everything she needs, everything she's wanted for so long, everything that's normal.
Claire walks over to him. She doesn't want to be alone in this, doesn't want to keep hiding from him. She can't stand the thought of leaving Andy broken-hearted, wondering why she suddenly left him before they were to be married. Maybe if she tells him he'll understand, maybe he'll love her anyway...if there's any chance that she can be with him, then she has to take it. She has to come clean.
"Let's elope," she says when she approaches him, and Andy looks rightfully startled.
"What?"
"Let's elope," she says again, "right now...run away, I'm thinking Vegas. We'll pack our bags, get hitched tonight, take off, see the world, what do you think?"
"I think you're crazy," he says, and her heart sinks a little.
"Maybe," she agrees, "Probably. But I've got my reasons. And I promise I'll tell you everything." The smile leaves Andy's face, as she sees him realize how serious this moment is, how life changing it could be. "Will you do it?" she asks him. "For me?"
There's a pause and Claire feels like the rest of her life is dependant on his answer. "I'll do anything for you."
She grins and he goes to get his things. She can't remember feeling this happy in a long time, feeling like there's someone else she can trust again, someone else she can rely on. That person used to be Peter, but she doesn't have to dwell on him or everything else that she's lost anymore. She can finally focus on her future.
"Can I get you something, sir?" she asks the man in front of her.
He takes the menu away from his face and her heart plummets to the bottom of her stomach.
*
She stands in the Petrelli mansion, staring at the pictures on the mantelpiece with a hard expression on her face. Claire can hardly fight back the anger she's feeling. They've found her. Forced her to leave Andy. And now she's facing her real family again, something she never thought she'd have to do again.
Her eyes automatically seek Peter in the pictures, and she sighs inwardly. She's going to have to meet him again. Going to have to face what was between them, finally, after all these years. She doesn't want to. She's tried to get rid of her memory of him all this time, just as she's tried to forget everyone who was like her. Even now she can feel the tension between them, and he's only looking at her through a picture frame.
"I thought you were dead," a voice says, and she spins around to see Nathan. "You have no idea how important you are to me, Claire," he says, and she flinches a little at the sound of her real name.
"I'm not important," she says, "I'm just a waitress."
She can remember similar words from five years ago, of Peter asking her if by saving her he had saved the world, and of her saying, "I don't know. I'm just a cheerleader."
He'd risked his life for her and in the end it hadn't even mattered. He'd exploded, and so many lives had been lost. Now the world was dark, vicious, afraid. They hadn't saved the world, not at all. They hadn't even been able to save each other.
She's thinking of Peter, thinking of their first meeting, and the next thing she knows, Nathan is trying to give her a hug. She shoves him away.
"You made everyone afraid of us," she spits out, hating him. You made me hide all these years, hide from who I was, she thinks to herself.
"I made everyone aware of us," he says softly. "Fear is a natural response. You can't blame them, really, we're more powerful than they are, more important. We're special."
Claire can't believe what she's hearing. She's never liked Nathan, but she can't believe what he's become. "Who are you to decide who's special and who's not?" She goes to move around him, but he grabs her arm.
"I'm the leader of the free world. For all I know I'm the most special person there is. Lord knows I found enough power, met a lot of special people. Like this girl named Candice who allowed me to become President."
It hits Claire all at once. This voice, it's not Nathan's. These words...Nathan would never talk like this. Fear hits her straight in the heart and she needs to get away from him, just get away. She needs to find Peter, tell him there's something wrong with his brother.
He continues to talk, but she's only half hearing what he says. Her breath starts to come in pants, blood rushing through her veins, panicked and scared. "I don't need any more power, especially not after you," he says, and Claire feels the hairs on the back of her neck prickle, and she starts to run away.
Then she's frozen in place, she can't move. It's Sylar, she knows that without even facing him. She knows she's going to die and suddenly she regrets all the time she's been angry at Peter, angry at herself. All the time she never got to spend with him. All the times she could have told him she loved him, and didn't.
As her head splits open, Claire can't feel the pain. Sylar's hold on her is so strong that she's unable to heal.
Blood runs down her face and she can taste it on her lips. He's going to take her power, and then he'll be unstoppable.
I'm sorry Peter, she thinks, hoping that somewhere out there, he can hear her. Sorry I didn't save the world.
Read the sequel/companion piece here!