Sometimes life is about a $19.62 dollar paycheck and Consoling a friend at 11pm......
I had such a crappy past two days. I have had such a bad 16 years. Today was not worth living - I wanna go back or quit or something. At least wounds can heal. That is what meds and doctor bills are for.
Today - Woke up at 10 (first at 6, went to bed at 3am)Watched tv in my room for an hour and some, then the mail comes and - my schedule! Wait - no, it sucks! It is wrong, I feel sooo dumb. WE PROBABLY DO NOT HAVE SENIOR EMPOWERMENT WEEK! So I fight with Maura for a little while then Dad comes home - yay. Talk to him about my schedule - first he is joking mean, then he is cruel - Yells at me that I don't aprreciate him, how great he is and how I never say nothing good about him. How I am just like Colleen and and good for nothing and whatnot. So I go in my room, crying (cuz I always lose the fight), Stupid stuff again. Oh crap. Crying, negative therapy (I hate myself, I am worthless).
Did a page of summer reading, Rachael called and I talk to her for a little, trying to deal with bad schedules. We got Ice Cream, went to see if I had to work, I did so I said goodbye and had to fix all the stuff on my schedule to actually work. Oh yay. Worked with Tayla most of the night, talked to her. Talked to Danielle, both Melissa's, Yanick. I am really starting to meet some cool people. I got to do some register stuff, but mostly runs. Saw Stephanie and Chelsea, and Josh Faria. There were lots of people I knew working - Mr. Ames was pissed that I was working for someone who had lots of experience. Oh well. I hate Ice Cream and some of the people who work there. Got my check - $19.62, just for training though.
Got home, fought with Maura. Got online and read away messages. My friend was sad, and she said no one cared so I talked to a couple people real quick then got off. I called her cell 15 times. then I called 411, then after 5 minutes of that I called her house. "You called my house at 11 o' clock at night just to ask what is wrong?" Damn right I did. We talked for 44 minutes. Nice chat actually.
Got back online, YAY JESSICA CHAPMAN IS HOME!!!! Now I am here. Ya know - I realize I attract people who have a problem so I can fix it. I love helping people and talking to people. I think that is why I love volunteering versus working. I Love You all soooooo much.
My 2004/2005 Sched. :)
Period 1 - Concert Choir
Period 2 - English 4
Period 3 - Math Stratagies
Period 4 - Directed Study (I have NEVER had a study)
Period 5 - A Capella Choir
Period 6 - Current Issues/Law and Justice
Period 7 - Band (who is teaching it?)
Period 8 - Community Service (WTF?????? I can't stay afterschool, I have stuff!)
It is not at all good - I am not in theatre workshop, writing creatively, and forensics. DAMN! I have to work it out, but my dad won't sign the schedule change....
Today - Woke up at 10 (first at 6, went to bed at 3am)Watched tv in my room for an hour and some, then the mail comes and - my schedule! Wait - no, it sucks! It is wrong, I feel sooo dumb. WE PROBABLY DO NOT HAVE SENIOR EMPOWERMENT WEEK! So I fight with Maura for a little while then Dad comes home - yay. Talk to him about my schedule - first he is joking mean, then he is cruel - Yells at me that I don't aprreciate him, how great he is and how I never say nothing good about him. How I am just like Colleen and and good for nothing and whatnot. So I go in my room, crying (cuz I always lose the fight), Stupid stuff again. Oh crap. Crying, negative therapy (I hate myself, I am worthless).
Did a page of summer reading, Rachael called and I talk to her for a little, trying to deal with bad schedules. We got Ice Cream, went to see if I had to work, I did so I said goodbye and had to fix all the stuff on my schedule to actually work. Oh yay. Worked with Tayla most of the night, talked to her. Talked to Danielle, both Melissa's, Yanick. I am really starting to meet some cool people. I got to do some register stuff, but mostly runs. Saw Stephanie and Chelsea, and Josh Faria. There were lots of people I knew working - Mr. Ames was pissed that I was working for someone who had lots of experience. Oh well. I hate Ice Cream and some of the people who work there. Got my check - $19.62, just for training though.
Got home, fought with Maura. Got online and read away messages. My friend was sad, and she said no one cared so I talked to a couple people real quick then got off. I called her cell 15 times. then I called 411, then after 5 minutes of that I called her house. "You called my house at 11 o' clock at night just to ask what is wrong?" Damn right I did. We talked for 44 minutes. Nice chat actually.
Got back online, YAY JESSICA CHAPMAN IS HOME!!!! Now I am here. Ya know - I realize I attract people who have a problem so I can fix it. I love helping people and talking to people. I think that is why I love volunteering versus working. I Love You all soooooo much.
My 2004/2005 Sched. :)
Period 1 - Concert Choir
Period 2 - English 4
Period 3 - Math Stratagies
Period 4 - Directed Study (I have NEVER had a study)
Period 5 - A Capella Choir
Period 6 - Current Issues/Law and Justice
Period 7 - Band (who is teaching it?)
Period 8 - Community Service (WTF?????? I can't stay afterschool, I have stuff!)
It is not at all good - I am not in theatre workshop, writing creatively, and forensics. DAMN! I have to work it out, but my dad won't sign the schedule change....