bloody neglectful biyotch am I
Actually, its just that I'm quiet because I'm again OVERINVOLVED with my problems. I'm making myself vent about it right now.
The saga with my child continues. His teachers have come to the conclusion that he is actually one of the top kids in his class. They had some national testing the past few weeks, and according to those he's quite bril. According to his actual grades, he's gonna fail 3rd grade. Its all to do with his ability to maintain attention. They've done everything they know to do(which is considerable, since his homeroom teacher had an experience with her daughter that taught her a lot about ADHD people- caught it late that time, but she's apparently vigilant now) and they've got us resources for another program, a community one that we might be able to afford.
However, they've also had enough experience with this type of kid to be softly suggesting medication. One of the few things that can flat out make me cry, and did. Heh, I even broke out in a rash and pimples that I'm sporting today. Oh, Joy! Big stress does ugly things to me. But the idea that he's struggling so hard, and suffering the extra attention of his classmates (who say: but 'I' don't need special help- suggesting something is wrong with him. OMG the talks we've had) and the days when he's just crippled and becomes afraid to even try...
FUCK. You know? It isn't like the old days when it was a generic Ritalin the lil thing up. Something to focus while in school. Just enough to get by. Something to leave behind when its not needed. NON-addictive stuff. And some days I wish I had that, too. Meds that could clear my head up enough for me to get one thing done without 50 other things in my face, demanding attention with equal noise. hmm... make that almost every day...
But.. fuck my genes, destroying my child's life.
And again, with my car. I JUST need it to work for a little while. I don't want for much... I can't even get that. WTF. I don't dare set anything up work wise until I can get to an interview. I hate it all. Vehemently.
The saga with my child continues. His teachers have come to the conclusion that he is actually one of the top kids in his class. They had some national testing the past few weeks, and according to those he's quite bril. According to his actual grades, he's gonna fail 3rd grade. Its all to do with his ability to maintain attention. They've done everything they know to do(which is considerable, since his homeroom teacher had an experience with her daughter that taught her a lot about ADHD people- caught it late that time, but she's apparently vigilant now) and they've got us resources for another program, a community one that we might be able to afford.
However, they've also had enough experience with this type of kid to be softly suggesting medication. One of the few things that can flat out make me cry, and did. Heh, I even broke out in a rash and pimples that I'm sporting today. Oh, Joy! Big stress does ugly things to me. But the idea that he's struggling so hard, and suffering the extra attention of his classmates (who say: but 'I' don't need special help- suggesting something is wrong with him. OMG the talks we've had) and the days when he's just crippled and becomes afraid to even try...
FUCK. You know? It isn't like the old days when it was a generic Ritalin the lil thing up. Something to focus while in school. Just enough to get by. Something to leave behind when its not needed. NON-addictive stuff. And some days I wish I had that, too. Meds that could clear my head up enough for me to get one thing done without 50 other things in my face, demanding attention with equal noise. hmm... make that almost every day...
But.. fuck my genes, destroying my child's life.
And again, with my car. I JUST need it to work for a little while. I don't want for much... I can't even get that. WTF. I don't dare set anything up work wise until I can get to an interview. I hate it all. Vehemently.